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The best LGBTQ+ memoirs for Pride
Notable memoirs and biographies exploring what it means to be queer.
Published on July 5, 2023
Pageboy: A Memoir
Elliot PageIn one of the most anticipated celebrity memoirs of the summer — and perhaps the year — Page reveals the complex process of shaking off outside expectations and embracing one’s true self. The Oscar-nominated actor (“Juno,” “The Umbrella Academy”) came out as transgender in 2020, but his memoir begins much earlier, allowing readers to follow along with Page’s vulnerable and powerful journey.
Hola Papi: How to Come Out in a Walmart Parking Lot and Other Life Lessons
John Paul BrammerDubbed the “Cheryl Strayed for young queer people” and the “Picante Carrie Bradshaw,” Brammer steals hearts and soothes minds with his frank and hilarious advice column for the LGBTQ+ community. Part extension of his “¡Hola Papi!” column and part memoir of growing up gay and biracial in rural Oklahoma, Brammer’s book is all love. A glowing reminder to pick ourselves up from past pitfalls and love the person we’ve become.
High-Risk Homosexual: A Memoir
Edgar GomezGomez, a Nicaraguan American and Floridian, retraces his coming-of-age in an environment where heteronormativity and machismo prevailed. His awakening began in queer-friendly spaces, including the Pulse Nightclub pre-2016, where the author slowly learned to live joyfully as his true self. Gomez's Lambda Literary Award-winning memoir is intersectional, sharp, and compassionate.
Girls Can Kiss Now: Essays
Jill GutowitzAs a journalist with witty flair, Gutowitz covered entertainment for outlets like The New Yorker, Vanity Fair, and Vulture. In her debut collection of essays, she couples her expert knowledge of pop culture with her own coming-of-age tale, and what results is a laugh-out-loud collection of comedic essays about growing up as a queer person in the early 2000s.
Punch Me Up To The Gods: A Memoir
Brian BroomeA moving memoir about growing up Black and gay in rural Ohio. Framing his life story around the Gwendolyn Brooks poem “We Real Cool,” Broome brilliantly calls out destructive stereotypes about masculinity. A heart wrenching, intimate look at an outsider's search for a space to be his authentic self.
How We Fight for Our Lives: A Memoir
Saeed JonesPoet Jones lays bare the struggle of growing up both gay and black in Texas. His prose evokes these painful memories with just the right amount of distance to show the hope beyond the otherwise bleak circumstances.
In the Dream House: A Memoir
Carmen Maria MachadoMachado (“Her Body and Other Parties”) doesn’t just break all the rules with her marvelous memoir — she transcends them. Masterfully weaving together dozens of genres, from gothic and folktales, to lesbian pulp and road trips, Machado tells the frightening story of a past relationship with an abusive girlfriend. “In the Dream House” breaks the destructive silence surrounding abusive queer relationships — and ushers in a new way of nonfiction storytelling.
Is It Hot in Here (Or Am I Suffering for All Eternity for the Sins I Committed on Earth)?
Is It Hot in Here (Or Am I Suffering for All Eternity for the Sins I Committed on Earth)?
Zach ZimmermanLike many others, Zimmerman’s journey of coming out and coming into his own was full of family turmoil and internal conflict. But the comedian — a former conservative and Southern Baptist — infuses hilarity into (nearly) every moment. Whether or not you share a similar background with Zimmerman, the antics and perspectives in this essay collection will leave you laughing.
Spoiler Alert: The Hero Dies: A Memoir of Love, Loss, and Other Four-Letter Words
Michael Ausiello“Spoiler Alert” is a testament to the enduring effects of true love and loss. Auseillo, a TV journalist best known for his work at Entertainment Weekly, TV Guide, and TVLine, remembers the 14 years spent with his late husband Kit, particularly their final year together before Kit passed away from aggressive cancer. This memoir offers moments of humor, reflection, heartbreak, and healing.
The Daddy Diaries: The Year I Grew Up
Andy CohenFrom reality TV to the realities of parenthood, Cohen opens up about the joys and challenges (but mostly joys) of being a single dad to two kids. Best known for hosting “Watch What Happens Live” on Bravo TV (and being the first openly gay host of a late-night talk show) the author explores how his priorities drastically shifted after the birth of his daughter in April 2022. His musings are positive and heartwarming, and while he does plenty of celebrity name-dropping, none of it is salacious.
A Burst of Light: and Other Essays
Audre LordeThis 1988 essay collection by Lorde remains as relevant today as it was 35 years ago. The late activist delivers intersectional analyses on race, sexuality, feminism, and health, inspired by her experiences as a Black lesbian who battled cancer multiple times during her lifetime. (She ultimately passed away from the disease in 1992.)
Sorted: Growing Up, Coming Out, and Finding My Place (A Transgender Memoir)
Jackson Bird“Sorted” is both a memoir and an education on the trans experience. While coming-of-age in Texas, Bird, who was assigned female at birth, had little understanding of his own identity and sexuality, but he knew he felt out of sorts in his body. The LGBTQ+ advocate explores how he eventually came to understand himself and the fresh challenges faced once he came out. No matter your identity, this book will make you feel seen and understood.
Life as a Unicorn: A Journey from Shame to Pride and Everything in Between
Amrou Al-KadhiGrowing up gay in a strict Muslim household is hard enough — realizing you’re non binary makes acceptance feel that much more out of reach. Al-Kadhi, now a successful writer and drag performer, emerged on the other side of these experiences stronger and more self-assured, but the journey was often isolating and heartbreaking. Despite the painful memories shared, “Life as a Unicorn” is a hopeful, funny, and inspiring coming-of-age memoir.
Harvey Milk: His Lives and Death
Lillian FadermanHarvey Milk is best known for being one of the first openly gay politicians in the U.S. after he was elected as a city supervisor in 1977 San Francisco. Heartbreakingly, he’s also widely known for his assassination after less than a year in office. Faderman, an acclaimed LGBTQ+ historian, goes beyond the well-known facts in this biography, exploring Milk’s early life and career and the experiences that fueled his later ambitions.
Logical Family: A Memoir
Armistead MaupinTake a trip to 1970s San Francisco with the “Tales of the City” author to learn why the concept of found families has resonated so deeply with the LGBTQ+ community. Maupin delves into his own background in the American South, illustrating why finding a strong, supportive community changed his life and bolstered his identity.
Over the Top: A Raw Journey to Self-Love
Jonathan Van NessGet a behind-the-scenes tour of Van Ness’s life before he stole the show on “Queer Eye.” He’s always been so “over the top,” but his life hasn’t always been so gorgeous because of it. While growing up gay in the Midwest, he endured ridicule and abuse. Now, of course, he’s an icon for fashion and compassion, especially toward yourself. JVN’s story and advice are worth reveling in.
Me: Elton John Official Autobiography
Elton JohnJohn’s “Me” takes you through the extreme highs and deep lows of his upbringing and career. How can you not be entertained by the firsthand retelling of the life of one of music’s biggest divas? Yes, he really did call his office once to ask if they could do something about the wind. But that’s just the tip of the anecdotal iceberg. This audiobook is narrated by the Rocket Man himself and Taron Egerton, who portrayed John in the 2019 biopic.
Redefining Realness: My Path to Womanhood, Identity, Love & So Much More
Janet Mock“Redefining Realness” is a woman of color’s powerful story of coming into her own. Writer and producer Mock’s memoir of coming out as transgender is an urgent read right now, as the higher levels of discrimination and violence committed against trans women of color continues to make national headlines. Mock provides a path to a better tomorrow.
Fun Home: A Family Tragicomic
Alison BechdelBechdel’s comic memoir has been widely lauded for pushing the boundaries of both the medium and the genre. This is by no means a light story of fun family dysfunction: It deals with closeted homosexuality, abuse, and suicide. The “fun home” of the title refers to the funeral home run by Bechdel’s father’s family.
High School
Sara QuinIndie pop favorites Tegan and Sara open up in this revealing autobiography, chronicling their lives from humble beginnings in Calgary, Alberta to worldwide acclaim as musicians and LGBTQ+ icons. In alternating chapters, each of these twin sisters tells their story of growing up gay in a tumultuous household, school struggles, first loves, and, of course, sex, drugs, and rock ’n’ roll.
Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal?
Jeanette WintersonAcclaimed novelist Winterson grew up rejected by her abusive adoptive mother. Just as Winterson came to find comfort — and bits of herself — in books, perhaps you, too, will find comfort in her words and reassurance that resilience pays off.
Fire Shut Up In My Bones: A Memoir
Charles M. BlowA New York Times journalist, Blow tackles the tough task of connecting and disentangling his race, class, sexual, gender, and geographic identity in this poetic memoir. An important coming out story from a bisexual, black, Southern man.
Karamo: My Story of Embracing Purpose, Healing, and Hope
Karamo BrownBrown tells the uplifting story of how he overcame struggles with drugs and alcohol, abuse, racism, homophobia, and more to become the inspirational “Culture Expert” on Netflix’s beloved “Queer Eye.” Karamo’s commitment to strength through lifelong learning and self-reflection radiates throughout his inspiring memoir.
I Can't Date Jesus: Love, Sex, Family, Race, and Other Reasons I've Put My Faith in Beyoncé
I Can't Date Jesus: Love, Sex, Family, Race, and Other Reasons I've Put My Faith in Beyoncé
Michael ArceneauxArceneaux’s essays explore his experiences as a gay, Black, Catholic Southerner, including how he set about, in his words, “unlearning every damaging thing I’ve seen and heard about my identity.” From praying to Jesus to “cure” him of homosexuality and being recruited for the priesthood, to his love of Beyoncé and coming out to his mom, this is a bold collection on the power of self-acceptance.
Unbecoming: A Memoir of Disobedience
Anuradha BhagwatiBhagwati’s life is full of twists and turns, some purposeful and others punishing: After graduating from Yale, she decided to join the Marines, defying the expectations and wishes of her Indian parents. From there, she found a strength previously unknown to her, while also enduring flagrant prejudice as a bisexual woman of color in the Marines. Bhagwati’s life is fascinating, and her work as an activist after leaving the service has led to historic changes for women serving in the military.
Long Live the Tribe of Fatherless Girls: A Memoir
T Kira MaddenMadden was raised by a Chinese Hawaiian mother and a Jewish father in Boca Raton, Florida, and she quickly figured out that she was queer to boot. In her memoir, she reveals just how confining and heavy the boxes we try to shove ourselves (and each other) in are, despite the vast diversity of experiences.
How To Write An Autobiographical Novel: Essays
Alexander CheeChee’s book is mostly memoir mixed with morsels of writing tutorial as he attempts to both unravel and connect all the disparate parts that shape us. Chee’s observations as a mixed-race gay man who grew up with sexual abuse provide a powerful and clear perspective on identity and creativity.