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The Best Christmas Pageant Ever
The Best Christmas Pageant Ever
The Best Christmas Pageant Ever
Ebook72 pages1 hour

The Best Christmas Pageant Ever

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars

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This year’s pageant is definitely like no other, but maybe that’s exactly what makes it so special.

Laughs abound in this bestselling Christmas classic by Barbara Robinson! The Best Christmas Pageant Ever follows the outrageous shenanigans of the Herdman siblings, or “the worst kids in the history of the world.”

The siblings take over the annual Christmas pageant in a hilarious yet heartwarming tale involving the Three Wise Men, a ham, scared shepherds, and six rowdy kids. You and your family will laugh along with this funny story, perfect for independent reading or read-aloud sharing.

Ralph, Imogene, Leroy, Claude, Ollie, and Gladys Herdman are an awful bunch. They set fire to Fred Shoemaker’s toolshed, blackmailed Wanda Pierce to get her charm bracelet, and smacked Alice Wendelken across the head. And that’s just the start! When the Herdmans show up at church for the free snacks and suddenly take over the Christmas pageant, the other kids are shocked.

It’s obvious that they’re up to no good. But Christmas magic is all around and the Herdmans, who have never heard the Christmas story before, start to reimagine it in their own way.

LanguageEnglish
PublisherHarperCollins
Release dateFeb 22, 2011
ISBN9780062076939
Author

Barbara Robinson

Barbara Robinson has written several popular books for children, including My Brother Louis Measures Worms, The Best School Year Ever, The Best Halloween Ever, and the enormously popular bestselling novel The Best Christmas Pageant Ever, first published in 1972, which was made into a classic TV movie and on which this book was based. The play The Best Christmas Pageant Ever is produced annually in theaters, schools, and churches all over the world. Ms. Robinson has two daughters and three grandchildren.

Read more from Barbara Robinson

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Rating: 4.303571428571429 out of 5 stars
4.5/5

112 ratings43 reviews

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  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I have always loved this book! It's just so sweet and well-written! I read it every year at Christmas!
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    My jewish son likes it! He is only five years old!
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    This is our favourite Christmas book with my son.
    Anybody knows what is "Amazing Comics" and "Mighty Marvo", what is yelled by Gladys in the book (instead of the Angel of the God who proclaims the good news to the shepherds)??? I found a band with this name, but maybe it is a character in a comics?
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I’m reading this in school in 4 grade and we have read 1 cuss word how much is there Barbra?
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Audio book performed by Elaine Stritch

    The six Herdman kids are a handful – and then some. Their father disappeared a few years ago, their mother works a double shift, and the children are pretty much left to their own devices. They lie, steal, smoke cigars, hit little kids, cuss their teachers, and even set fire to a tool shed.

    When they show up at Sunday school (because the thought there would be snacks) just as the Christmas Pageant is being cast, they quickly take over. No one else will volunteer to take a major role for fear of being attacked by the Herdmans, so Imogene will be Mary, Ralph will play Joseph, the other Herdman boys will be the kings, and Gladys will be the Angel of the Lord – the only speaking part.

    Imagine if you had never heard the story of Jesus's birth, what would you think? First the Herdman's are appalled that people put a pregnant woman in a barn. Then they are enraged that Herod would be plotting to kill a little baby. And what's with the “wadded-up clothes” they wrapped the baby in?

    Imogene's Mary is fiercely protective of her innocent baby. The kings decide to bring a much better present than stupid, scented oil. And the Angel of the Lord yells so EVERYONE knows: “Hey! Unto you a Child is born!” And everyone is moved by the wonder and joy of Christmas.

    Elaine Stritch does a great job narrating the audio. However, the version I had skipped the first chapter, which really introduces the Herdman's. I'm glad I had the text as well, so I could read that myself. The text also includes wonderful illustrations by Judith Gwyn Brown.

  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This book just never goes away. It's the kind of book I've seen in every crevice of my school and on every list imaginable. I think I once was tempted to throw out 10 of them because they seem to multiply like rabbits. Finally, my son is reading it in his 4th grade classroom and he's spoken of it fondly, and I thought to myself, Hey, I could, like, READ it...... So far, it's cute and I'll finish it tonight. We'll see! I may have even thrown those out...I hope not.

    Update: I now see why this book is in every classroom by the dozen, and due to the cover and my own first impression, I see why it's the type of book that doesn't get read much. How unfortunate! This was a laugh-out-loud delight that I may just read every year. It'd make a great made-for-tv movie. If there is one, I'm going to have to get ahold of it.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    A cute story about a bunch of mean kids who decided to take over a church's Christmas pageant. What results is not only a transformation of those mean kids, but a new lesson for the whole church on the meaning of Christmas.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    My favorite Christmas story. Just gets better every year. Humor and changes of heart
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Writing: 4.0Theme: 4.0Content: 4.0Language: 4.5Overall: 4.0; This story shares the adventures of the Herdman clan. This misfit group of children are unkind, ill-mannered, and disrespectful, but they soon learn (a little) about the love of God through Christ. While it isn't real strong in its Christian content it does share the birth of Christ. After Mrs. George Armstrong (the yearly Pageant planner) breaks a leg (no pun intended) and is not able to conduct this years play. Mother (mother of the narrator) is called upon to put the rag tag bunch of children to perform the pageant. Many problems persist as the only ones that are enthusiastic about involvement is the Herdman children. In the end there is hope. The author does use some crude humor at times in getting across her point (even while most of the time it comes from one of the Herdman's). Recommend. ***December 24, 2014***
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    The Herdmans are pretty much the worst bunch of kids you can imagine -- so when they show up at church and decide to take over the annual Nativity pageant, everyone braces for disaster. However, when you take away the routines and expectations surrounding that stale annual event and replace them with the unexpected, the result is surprisingly touching. In fact, you might just end up with the best Christmas pageant ever.This is a sweet and funny story, and a quick read. Despite showing its age in spots (mostly when it mentions prices of certain items), it's still a perennial favorite.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    It is a funny, playful story about a Christmas Pageant that happens in a community every year. This year the pageant was a little different after being taken over by the 6 wild hellions in the Herdman family. It is a reminder about the wonderment of the Christmas miracle that some of us may take for granted. I enjoyed this quick read and will look forward to reading it with my kids next year.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    This is a story about a family with six children. They were known as the worst children on earth. However, the Herdman family has something strange happen when they went to church; they got interested in the Christmas pageant. Since they are so very rude and disrespectful no one says anything when they take the lead roles. Everyone thinks it will be a disaster, but much too every one’s surprise it turns out to be The Best Christmas Pageant Ever.This is a very good book. It has a lot of humor, but tells a wonderful story. Although others may not agree the story of the Lord is very compelling and tends to change many people just as it did the Herdman kids.1.This would be a great book to bring up during judging and safety. Many of the people judged the Herdman kids, and they proved others wrong. Also this can be used in safety. The teacher can ask the students to pin point unsafe things around the classroom and what they can do to fix it.2.Since this is over a pageant/ play it would be a great book to read before asking the students to create their own play.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    very fun but sends out a bit of a wrong message.

    1 person found this helpful

  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I love this book. I was introduced to it when Mrs. Stewart read it to my second grade class, and I've adored it ever since, though only recently, during an episode of insomnia, did I fully rediscover its goodness. I love how it brings out the earthiness, messiness, mystery, and beauty of the Incarnation in a totally non-preachy way. Theological without trying too hard to be; funny and touching.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Originally published in 1972, this brief children's novel - the first of three stories concerning the horrible Herdman children, it was followed by The Best School Year Ever, and The Best Halloween Ever - is a humorous and heartwarming exploration of the true meaning of Christmas. Detailing the depredations of Ralph, Imogene, Leroy, Claude, Ollie and Gladys Herdman - six siblings who "were the absolutely worst kids in the history of the world," who lied and stole and smoked cigars (even the girls) and talked dirty and hit little kids and cussed their teachers and took the name of the Lord in vain and set fire to Fred Shoemaker's old broken-down toolhouse" - our (unnamed) young narrator relates the chaos and confusion which ensues when the town's juvenile delinquents decide to participate in her church's Christmas pageant, despite never having heard the Christmas story before, and not really belonging to any church. Their unorthodox behavior, and somewhat unconventional approach to the Nativity story stirs up all the expected controversy, but also leads more than one person to reexamine the well-known tale in a new, and more thoughtful light...I'm not sure why I never picked The Best Christmas Pageant Ever up, when I was a girl - I certainly recall seeing it, at various times, during the holidays - but I am glad I finally gave it a chance. Robinson really nails some of the characters one might meet in a church community - the sanctimonious prigs, like Alice Wendleken and her mother; the overly competent, managing do-it-alls, like Mrs. George Armstrong; the patient minister, aka the "bureau of complaints" - and her sense of humor shines throughout. I particularly appreciated the fact that the Herdmans are revealed, not as little monsters, but as very human children, without their ever being "reformed," or changed in any fundamental sense, in their bad behavior. This really emphasizes, to my way of thinking, the importance of seeing the divine in our fellow human beings, even when we don't particularly like them, or when they just aren't that likable. What better message than this, for Christmas?
  • Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
    2/5
    The wonderful novel does not translate as well into a compressed picture book-length story.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Title: The Best Christmas Pageant Ever
    Author: Barbara Robinson
    Genre: Young Adult
    Challenges: 101 Books in 1001 Days Challenge, Series Challenge Season 3, A to Z Reading Challenge, 2009 Support Your Local Library, 20 Books in 2009, Pages Read Challenge, 2009 YA Challenge, Summer Vacation Reading Challenge 2009, The Four Month Challenge, Take A chance Challenge, Christmas in July, Summer Reading Challenge 2009,

    Rating: 3/5
    No. of Pages: 128
    Published: 2005 (1988)

    From the back: the Herdmans are the worst kids in the history of the world. They lie, steal, smoke cigars, swear, and hit little kids. So no one is prepared when this out-law family invades church one Sunday and decides to take over the annual Christmas pageant.
    None of the Heardmans has ever heard the Christmas story before. Their interpretation of the tale – the Wise Men are a bunch of dirty spies and Herod needs a good beating – has a lot of people up in arms. But it will make this year’s pageant the most unusual anyone has seen and, just possibly, the best one ever.

    Mine: It’s amazing how kids that know the story can interpret the story. Through the Herdmans innocent (well maybe not so innocent) eyes – the true story of the Christmas can come to light.


  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    The Herdmen's are meanest kids in town. No one wants them anywhere near the Christmas pageant, but no one has the guts to keep them away either. Which may turn out for the best. After all, sometimes we all need a fresh perspective on the familiar.
  • Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
    2/5
    A good little story. As a Children's book however, I don't know that I would recommend this one. The Author billed it as a comedy about a Christmas Pageant that this town was having. I didn't really see it that way.

    This small town has a Christmas Pageant every year. Every year the Pageant is this same. Except for this year. This is the story that is told through the eyes of one of the Children, who was nameless. He and his family attended the Christmas Pageant every year. This year however, the woman who normally produced the Pageant fell ill and so the main character's mom had to take over.

    Here's the monkey wrench. There are these group of kids who are called the Herdmans. Described as the rowdiest group of delinquents imaginable. Ranging in ages 7 to 13, these kids bullied, destroyed public property, smoked cigars, cussed. If you can name a vice, the Herdman children were probably at the center of it. And no one in the town really wanted to deal with them.

    So when the main character's mom got involved, she decided to get the Herdman children involved with the pageant as well.

    I guess that the nice thing about this story is that the ending was somewhat unexpected. I am not going to divulge anything here towards it for you folks that don't want spoilers. But getting through the story is annoying. Especially when the description of the Herdman Children were concerned. As a parent, I kinda wanted to take them each and beat the shit out of them!

    If you are also into the religious thing, you will enjoy this book. For me? Not one of my favorites by a long shot.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This book is about a family of “absolutely the worst kids in the history of the world”. The Herdman children (all six of them) have made a name for themselves by being as horrible to others as they are to themselves. However, something strange happens when they go to church expecting free food and goodies: they get extremely interested in the Christmas pageant. Since they are so very intimidating, no one speaks up when the Herdman children offer to take all the lead roles. The whole church community is convinced that it will be a disaster. Despite many shenanigans and mistakes, the Herdmans show genuine interest in the story of Jesus. In the end, the children were touched by the story and it ended up being The Best Christmas Pageant Ever.I loved this book. It was one of my very favorites as a child. I really enjoyed the humor and the story-telling. The author tells lots of small, humorous tales to give the reader some insight into how horrible the Herdmans really are. There are lots of cute jokes and some slightly shocking situations that keep the reader interested. What I liked best, however, was the theme of the book. I liked the idea that everyone is good inside and it is never too late to be introduced to the story of Jesus. Classroom Extension Ideas:1.Clearly, the Herdman children have no real regard for safety (like burning down a toolshed because they were lighting a chemistry set on fire) so this might be a good way to introduce that topic to the class. The teacher could get out a large pad of paper and ask the class to list the things they remembered the Herdmans doing that were unsafe. Why were they unsafe? What would you do if you saw something like that happening?2.Let the children put on their own Christmas Pageant. Let them read the story of Jesus and write their own script to act out for their classmates. They can even plan their costumes and set ideas.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Unfair of me to give it 4 stars when my child self may've given it 5. But oh well. When she shows up and tells me to change it, I will. Right after I ask her where her time machine is.Rudolph is my favorite Christmas television special, and this may be my favorite Christmas book. Though there are a few other good ones.The Herdmans are the horrible kids who live down the street like wild creatures. They do everything sweet, adorable, law-abiding kids don't. And they don't go to church. Until they're lured there with rumors of yummy food. And so somehow they also end up in the Christmas pageant. Which naturally is going to ruin it completely!I don't know if I first saw this on television or read the book. I suspect the book came second for me. And I was appalled to find the Tivo had no record of the television movie!! So I had to break down and buy it on DVD.The story is aimed at kids, middle grade perhaps, or slightly younger even. It's told in first person and the way it's written reminded me of Roald Dahl or the first Harry Potter book. Though perhaps not quite as well as either. Close though.It's funny and it tells a Christian message without being too annoying about it.My one quibble is that the narrator, who's a girl whose mother is running the pageant, relays some information and conversations that I can't figure out how she heard about them. I had to suspend my disbelief a little there.Nice, shortish book for anyone who's sick of Santa Claus stories. (I never am. Santa and the North Pole are totally awesome.) True meaning of Christmas, yadda yadda.Oh, it turns out there's a whole series of books about the Herdmans! Why did I never know this? And do I want to read them, or risk being disappointed and having a Christmas memory ruined?Indecision.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    If you have never met the Herdmans, boy are you missing out. This book tells the story of Beth’s experiences and observations of the Herdmans, a tough family of misfits that hijack a town. When the Herdman’s realized that they could get treats at Sunday school, they decided that they would try it out. Once there they decided to take over the Christmas Pagent. This is a delightful tale that 3rd-5th graders will love. It is funny, but has heart.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Robinson, B. (1972). The Best Christmas Pageant Ever. New York: HarperTrophy.80 pages.Appetizer: The Herdmans are the worst kids in town. They smoke cigars, cause trouble in their classes, lie steal and they burned down Mr. Shoemaker's toolhouse (which really worked for them, since they got to steal the police's doughnuts).It's all Charlie's fault that they wound up involved in the Christmas Pageant though. The six Herdman children attend church, for the first time ever, looking for extra snacks because of what Charlie said and they wound up auditioning for the pageant because they love movies. The Herdmans intemidate (or take unwanted roles) and end up with all of the leads in the play.The pageant may never be the same.Yet another classic book I never managed to pick up when I was a kid. (I also don't think I ever watched the made for TV movie. Is that something I should try to hunt down on Netflix, FBDR?) I actually don't think I'd ever heard of The Best Christmas Pageant Ever. But one of my students reviewed it last quarter and it seemed fun enough that I wanted to pick it up for myself. Little do my students know, I steal book ideas from them aaaaaall the time. (Except I tell them that. I'm horrible at keeping secrets.)The Best Christmas Pageant Ever is very fun. It made me laugh several times and put me in the holiday spirit (which is what I was going for. YAY!). It's a fast read and would probably make a good pre-Christmas read aloud, for both kids who haven't heard the nativity story before and for those who are so familiar with it they have it memorized, zzzzzzzzzzzzz.I did have trouble turning off my teacher eyes as I was reading though. The Herdmans' father abandoned them. Their mother works two jobs (but turned down some welfare money because she'd rather work than spend time with her children). The kids only pass their classes because the teachers don't want to deal with them for a second year (in which case, they'd also have a younger Herdman brother or sister to also deal with). Reading all of that made me want to be the siblings' teacher (but possibly not all at once) and, I don't know, intimidate the shiz out of them or something. No, probably a teacher would have to go a more mothering route...and be super vigilant so he or she wouldn't end up with a surprise clump of worms in his/her pockets or hair. I'd try a number of different tactics....You see what I mean! I couldn't turn off the teacher perspective and just enjoy the book. But it all ended up being okay, because those kids were super-curious about the story of Jesus, and helped their classmates and town to see the story in a new light.As I was reading, there was some dated language and some dated gender roles, but I was very interested in the narrator. Robinson uses an unnamed narrator to tell the story. It reminded me of The Great Gatsby, in that both have a secondary character sharing the story. Also, it was particularly fun reading this after having read about this experience with the nativity play over at Hyperbole and a Half. Enjoy!Dinner Conversation:"The Herdmans were absolutely the worst kids in the history of the world. They lied and stole and smoked cigars (even the girls) and talked dirty and hit little kids and cussed their teachers and took the name of the Lord in vain and set fire to Fred Shoemaker's old broken-down toohouse.The toolhouse burned right down to the ground, and I think that surprised the Herdmans. They set fire to things all the time, but that was the first time they managed to burn down a whole building" (p. 1)."They were just so all-around awful you could hardly believe they were real: Ralph, Imogene, Leroy, Claude, Ollie, and Gladys--six skinny, stringy-haired kids all alike except for being different sizes and having different black-and-blue places where they had clonked each other.They lived over a garage at the bottom of Sproul Hill. Nobody used the garage anymore, but the Herdmans used to bang the door up and down just as fast as they could and try to squash one another--that was their idea of a game. Where other people had grass in their front yard, the Herdmans had rocks. And where other people had hydrangea bushes, the Herdmans had poison ivy" (p. 4)."Mother didn't expect to have anything to do with the Christmas pageant except to make me and my little brother Charlie be in it (we didn't want to) and to make my father go and see it (he didn't want to). Every year he said the same thing--"I've seen the Christmas pageant.""You haven't seen this year's Christmas pageant," Mother would tell him. "Charlie is a shepherd this year.""Charlie was a shepherd last year. No...you go on and go. I'm just going to put on my bathrobe and sit by the fire and relax. There's never anything different about the Christmas pageant.""There's something different this year," Mother said."What?""Charlie is wearing your bathrobe" (pp. 15-16).Tasty Rating: !!!
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    A heart-warming story about a bunch of wild kids who come to church and get involved with the Christmas pageant. It changes their lives and it changes their community.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    The Herdman children were notorious for being the terror of their town - all the children were known to beat up on other children, set fires, and cause ruckus among their neighborhood. The children smoked cigars and stole from others. Even their mother constantly works overtime just so she could avoid them. As a twist, it was to everyone's surprise that the Herdman children decide to participate in the annual church's Christmas Pageant. It turned out that one of the children, Leroy, learns that the church offers free food and refreshments at their services, and when all the Herdman children come to church and learn about the Nativity story - they were completely amazed, wanted to learn more, and be in the Christmas Pageant. The narrator's mother, who was in charge of the pageant for the first time was motivated to run the pageant and was willing and patient enough to work with the Herdman children, as many had doubted her and how the Herdmans would turn out. To some, the pageant turned out less than ideal, with the oldest, Imogene, wearing big golden hoop earrings, looking haggard, and carrying baby Jesus over her shoulder; her little sister Gladys yelling, "Hey! Onto you Christ is born;" and one of the Herdman boys, Ralph, playing one of the three wise men and bringing a gift of ham instead of myrrh. However, to the narrator, a young girl in Imogene's class, the pageant is more real than ever, as the Herdman children, "had improved the pageant a lot, just by doing what came naturally--like burping the baby...or thinking a ham would make a better present than a lot of perfumed oil."The book, although humorous for the most part, sends a clear message about the sad reality of neglected children - how people can be judgmental and dismissive of the children's needs, and that most of the time, what children in neglected environments require is for people to be emphatic, understanding, and patient with them, as the narrator and her family were to the Herdmans. This book is a great read for children ages 9-12 and teaches an effective lesson about the experiences of children in challenging family situations. Great read for the holidays as well, as it begs the question about the "true" meaning of Christmas.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    The Best Christmas Pageant Ever is funny and at the heart of it has a good message in acceptance and kindness. Young readers will be engaged throughout the entire story by the wild antics of the Herdman kids and how they take over a church Christmas pageant. The Herdman children are liars, stealers, cheaters, bullies and are known for causing mischief in their community. When they decided to attend Sunday School for the refreshments, they learn of the Christmas pageant and are determined to star in the play, even if that means bullying their way to the lead parts. The church community is rattled by the presences of the children and are sure that they will ruin the annual Christmas play. In the end, the pageant turns out to be the best one ever, largely impart because of the Herdmans who learn the Christmas story for the first time. Barbara Robinson's writing flows through event after event in a straight forward way, making this realistic fiction book an easy read. The characters are identifiable and everyone has encountered a Herdman in their life. The Best Christmas Pageant Ever is considered a classic in its own right. The story is timeless and would make for a great read during the month of December. I would caution that this story does outline the birth of Jesus through the Christian viewpoint. Age Appropriate: 3rd to 5th Grade
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    A true classic -- funny, great characters, great message and heartwarming. One to read again and again every year. Read it to your kids and enjoy it yourself. Highly recommended.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This a book that is good to read to a classroom to teacher them that if they are nice to other children that might seem mean then they might be surprised if the children are actually good. I recommend this book to every teacher to read to there students in the month of December.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Read this in fifth grade, what a silly wonderful fantastic holiday read.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    A hilarious uproarious story set in the Carolinas, time indeterminate. When the town bullies, who've never been to Church, or Sunday School, and who know nothing about the Christmas Story, decide to take over the annual Sunday school church pageant, the story of Jesus is presented in quite a different format. A quick read, but one that is quite profound in its message.

Book preview

The Best Christmas Pageant Ever - Barbara Robinson

Chapter 1

The Herdmans were absolutely the worst kids in the history of the world. They lied and stole and smoked cigars (even the girls) and talked dirty and hit little kids and cussed their teachers and took the name of the Lord in vain and set fire to Fred Shoemaker’s old broken-down toolhouse.

The toolhouse burned right down to the ground, and I think that surprised the Herdmans. They set fire to things all the time, but that was the first time they managed to burn down a whole building.

I guess it was an accident. I don’t suppose they woke up that morning and said to one another, Let’s go burn down Fred Shoemaker’s toolhouse . . . but maybe they did. After all, it was a Saturday, and not much going on.

It was a terrific fire—two engines and two police cars and all the volunteer firemen and five dozen doughnuts sent up from the Tasti-Lunch Diner. The doughnuts were supposed to be for the firemen, but by the time they got the fire out the doughnuts were all gone. The Herdmans got them—what they couldn’t eat they stuffed in their pockets and down the front of their shirts. You could actually see the doughnuts all around Ollie Herdman’s middle.

I couldn’t understand why the Herdmans were hanging around the scene of their crime. Everybody knew the whole thing was their fault, and you’d think they’d have the brains to get out of sight.

One fireman even collared Claude Herdman and said, Did you kids start this fire, smoking cigars in that toolhouse?

But Claude just said, We weren’t smoking cigars.

And they weren’t. They were playing with Leroy Herdman’s Young Einstein chemistry set, which he stole from the hardware store, and that was how they started the fire.

Leroy said so. We mixed all the little powders together, he said, and poured lighter fluid around on them and set fire to the lighter fluid. We wanted to see if the chemistry set was any good.

Any other kid—even a mean kid—would have been a little bit worried if he stole $4.95 worth of something and then burned down a building with it. But Leroy was just mad because the chemistry set got burned up along with everything else before he had a chance to make one or two bombs.

The fire chief got us all together—there were fifteen or twenty kids standing around watching the fire—and gave us a little talk about playing with matches and gasoline and dangerous things like that.

I don’t say that’s what happened here, he told us. "I don’t know what happened here, but that could have been it, and you see the result. So let this be a good lesson to you, boys and girls."

Of course it was a great lesson to the Herdmans—they learned that wherever there’s a fire there will be free doughnuts sooner or later.

I guess things would have been different if they’d burned down, say, the Second Presbyterian Church instead of the toolhouse, but the toolhouse was about to fall down anyway. All the neighbors had pestered Mr. Shoemaker to do something about it because it looked so awful and was sure to bring rats. So everybody said the fire was a blessing in disguise, and even Mr. Shoemaker said it was a relief. My father said it was the only good thing the Herdmans ever did, and if they’d known it was a good thing, they wouldn’t have done it at all. They would have set fire to something else . . . or somebody.

They were just so all-around awful you could hardly believe they were real: Ralph, Imogene, Leroy, Claude, Ollie, and Gladys—six skinny, stringy-haired kids all alike except for being different sizes and having different black-and-blue places where they had clonked each other.

They lived over a garage at the bottom of Sproul Hill. Nobody used the garage anymore, but the Herdmans used to bang the door up and down just as fast as they could and try to squash one another—that was their idea of a game. Where other people had grass in their front yard, the Herdmans had rocks. And where other people had hydrangea bushes, the Herdmans had poison ivy.

There was also a sign in the yard that said BEWARE OF THE CAT.

New kids always laughed about that till they got a look at the cat. It was the meanest-looking animal I ever saw. It had one short leg and a broken tail and one missing eye, and the mailman wouldn’t deliver anything to the Herdmans because of it.

I don’t think it’s a regular cat at all, the mailman told my father. I think those kids went up in the hills and caught themselves a bobcat.

Oh, I don’t think you can tame a wild bobcat, my father said.

I’m sure you can’t, said the mailman. "They’d

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