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Where'd You Go, Bernadette: A Novel
Unavailable
Where'd You Go, Bernadette: A Novel
Unavailable
Where'd You Go, Bernadette: A Novel
Audiobook9 hours

Where'd You Go, Bernadette: A Novel

Written by Maria Semple

Narrated by Kathleen Wilhoite

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

4/5

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Currently unavailable

Currently unavailable

About this audiobook

Bernadette Fox is notorious. To her Microsoft-guru husband, she's a fearlessly opinionated partner; to fellow private-school mothers in Seattle, she's a disgrace; to design mavens, she's a revolutionary architect, and to 15-year-old Bee, she is a best friend and, simply, Mom.

Then Bernadette disappears. It began when Bee aced her report card and claimed her promised reward: a family trip to Antarctica. But Bernadette's intensifying allergy to Seattle—and people in general—has made her so agoraphobic that a virtual assistant in India now runs her most basic errands. A trip to the end of the earth is problematic.

To find her mother, Bee compiles email messages, official documents, secret correspondence—creating a compulsively readable and touching novel about misplaced genius and a mother and daughter's role in an absurd world.

Editor's Note

On the screen…

Maria Semple’s modern epistolary novel is hilarious and heartfelt, following 15-year-old Bee as she tries to solve the apparent mental breakdown and disappearance of her mother just before a family trip to Antarctica. The movie adaptation dropping this August stars Cate Blanchett, Emma Nelson, and Billy Crudup.

LanguageEnglish
Release dateAug 14, 2012
ISBN9781611134674
Unavailable
Where'd You Go, Bernadette: A Novel
Author

Maria Semple

Maria Semple is the founder and CEO of the Prospect Finder LLC. She is an experienced researcher, trainer, and frequent speaker on prospect research, e-mail marketing, and simple social media strategies. She consults with nonprofit organizations, financial services firms, and small businesses interested in finding their best prospects for long-term business relationships. She is a regular monthly contributor to the Tony Martignetti Nonprofit Radio Show, available on iTunes. Maria Semple previously authored two downloadable and interactive e-books, “Panning for Gold,” filled with dozens of prospecting resources. Maria’s firm is also a master certified constant contact solutions provider, assisting small-business owners and nonprofits with their e-mail marketing needs and social media strategies. Maria is a constant contact authorized local expert, enabling her to deliver seminars on leveraging the power of e-mail marketing and social media. Finally, as a LinkedIn evangelist, Maria helps nonprofits and small businesses understand how to use this free tool to increase visibility. Maria currently resides in New Jersey with her husband and two daughters. She actively volunteers with organizations in her local nonprofit community, including the Women’s Leadership Council of United Way of Northern New Jersey, Fairleigh Dickinson University, Financial Women’s Association, and Financial Planning Association of New Jersey. She dreams of a future surrounded by palm trees and sailing the Caribbean. Visit her website www.TheProspectFinder.com for free resources and additional information.

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Reviews for Where'd You Go, Bernadette

Rating: 3.97273838318611 out of 5 stars
4/5

3,283 ratings346 reviews

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  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Maybe I give out 5 stars too easily, but is that such a crime?

    I loved this book. Funny, quirky, juicy, interesting, relevant and sad.

    One of the best things about this book was how the author was able to make everyone so perfectly 3 dimensional. No character was sacrificed for the sake of the story's satire or humor. Everyone and everything will surprise you. It is truly pitch perfect.

    1 person found this helpful

  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a damn funny book and the settings and some of the characters are both spot on & one of a kind - great stuff - a dark comedy with a stage set so well for each scene and some very, very witty dialogue - the humor here breathes life into the triangle of the family relationship .
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a nice story about the relation between a teenager and her mother that is a woman that has to learn to find herself and the place that she has in the world. Is a fast read that is made in a epistolary way that allow us to discover that there is way more behind each of the characters that are in the book and how each of them need to learn to find their own place in the world and assume that their "perfect world" is not as perfect as it seems.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I enjoyed this quirky story following Bernadette’s trials and adventures told through her daughter B. Semple had a way of drawing me in and hating certain character. To me that’s a sign of a good author. I wasn’t a huge fan of the narrator, but sped up a bit helped. 4🌟
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    From my Cannonball Read V Review ...

    This book is popular among Cannonballers, and I get why. It's got a different structure, a bit of whimsy and focuses much of its hatred on my grungy / crunchy little hometown of Seattle. In fact, the only thing that made me interested in reading the book was the tie to Seattle. However, I think people who have either never visited the Pacific Northwest or have no animosity towards it will still enjoy the book.

    The book is told through some absurd narrative devices - the perspective of a middle school child, emails between neighbors and desperate private school marketers, investigators, magazine articles - but remains fairly coherent throughout. The main narrator is Bernadette's daughter, although we do get to view things from Bernadette's perspective as she communicates with her personal assistant (who is based in India - perhaps she got the idea from A.J. Jacobs's book?). Bernadette going missing, while ostensible the focus of the book, only happens about 2/3 of the way through, which allows us to build up the characters and learn a bit more about them.

    Without giving too much away, there is a whole lot of absurdity / unavailability throughout the book. From a super-last-minute trip to Antarctica to a bit of a deus ex machina ending, I definitely had to suspend disbelief numerous times. However, the details about Seattle were pretty spot on, so at least that wasn't distracting to me.

    I read this book over the course of two red-eye flights to Europe for my honeymoon. I was tired and not really interested in anything that taxed my brain too intensely. This book definitely fit the bill. Call it a beach read, or a plane read, or whatever. But I think it's worth adding to you 'when I need to turn off my brain but still feel like I'm using it' list.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Funny and smart and warm-hearted! Seattle wife, mom, and former architect, Bernadette, goes missing and the whole story unfolds via letters, emails, and FBI notes. Highly recommended - it'll be one of my favorites this year. It was a real treat.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Wow!!!! Wowowowowowow!!!

    I can't tell you about this book because you won't believe that the pieces could possibly work together. This book is amazing! The strange, wonderful parts come together into a beautiful, charming, touching whole. I love this book, and I will totally come back to it again.

    Just go read it. I don't know if everyone will love it, but it is totally worth the time to find out.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I'm sad it took me so long to read this...I plunged through this book. This book is the perfect mix of quirk, satire and ingenuity.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I found it uneven--some delightful, funny passages, some excellent suspense, mixed in with long boring passages when neither the writing nor the story held my interest. Not a bad read, but not a don't-miss-this.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I'd been wanting to read this for some time and finally I came up on the library wait list so I dove right in. Overall, I liked it quite a bit. 3.5 stars liked (how I wish awarding half stars were possible). The first third, well, I'll stretch that to half was my favorite while the back end lagged a bit for me and while the ending was solid and neat enough, I didn't quite feel it did its beginning justice. But it was tidy an end so I can't complain too vigorously. I did think Bernadette's was funny initially but when Elgin recounts her behaviour during the dinner they had out together and how she'd been over the past fifteen years, I began to feel that something more dangerous and clinical was going on with her than just the rantings of brilliant eccentric. I was worried for her and continued to be up to and through her "disappearance" so while I was relieved to discover her whereabouts, it seemed a tad obvious that that's where she'd gone. I give many points to the laughs I had by reading the messages between Soo-Lin and Audrey. Though their accounts of interactions were written as novelisation and didn't sound much like how people really relate their day to a friend, they were hilarious. By the end I felt more sympathetic to Audrey and I liked Soo-Lin less. Go figure. Everything about the Galer School, Ollie-O and Microsoft were funny and even when over the top, well done. I would definitely recommend this to anyone looking for a quick, fun weekend read or as a good one for those airport waits. It made me smile, laugh, roll my eyes, sometimes made me think and moved at a good clip. Well done.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    This was a fun quirky read! Although some of the characters are fairly annoying it just adds to the element of quirkiness. Many laugh out loud moments.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    One of those books I put off reading because it was too popular, but now I think it deserves the good reputation. The story of Bernadette Fox, a free spirit stifled by life in suburban Seattle. The only things that keep her semi sane are her 15 year old daughter Bee and her husband, Elgie, a Microsoft designer. When Bernadette's non-conformity goes a bit too far and her husband attempts a psychological "intervention," Bernadette pulls a fast one and vanishes. Some people believe that Bernadette has killed herself, but Bee doesn't believe her mother would abandon her. Bee must use her mother's emails and other correspondence to piece together the full story and try to find Bernadette. Not a deep book, but engaging. Raises the question of the line between non-conformity and mental illness although ultimately explaining away the difficult issues raised.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is the 2nd book that I have read by Semple who has been a Hollywood comedy writer prior to her turn as a novelist. This book was considered her best and I did enjoy it more that other book that I read(her latest). This is just a funny satirical novel that pokes fun at Seattle, Microsoft, and upper middle class people in general. The basic plot surrounds Bernadette a genius architect who with her Microsoft working husband fled L.A to Seattle after some career problems for Bernadette. The novel is written in a style that combines letters, emails, etc. along with narrative to create a good pacing. The details of the plot can be gotten elsewhere. Suffice to say that if you are looking for a funny escapist read, then try this out. I believe that this book will be a movie with Cate Blanchett in the lead role. Should be out next Spring.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Bernadette, Elgie & Bee. What a trio you are, swirling around in your own little orbits, colliding with each other and sometimes sharing the same orbits. Life was not dull, but some down time was definitely required (maybe not the involuntary admission to the looney bin, though.)Raced through the book, picked it up to check in on these guys every chance I got, until I finished it.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I brought a whole bag of books to the beach to read, but this one ended up taking up all my time. It was a good book, but I just couldn't get over the whiny tones and the air of superiority in many of the characters. I learned more than I ever cared to know about Seattle homeless, Antarctica, and LA architecture.

    It was still a good story though! I enjoyed the character of Bee the most (which I think most people will) and think having her be the one to put this whole story together makes this a playful read that some younger readers might even enjoy.

    One aspect of this story that did bother me though was that Bernadette is clearly mentally ill and she just somehow fixes herself. I don't think it works like that.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I admit it took me a bit to get into this one. It seemed rather random and rambling to start. I suppose that could be the fault of audio versus print, but eventually I got into it -- great reading by the narrator helped. And I stopped taking it seriously and allowed it to be outrageous: that also helped. Audrey Griffen drove me crazy! I think she was meant to. Soo-Lin, too.I especially enjoyed the whole portion that takes place on the Antartic Cruise. Too bad that wasn't longer.I was disappointed that a couple of loose ends weren't tied up in the end: how was the letter lost? and was SooLin actually pregnant? I am convinced it was an early menopausal misconception. (haha pun!)Slight spoiler alert as I mention an inconsistency: they find the notepad with imprints of the letter on the ship, but the letter contains information that happened AFTER Bernadette gets off the ship. Her letter could have been more succinct or the final events explained differently; it seemed like an abrupt yet long-winded conclusion.Certainly a fun read, and unique story, so worthwhile.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    An enjoyable novel from Maria Semple. Bernadette is a funny, tragic, admirable protagonist who has to search for herself after an event in her past leaves her psychologically vulnerable and depressed. Her character is joined by her husband and daughter who suffer through Bernadette's depression and help round out the plot.The novel is written in different points of view by the protagonists giving the plot a different voice and breaking up what could be just another monotonous 1st person delivery.A good read.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I almost didn't read this book for two reasons: 1) A condescending guy on the Internet whom I generally disagree with [EDIT: Not Jonathan Franzen; granted, he's a condescending guy, but he's not on the Internet much, and I agree with him about as often as I disagree with him] thought it was the best thing ever; and 2) Its cover is AWFUL. It makes it look like some kind of wacky chick-lit caper about shopping for sunglasses or some such nonsense. I thought the days of publishers slapping a chick-lit cover on anything written by a woman were gone, but clearly I was mistaken.

    But I was at the library yesterday with my nine-year-old picking up a book he'd requested, and he wanted to sit and read that book RIGHT THEN, so I pulled this one off the nearest shelf, figuring I'd read it for 10 minutes until he was ready to go. Instead, I ended up checking it out and reading it obsessively into the night and early this morning.

    There are plenty of reviews to tell you what it's about, so I'll just say: Don't pick it up expecting chick lit. That's not what this is, despite the cover. It's smart and funny (although readers from Seattle might feel otherwise), and I found it refreshingly unpredictable, but maybe I'm just not very good at predicting plots.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Best possible beach read - funniest book I've read in years
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the publisher in a Goodreads giveaway.

    Fabulous book! I loved the dry humor from the very first page. It came as no surprise to me that the author was a writer for Arrested Development. The story is creative and the characters are all engaging (if not always likeable).

    The ending was a little easy (decades of issues resolved just like that), but that's the only weakness I found in the story.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I have not laughed out loud and read passages so often from a book I always a long time. What a delight this was- I didn't want to put it down! I got Bernadette- so much about her spoke to me personally. I haven't found my South Pole station yet, but at least I'm looking.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Cute book. Easy to read.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the publisher in a Goodreads giveaway.

    Fabulous book! I loved the dry humor from the very first page. It came as no surprise to me that the author was a writer for Arrested Development. The story is creative and the characters are all engaging (if not always likeable).

    The ending was a little easy (decades of issues resolved just like that), but that's the only weakness I found in the story.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Fun & quirky, refreshingly different!
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    A fantastic book!
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    A fun reading romp!
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Best book I've heard on audio.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Great Book! Enjoyed reading it although at first the format seemed awkward. I quickly got past this and enjoyed the book. At times I felt sadness in the characters however I did end up enjoying the book and highly recommend it.
  • Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
    2/5
    I picked this novel for our December read as something light, yet funny, but engaging. I am disappointed, though, for a number of reasons. I don't mind the epistolary framework, except when Semple deviates from it. The characters are all unlikable, some more so than others. Bernadette is snarky in her observations of other people, completely lacking in compassion for the homeless and those in less fortunate circumstances than herself. The mother-daughter relationship could have been developed into something interesting, but nothing came of it. The latter half of the novel kind of falls apart as far as structure and any semblance of character arc for the major characters. Our group discussion will be interesting. I may be of a minority viewpoint.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I needed a light, fun read, and that is what I got here. I also got a book that manages to be emotional while still being funny.Semple tells the story of Bernadette and her family. Bernadette has a past she doesn't talk about, and a beautiful but falling-apart home she hides away in. But when Bernadette disappears, it is left to her daughter, Bee, to piece what happened together. Bee uses faxes, e-mails, websites, and articles, plus her own experiences, to tell her mother's story, and find her.