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Cheaper by the Dozen
Cheaper by the Dozen
Cheaper by the Dozen
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Cheaper by the Dozen

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars

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The #1 New York Times–bestselling classic: A hilarious memoir of two parents, twelve kids, and “a life of cheerfully controlled chaos” (The New York Times).

Translated into more than fifty languages, Cheaper by the Dozen is the unforgettable story of the Gilbreth clan as told by two of its members. In this endearing, amusing memoir, siblings Frank Jr. and Ernestine capture the hilarity and heart of growing up in an oversized family.

Mother and Dad are world-renowned efficiency experts, helping factories fine-tune their assembly lines for maximum output at minimum cost. At home, the Gilbreths themselves have cranked out twelve kids, and Dad is out to prove that efficiency principles can apply to family as well as the workplace.
 
The heartwarming and comic stories of the jumbo-size Gilbreth clan have delighted generations of readers, and will keep you and yours laughing for years.
 
This ebook features an illustrated biography including rare photos from the authors’ estates.
   
LanguageEnglish
Release dateNov 5, 2013
ISBN9781480457072
Cheaper by the Dozen
Author

Frank B. Gilbreth

Frank B. Gilbreth Jr. (1911–2001) served as a lieutenant commander in the US Navy during World War II, earning the Bronze Star and Air Medal for his valor in the campaigns in the South Pacific. After the war, he worked for the Post and Courier of Charleston, South Carolina, as a columnist and reporter. His books include How to Be a Father and Time Out for Happiness, and the classics Cheaper by the Dozen and Belles on Their Toes, both coauthored with his sister Ernestine Gilbreth Carey. In 1950, Frank and Ernestine Gilbreth were corecipients of the French International Humor Award for Cheaper by the Dozen. 

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Rating: 4.3538461538461535 out of 5 stars
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  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    In my first management course in graduate school I learned about scientific management and motion study. This wasn’t my first introduction to Frank Gilbreth, Sr., and Lillian Moller Gilbreth, though. I had already met them as the parents of a dozen children through the memoir written by two of their children and the movie based on the book. It’s been long enough since I’ve read the book that it was a fresh experience for me. The brother and sister who co-authored the book tell stories from their childhood episodically rather than chronologically. They write of parents and siblings with genuine affection. Many of the stories are laugh-out-loud funny. I had a happy childhood myself, and yet I found myself wishing I could have been among the Gilbreth dozen.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    For students who enjoy historical, realistic fiction, it doesn't get much better (or funnier) than Cheaper by the Dozen. This is the true story of a family of twleve children, run by scientific parents, in the 1910s and 20s. Some of the chapters are so funny that kids will find themselves crying out of laughter. This is a book probably best for 4th and 5th grade readers, but again, one that probably anyone would enjoy.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I have some very fond memories of reading this book about a decade ago in the seventh grade. At the time I found it to be hilarious and a large part of me longed for a family with so many siblings. It's funny what time can do to alter your perspective. This time while I was reading this novel I wasn't struck so much by how funny it was. Instead I found myself gathering parenting tips and ideas for helping children learn. While I still enjoyed myself, the entertainment factor had decrease substantially since my first read. It's nice to know though that some book have the ability to grow with you.

    The only reason I have this at a 3 instead of a 4 is simply because I found myself trudging along waiting for it to just end already.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Great book!
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    tales of growing up in a large, loving family. Americana at its finest.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a classic, based upon the lives of the Gilbreth family from the early 1900s.Dad is an efficiency expert, and brings his work into his home, which consists of his wife and dozen children. The story of their lives is told by two of the oldest children, and is full of love, humor and pathos.Forget any movie, this book is a delight to read, and reread.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This was a delightful, nonfiction reread. It is the biography of the family of Frank and Lillian Gilbreth, pioneers of time and labour saving engineering. They had twelve children, which was about as horrifying to many back then as it is to many today, and the eccentricities of their dad combined with the energy and imagination of twelve children gave plenty of humorous and inciteful fodder for this book, which was co-written by two of the children.

  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Hilarious, one of my favorite books when I was growing up.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Cheaper by the Dozen is probably one of the books I've had the most fun reading. This is the story of Frank Gilbreth, his wife, and their twelve children around the turn of the 20th century. It's an account, written by two of the twelve children, of the many interesting and humorous events that they witnessed growing up in such a large family. Family life is made even more enjoyable by their extremely unique father who was a pioneer of motion-study, and who did such things as covering the walls of their home with lessons about astronomy, Morse code, etc.

    In real life, Frank Gilbreth was the foremost expert in the country on motion study and its effects. Transferring this knowledge to his home life, Frank attempted to raise his twelve children according to his own unique set of rules and regulations. The result was sometimes catastrophic, sometimes brilliant, and always funny. These twelve lively kids make the book fun to read and I loved the variety of stories that made their lives memorable. Every child is so unique and by the end of the book, I really felt that I was part of the family.

    I've probably read this book a half dozen times over the past fifty years. It's serious, funny, and sad in some places. I found this charming story to be captivating, motivational, heartwarming, and humorous. There are so many hilarious anecdotes I was constantly in laughter and tears. The book is full of humorous events including family trips in the car which always caused people to stare, family council meetings, and one of the most memorable, a visit from a woman representing birth control who had no idea how large the family was. I highly recommend this wonderful story about an interesting real-life family.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    The parents of Frank and Ernestine make an interesting couple. She is a psychologist and he is a motion study engineer. Together, they work to make processes more efficient for various business and by default, their twelve children are efficiency aficionados. Why twelve children? As Mr. Gilbreth explains, they were "cheaper by the dozen." It's a running joke in the family. Be forewarned, the family has a lot of running jokes.An example of making a process more efficient: Mr. Gilbreth evaluated surgeons during operations to make their procedures go smoother.While the bulk of Gilbreth's story is humorous, it must be said that at the time of writing no one thought it politically or socially incorrect to call a Native American a "red indian." I don't want to give too much away, but the birth control scene was hysterical. I couldn't help but laugh out loud more than once. And I don't think it is a spoiler alert to say that I loved the ending. Mother Gilbreth steps fearlessly into her husband's shoes and carries on the family business. Brilliant.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Cheaper by the dozen, by Frank Gilbreth Jr., Tells the story of Frank and Lillian Gilbreth and there twelve children. The Gilbreths were efficiency experts and advised mainly industrial plants. The story focuses on the home life of the Gilberths before Frank Gilberth’s death. He attempted to adapt his efficiency techniques to house hold life. He employed efficiency techniques to things such as: meals, bathing, and studying. He wanted the children to skip as many grades as possible through efficiency. I would use excerpts of this book on the use of motion studies in industry.As the author was present for the events of the book I would say that most of the material is not made up. However, as some time past between the events of the book and when it was written, his memory was probably somewhat hazy. Consequently, some of the dialog is probably made up. As to information, the events are factual and have been verified through industrial and school records, and interviews with other Gilberth children. The structure of the book is topical and chronological. The book is all narrative text. It tells the story of the Gilberth family. There is minimal expository text. There is some explanation on efficiency techniques but that is all. There are many literary devices employed by the author. He uses: diction, metaphor and telling details to tell the story of the Gilberths. The book has a strong author’s voice. The book has the characteristic style of Frank Gilberth Jr. writing. There is a very small amount of front material, a forward and a preface. However, there is no back material. There is also no visual material the book is completely textual.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Cheaper by the Dozen is a tongue in cheek memoir by Frank Gilbreth Junior and his sister Ernestine Gilbreth Carey. These siblings were just two of the twelve children that their parents raised. Frank Gilbreth Senior and his wife, Lillian Moller Gilbreth were efficiency experts who raised their 12 children in a large house in Montclair, New Jersey. The book takes a humorous look at the unusual child raising methods of Frank Gilbreth. He believed in a hands on approach and in working closely with his wife in order to guide his children. They worked well together even though they were polar opposites.Frank believed that his efficiency methods that were effective in the workplace could also work well with the children. He taught his children to type, speak different languages, learn math shortcuts and, to readily allow themselves to be guinea pigs for many of his ideas. Although his methods often fell short or ended in hilarity, one thing that came across clearly was the love both of these parents had for each other and their family.Cheaper by the Dozen is an enjoyable and nostalgic look back at yesteryear. The children were raised during the 1920’s and the book was originally published in 1948. I have seen the charming film version starring Clifton Webb and Myrna Loy. Apparently many of the events described in the book actually did happen, but the authors used artistic license to enhance the episodes. It is interesting to note that Lillian, in addition to giving birth and raising these children, had a degree in psychology, and worked as one of the first female engineers. I found Cheaper By the Dozen to be a pleasurable read and I look forward to picking up the sequel, Belles on Their Toes in the future.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    This was a really excellent story about an efficiency expert and his massive family. He came up with all manner of ways to teach his twelve children - everything from language records while they brushed their teeth to morse code written on the walls of the bathroom. Their father's escapades didn't end there, and the book is filled with stories about all the crazy things he did (very often in the name of efficiency). The stories are well written and funny.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    A yellowed paperback copy of this book made its way from my Mom's shelves to mine back when I was a teen and on a serious classics kick but I hadn't picked it up before now. Discussing the book with her this weekend, I learned that she'd bought it for school and didn't like it much. My opinion didn't vary from hers. Two of the elder of the Gilbreth siblings write this memoir of their years growing up in a family of twelve children in the early 1900s, but the primary focus of the memoir is their father. With strong opinions and a large personality, you can tell from the tone of the text that these children adore the memory of their father but as an outside observer, he comes across as a bit of jerk. A motion study engineer (essentially he consulted as an efficiency expert for mostly factories, reducing the number of motions workers needed to make for a job), I'll give him credit for making his wife an equal partner in his professional life. But his views on child-rearing were a bit bizarre and while they were effective, he'd give some modern helicopter parents a run for their money. With far fewer anecdotes of the hijinks the children got up to in such a large family, the narrative wasn't quite what I expected. The writing is also a product of its time with several moments of casual racism. My biggest takeaway was the boggling fact that the Gilbreths had twelve children in seventeen years (with no multiple births) and that Frank Gilbreth senior passed away when the youngest was two years old. I'd be far more fascinated to read a tale of Lillian Gilbreth single parenting all those children. Not recommended.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I read this book because I love the movie by the same name. Of course, I refer to the movie starring Clifton Webb and not the cheap remake with Steve Martin. I wanted to love this book and, in fact, I did love this book, but one thing kept me from giving it 5 stars. I could not get past the subtle (or not so subtle) racism from the mother. She had a habit of saying when something or somebody was unsavoury or dirty, that they were being "Eskimo". I know that the time of this book was the early 20th century and that this kind of racism was common and acceptable but today it is not and it left me with a mild distaste for the book as a result.That aside, this book nicely tells about an amazing family headed by a remarkable man and woman who were ahead of their time when it came to efficiency studies.

    1 person found this helpful

  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    A truly charming and heartwarming book about the efficiency expert Frank Gilbreth, his wife, and their dozen children - written by two of the children (Frank Jr. and Ernestine).

    This book was a massive best-seller back in its day. But as time passed, it went out of print and was forgotten and virtually unavailable for many years. I found a copy tucked onto a shelf at a rented vacation cabin on a lake in Maine; the shelves were simply packed with old books, including many issues of Reader's Digest Condensed Classics. Cheaper By The Dozen is not great literature, I suppose. But it's a touching and entertaining window into a time now long gone.

    Please do not mistake it for the current movies of the same title, which have as little to do with the book as Eddie Murphy's Doctor Dolittle movies have to do with Hugh Lofting's beloved classic books for children.

    The movies should be forgotten. The book, on the other hand, is still worth remembering and rereading.

    10/22/2009 - After another re-reading I want to emphasize two things: this is an extremely funny book, and it is also, at the end, a deeply moving one.

    Also, in my initial review I was unintentionally unfair to Lillian Gilbreth, the mother of the family; she was a distinguished scientist in her own right, and has been honored by the Smithsonian Institution and was featured on a U.S. postage stamp.

    The sequel was Belles on their Toes, and I'll be looking for it - as well as other books by Frank and Ernestine.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    A wonderful "slice of life" book, two of the twelve Gilbreath children give us a glimpse into the family that raised twelve children while building careers for both parents that are still admired today. Frank and Lilian Gilbreath are the founding "parents" of the field of Industrial Engineering, and the methods that they used on their children are both fascinating and intriguing. Recommended.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This book has absolutely nothing to do with the recent Steve Martin movies. It’s a nonfiction account, written by two of the children, of their experiences growing up in a family with twelve kids. Their eccentric father was a motion study analyst and taught them the more efficient way to do everything! He even showed them (while he was fully clothed) the fastest way to wash yourself with soap when bathing. One of my favorite anecdotes from the book was when the family was visited by a representative of the national birth control society. They were there to ask the mother if she wanted to get involved with their organization (not knowing how many kids she had). Then the father called all 12 children downstairs and the woman just about had a heart attack. Their father was incredibly focused on teaching them. He quizzed them on multiplication tables, taught them how to type and constantly had recordings going that taught them how to speak French and German. He talked their teachers into frequently letting them skip grades because the kids excelled at such young ages. Unfortunately, as great as that sounds, it’s incredibly hard on the kids to have to make new friends and start all over in a new grade. "In those days women who were scholars were viewed with some suspicion. When mother and dad were married, the Oakland paper said, 'Although a graduate of the University of California, the bride is, none the less, an extremely attractive young woman.'" 
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    True Story of an amazing family at the turn of the century. Wonderful read. Written by two of the children.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    After the last book I read, I needed a book like this. Short, easy to read, cute, and fun. I didn't realize, however, that the stories in the book are true, as remembered by two of the twelve Gilbreth children.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I have read and re-read this story so many times. It was so much fun to get involved in the family dynamics. If you look to deeply, or attempted this type of "managed" family approach, the kids would probably need therapy. Just goes to show you how soft kids are these days :)
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I am probably going to be flayed alive by fans of this classic bit of kiddie lit, but I didn't love it. As a matter of fact, far from wondering what it would have been like to have grown up in their family, I was beyond grateful that I didn't. Usually I am all for daydreaming and inserting myself in the appealing, old-fashioned world but not in this instance. I do understand that writing this book was probably a labor of love on Gilbreth and Carey's parts. And I am quite certain that they would be horrified to know that I found their father, at least as depicted here, to be an unpleasant sort. The idea of running a family as a factory or business might seem quaint and entertaining from a distance but it struck me as distasteful. I was particularly interested in the assertion by the authors that he respected children and that's why so many children liked him. Then, completely without irony, they said that he would cut off their dinner conversation by declaring it "not of general interest" and go on to expound on whatever had fascinated or consumed him that day. Respectful? Wow. That's not my understanding of the word. But the look at the times and the inner workings (even if unusual) of a large family was interesting. Mother Lil was really rather marginalized in this book but I suspect she takes center stage in the next book so perhaps the pair are intended to be seperate portraits of their parents in the milieu that the children knew them best: the family. It is also worth noting that there was only about one year in which all 12 children were at home since the age span between the first and the twelfth is great enough. And since Frank Sr. died when the youngest was merely two, his jovial response to people's wonder at so many children that they come cheaper by the dozen was really only true at the very tail end of his life. The book is almost episodic in nature, with the interesting bits recounted, leaving the narrative flow a bit choppy. And figuring out who all the children were? Don't count on it as they aren't described distinctly enough to differentiate amongst them. But this is a classic and people do love it so perhaps I was just in a terrible mood or completely missed the elusive something that draws readers to a book. The family antics were occasionally entertaining but I had a hard time getting past my dislike of the not quite so genial patriarch. Heresy, but I prefer the movie versions.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Wonder book. I read this one with my wife. Difficult to read aloud in some places as my allergies acted up for some reason. :)
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    A family classic. The antics of the Gilbreth family, with motion-study expert father and psychologist mother never cease to amuse. While this is not a story so much as a series of anecdotes, those anecdotes serve as wonderful exposition to a very amusing family, as well as a look back at times when cars were new, bathing suits had tights, and short hair was a serious hurdle to be overcome with protective parents.To those who have seen the recent movie--The Gilbreth family is run with an efficiency and efficacy that Steve Martin could never dream of. They are not the same at all. Please read the book; it's also funny, but in a much more sophisticated way.To those who have seen the older movies with Myrna Loy, etc: That movie does an excellent job incorporating many of the funniest anecdotes in the book, while creating a story line for them to hang on. The book includes a few more (you might be particularly interested in "Kissing Kin" and "Chinese Cooking," which detail the family's visit to relatives, "Nantucket" and "The Rena" which describe summer escapades, and "Touch" which tells the story of 'Moby Dick,' the white typewriter).
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    1117 Cheaper by the Dozen, by Frank B. Gilbreth, Jr. and Ernestine Gilbreth Casey (read 20 May 1971) I did no post-reading note on this book, but I remember I read it because my wife said it was funny and I should. I found it a light enjoyable reading experience. See:Cheaper by the Dozen - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I first read this book in fifth or sixth grade and found it really entertaining. It's the story of a real family, the Gilbreths, whose parents were industrial engineers and efficiency experts and seemed to have a system for everything. They also had twelve children. It's a cute, funny story that is an easy read.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Wow! I don't even know hot they can call the movie 'based on' this book when the two are NOTHING alike. The ONLY similarity between the book and movie are that there are 12 children. That's IT!

    The book is about the Gilbreths who grew up between 1900-1930 so as you can imagine, their lives were nothing like the kids depicted in the movie version. The father is an engineer who studies motion. His job is to study how people do certain jobs and figure out how they can do them faster.

    In the book, there are 6 girls and 6 boys. In the movie there are 5 girls and 7 boys. In the book the father is tall and plump. In the movie he's tall and thin. Even the order of kid's is wrong. In the book, the oldest three are girls. In the movie It's boy, girl, girl. In the book, they used to have a collie but when he died, they didn't have another dog. In the movie they have a pitbull. In the book there are no multiples. In the movie there is a set of twins. See what I mean?

    Anyways back to the book. It was really interesting to read about life in the 1910's. Although the kids all went to school, the father taught them things at home like languages, astronomy and morse code. The methods are described in the book and I found them interesting and in some cases, worth trying. There are some great ideas for homeschoolers in the book.

    My favourite part is when the Mother is recruiting women to help with church fund-raising. One woman says she would help if she had the time but with three young sons, she is quite busy. She asks the mother if she has any children. The following continues:

    Mother: Oh, yes.
    Woman: Any boys?
    M: Yes, indeed.
    W: May I ask how many?
    M: Certainly. I have six boys.
    W: Six boys! Imagine a family of six!
    M: Oh, there're more in the family than that. I have six girls too.
    W: I surrender. When is the next meeting of the committee? I'll be there, Mrs. Gilbreth, I'll be there

    I highly recommend this book to EVERYONE. Don't be fooled by the movie (which I did enjoy, number #2 as well) this book is quite different. In fact I'd like to see a movie that is REALLY 'based-on' this book. Oh and I guess they wrote more books about their family too. They will be added to my TBR list.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I loved this story. I have read it several time and love how Mr. Gilbreth was into motion study and how to save time in everything. Though I would not have liked to be part of the mass tonsilectomy!
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    A favorite for the large family to read together. Be aware of mild language.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I was not expecting this to be a good book when I picked it up because it was writen so long ago, so I was happily suprised when I started reading. This is a light-hearted and inspiring book. It chronicles the life of a family of twelve living under the roof of a motion study engineer. Everything is done in the most productive way and the strive for efficiency makes for a humorous story. The closeness of this rather large family and their support for one another represented perfectly in this humorous novel.

Book preview

Cheaper by the Dozen - Frank B. Gilbreth

Foreword

MOTHER AND DAD, LILLIAN Moller Gilbreth and Frank Bunker Gilbreth, were industrial engineers. They were among the first in the scientific management field and the very first in motion study. From 1910 to 1924, their firm of Gilbreth, Inc., was employed as efficiency expert by many of the major industrial plants in the United States, Britain, and Germany. Dad died in 1924. After that, Mother carried the load by herself and became perhaps the foremost woman industrial engineer. But that’s another story. This book is about the Gilbreth family before Dad died.

Preface

AS A WRITER STILL in the midst of a life story of my parents, Frank and Lillian Gilbreth, I am always intrigued by the contrasts in their personalities, professional speeches, and writings. In spite of these differences, they both liked to include anecdotes about their dozen children. This was their means of clarifying, dramatizing, and humanizing their courageous mutual fields of work, namely motion-time methodology based on creating unfailing betterment and added happiness-moments for the worker.

My mother, academically a respected psychologist as well as my father’s full engineering partner, often began one of her platform appearances with a dictionary definition of whatever she planned to stress in her remarks.

I, too, follow this practice now and again. For example, let’s decide to explore together my chosen word, curiosity. (As in the old primer maxim: Curiosity killed the cat.) What is its definition? Webster’s answer includes the following: 1. Careful attention. 2. Disposition to inquire into anything. 3. That which is curious or fitted to excite attention.

Very good, so far. Now let’s return to you as a reader, please, and to whatever you believe makes you tick. By chance, were you taught as a child, just as I was, this BASIC: Well-directed curiosity is a blessing beyond price, to be encouraged always in oneself and in others now and forever?

As you probably know already, this conviction was adhered to within our dear old Gilbreth home and in our daily family practices. It was strengthened by our dad’s obvious joy in giving unexpected rewards to whichever child or group of children had pleased him most: expensive watches, glittering imported tools, razor-sharp pocket knives, Hershey chocolate bars, and ice cream sodas—treats beyond measure.

Our boundless curiosity was also encouraged by Tom, our beloved but inefficient and incompetent jack-of-all-trades hired-man. For example, one morning he escorted us kids to the Gilbreth cellar, and to the box where his forbidden brick-red-colored cat had almost finished giving birth to her latest litter. This, he hoped, I’m sure, would answer one of our questions, namely, Where do babies come from, Tom?

But our majestic grandma Martha Bunker Gilbreth, with her Maine-bred, old-time roots, remained a strong-voiced and stubborn dissenter. To see and hear her upbraid her beloved son was entertainment not to be missed by any of us, from Anne down to the newest baby. Land sakes, Frank Gilbreth, are you mad with your crazy ideas here? Do you want to bring tarnation down on us all and have us burned alive? Just a block away from Lillie’s Brown University classes? For shame.

Dad, always fearful of fire, tried to pacify her by designing quick fire escape routes from the house and with sternly supervised, daily fire drills. Also he ordered Tom to buy bigger fire-pails filled with sand and install them on every floor. The biggest pail of all was in the hallway opening onto our single second-floor, traffic-ridden bathroom. It was here that Tom began, on Dad’s orders, his sequence of daily pail inspections. Dreading this chore, he’d scowl, tap his chest, and moan, Lincoln freed the slaves. All but one. All but one.

Meanwhile, Grandma had sound reasons for her continued protests and warnings. For young Billy, our family mischief (young limb of Satan, she’d call him), by now had graduated from his past scientific experiments to new ones, such as placing one of Grandma’s celluloid back-combs dead-center on top of her bedroom kerosene heater. We older children and Grandma now had to become ever watchful in order to prevent potential fiery explosions in the nick of time.

Beyond Grandma’s trials with Billy, her next worry usually was me. She frowned sternly at Dad as she patted my head. This one’s making over-use of her ears and eyes already, she warned after catching me on my knees outside her bedroom-door keyhole listening to her gossip with Dad’s sister. Stop encouraging her with rewards, Frank.

Not surprisingly, such dialogue helped deeply to influence our dozen’s growing-up years, choices of profession, marriage partners, and size of resultant families. Yes, today we’re still stuck with it.

An extra dividend for me has been the continuing capacity to try to cope with the worldwide curiosity roused by my brother Frank Jr.’s and my coauthored books, Cheaper by the Dozen and Belles on Their Toes. And thanks to translations published in fifty-three foreign languages to date (the newest, Korean), why wouldn’t this curiosity be worldwide?

But, oh! Oh! Oh! Between incoming daily mail and the ever-popular Gilbreth Web site, what a range of queries, personal and professional, now confront me! Here are examples of a few:

What happened to your sister Mary? After a while, you and your brother forgot to mention her. Why? Did she die, maybe? If she did die, then I want to hear how, please.

Dear Ernestine, how tall are you? How old are you? How many children do you have?

My little sister is a miserable little pest. How did you ever manage to stand it?

I hear some of your brothers are engineers. Then why didn’t they join your mother’s business? Am I missing something?

Wasn’t it terrible to have your tonsils taken out by mistake? I’d hate it.

Are you and Frank still writing books today? Please send me the names of all of them. I’m late with my school report, so please hurry.

I figure that only half a dozen of the Gilbreth original are alive today, with you the survivor of the top seven. Doesn’t this bother you? Please don’t mind if I’m curious.

Mind? No, I don’t mind. No way!

—Ernestine Gilbreth Carey

1

Whistles and Shaving Bristles

DAD WAS A TALL man, with a large head, jowls, and a Herbert Hoover collar. He was no longer slim; he had passed the two-hundred-pound mark during his early thirties, and left it so far behind that there were times when he had to resort to railway baggage scales to ascertain his displacement. But he carried himself with the self-assurance of a successful gentleman who was proud of his wife, proud of his family, and proud of his business accomplishments.

Dad had enough gall to be divided into three parts, and the ability and poise to backstop the front he placed before the world. He’d walk into a factory like the Zeiss works in Germany or the Pierce Arrow plant in this country and announce that he could speed up production by one-fourth. He’d do it, too.

One reason he had so many children—there were twelve of us—was that he was convinced anything he and Mother teamed up on was sure to be a success.

Dad always practiced what he preached, and it was just about impossible to tell where his scientific management company ended and his family life began. His office was always full of children, and he often took two or three of us, and sometimes all twelve, on business trips. Frequently, we’d tag along at his side, pencils and notebooks in our hands, when Dad toured a factory which had hired him as an efficiency expert.

On the other hand, our house at Montclair, New Jersey, was a sort of school for scientific management and the elimination of wasted motions—or motion study, as Dad and Mother named it.

Dad took moving pictures of us children washing dishes, so that he could figure out how we could reduce our motions and thus hurry through the task. Irregular jobs, such as painting the back porch or removing a stump from the front lawn, were awarded on a low-bid basis. Each child who wanted extra pocket money submitted a sealed bid saying what he would do the job for. The lowest bidder got the contract.

Dad installed process and work charts in the bathrooms. Every child old enough to write—and Dad expected his offspring to start writing at a tender age—was required to initial the charts in the morning after he had brushed his teeth, taken a bath, combed his hair, and made his bed. At night, each child had to weigh himself, plot the figure on a graph, and initial the process charts again after he had done his homework, washed his hands and face, and brushed his teeth. Mother wanted to have a place on the charts for saying prayers, but Dad said as far as he was concerned prayers were voluntary.

It was regimentation, all right. But bear in mind the trouble most parents have in getting just one child off to school, and multiply it by twelve. Some regimentation was necessary to prevent bedlam. Of course there were times when a child would initial the charts without actually having fulfilled the requirements. However, Dad had a gimlet eye and a terrible swift sword. The combined effect was that truth usually went marching on.

Yes, at home or on the job, Dad was always the efficiency expert. He buttoned his vest from the bottom up, instead of from the top down, because the bottom-to-top process took him only three seconds, while the top-to-bottom took seven. He even used two shaving brushes to lather his face, because he found that by so doing he could cut seventeen seconds off his shaving time. For a while he tried shaving with two razors, but he finally gave that up.

I can save forty-four seconds, he grumbled, but I wasted two minutes this morning putting this bandage on my throat.

It wasn’t the slashed throat that really bothered him. It was the two minutes.

Some people used to say that Dad had so many children he couldn’t keep track of them. Dad himself used to tell a story about one time when Mother went off to fill a lecture engagement and left him in charge at home. When Mother returned, she asked him if everything had run smoothly.

Didn’t have any trouble except with that one over there, he replied. But a spanking brought him into line.

Mother could handle any crisis without losing her composure.

That’s not one of ours, dear, she said. He belongs next door.

None of us remembers it, and maybe it never happened. Dad wasn’t above stretching the truth, because there was nothing he liked better than a joke, particularly if it were on him and even more particularly if it were on Mother. This much is certain, though. There were two red-haired children who lived next door, and the Gilbreths all are blondes or redheads.

Although he was a strict taskmaster within his home, Dad tolerated no criticism of the family from outsiders. Once a neighbor complained that a Gilbreth had called the neighbor’s boy a son of an unprintable word.

What are the facts of the matter? Dad asked blandly. And then walked away while the neighbor registered a double take.

But Dad hated unprintable words, and the fact that he had stood up for his son didn’t prevent him from holding a full-dress court of inquiry once he got home, and administering the called-for punishment.

Dad was happiest in a crowd, especially a crowd of kids. Wherever he was, you’d see a string of them trailing him—and the ones with plenty of freckles were pretty sure to be Gilbreths.

He had a way with children and knew how to keep them on their toes. He had a respect for them, too, and didn’t mind showing it.

He believed that most adults stopped thinking the day they left school—and some even before that. A child, on the other hand, stays impressionable and eager to learn. Catch one young enough, Dad insisted, and there’s no limit to what you can teach.

Really, it was love of children more than anything else that made him want a pack of his own. Even with a dozen, he wasn’t fully satisfied. Sometimes he’d look us over and say to Mother:

Never you mind, Lillie. You did the best you could.

We children used to suspect, though, that one reason he had wanted a large family was to assure himself of an appreciative audience, even within the confines of the home. With us around, he could always be sure of a full house, packed to the galleries.

Whenever Dad returned from a trip—even if he had been gone only a day—he whistled the family assembly call as he turned in at the sidewalk of our large, brown home in Montclair. The call was a tune he had composed. He whistled it, loud and shrill, by doubling his tongue behind his front teeth. It took considerable effort and Dad, who never exercised if he could help it, usually ended up puffing with exhaustion.

The call was important. It meant drop everything and come running—or risk dire consequences. At the first note, Gilbreth children came dashing from all corners of the house and yard. Neighborhood dogs, barking hellishly, converged for blocks around. Heads popped out of the windows of nearby houses.

Dad gave the whistle often. He gave it when he had an important family announcement that he wanted to be sure everyone would hear. He gave it when he was bored and wanted some excitement with his children. He gave it when he had invited a friend home and wanted both to introduce the friend to the whole family and to show the friend how quickly the family could assemble. On such occasions, Dad would click a stopwatch, which he always carried in his vest pocket.

Like most of Dad’s ideas, the assembly call, while something more than a nuisance, made sense. This was demonstrated in particular one day when a bonfire of leaves in the driveway got out of control and spread to the side of the house. Dad whistled, and the house was evacuated in fourteen seconds—eight seconds off the all-time record. That occasion also was memorable because of the remarks of a frank neighbor, who watched the blaze from his yard. During the height of the excitement, the neighbor’s wife came to the front door and called to her husband:

What’s going on?

The Gilbreths’ house is on fire, he replied, thank God!

Shall I call the fire department? she shouted.

What’s the matter, are you crazy? the husband answered incredulously.

Anyway, the fire was put out quickly and there was no need to ask the fire department for help.

Dad whistled assembly when he wanted to find out who had been using his razors or who had spilled ink on his desk. He whistled it when he had special jobs to assign or errands to be run. Mostly, though, he sounded the assembly call when he was about to distribute some wonderful surprises, with the biggest and best going to the one who reached him first.

So when we heard him whistle, we never knew whether to expect good news or bad, rags or riches. But we did know for sure we’d better get there in a hurry.

Sometimes, as we all came running to the front door, he’d start by being stern.

Let me see your nails, all of you, he’d grunt, with his face screwed up in a terrible frown. Are they clean? Have you been biting them? Do they need trimming?

Then out would come leather manicure sets for the girls and pocket knives for the boys. How we loved him then, when his frown wrinkles reversed their field and became a wide grin.

Or he’d shake hands solemnly all around, and when you took your hand away there’d be a nut chocolate bar in it. Or he’d ask who had a pencil, and then hand out a dozen automatic ones.

Let’s see, what time is it? he asked once. Out came wrist watches for all—even the six-week-old baby.

Oh, Daddy, they’re just right, we’d say.

And when we’d throw our arms around him and tell him how we’d missed him, he would choke up and wouldn’t be able to answer. So he’d rumple our hair and slap our bottoms instead.

2

Pierce Arrow

THERE WERE OTHER SURPRISES, too. Boxes of Page and Shaw candy, dolls and toys, cameras from Germany, wool socks from Scotland, a dozen Plymouth Rock hens, and two sheep that were supposed to keep the lawn trimmed but died, poor creatures, from the combined effects of saddle sores, too much petting, and tail pulling. The sheep were fun while they lasted, and it is doubtful if any pair of quadrupeds ever had been sheared so often by so many.

If I ever bring anything else alive into this household, Dad said, I hope the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals hauls me into court and makes me pay my debt to society. I never felt so ashamed about anything in my life as I do about those sheep. So help me.

When Dad bought the house in Montclair, he described it to us as a tumbled-down shanty in a rundown neighborhood. We thought this was another one of his surprises, but he finally convinced us that the house was a hovel.

It takes a lot of money to keep this family going, he said. Food, clothes, allowances, doctors’ bills, getting teeth straightened, and buying ice cream sodas. I’m sorry, but I just couldn’t afford anything better. We’ll have to fix it up the best we can, and make it do.

We were living at Providence, Rhode Island, at the time. As we drove from Providence to Montclair, Dad would point to every termite-trap we passed.

It looks something like that one, he would say, only it has a few more broken windows, and the yard is maybe a little smaller.

As we entered Montclair, he drove through the worst section of town, and finally pulled up at an abandoned structure that even Dracula wouldn’t have felt at home in.

Well, here it is, he said. Home. All out.

You’re joking, aren’t you, dear? Mother said hopefully.

What’s the matter with it? Don’t you like it?

If it’s what you want, dear, said Mother, I’m satisfied. I guess.

It’s a slum, that’s what’s the matter with it, said Ernestine.

No one asked your opinion, young lady, replied Dad. I was talking to your Mother, and I will thank you to keep out of the conversation.

You’re welcome, said Ernestine, who knew she was treading on thin ice but was too upset to

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