Crazy Rich Asians is an unputdownably funny, original, modern novel.

An outrageous satire of the Asian squillionaire set, this book is like a Chinese Dallas meets Pride and Prejudice. The combination of gold homewares, couture, private jets, absurd social rules and snobbery is utterly hilarious. I actually couldnt put this book down to eat or to watch Downton Abbey. P L U M S Y K E S , bestselling author of Bergdorf Blondes

KEVIN K WA N

CRAZY RICH ASIANS

mordantly funny A N N A W I N T O U R , Vogue

like Dynasty on steroids with more private jets, bigger houses and a lot more money. It is the very definition of a beach read. I finished it over a weekend and by the end was longing to see the ridiculously extravagant and over-the-top world that Mr Kwan had created. I predict this will be the Fifty Shades of Grey of this summer. Vanity Fair Kwans satirical portrayal rings so true, I fear hell need to bring a bodyguard next time he lands at Changi Airport. Elle Crazy Rich Asians is a shrewd, funny, sexy look at the spoiled jetsetter children of the Asian super-rich. It is at once a love story and a potent combination of vintage Jackie Collins and early Evelyn Waugh, everything you wanted to know about young people who have more fun, style, and money than is good for them, and dont care a bit. A stunning debut. M I C H A E L KO R D A , bestselling author of Charmed Lives and Queenie Original and fun, Crazy Rich Asians is quite a roller-coaster trip. I loved it! J AC K I E C O L L I N S , bestselling author of Hollywood Wives As spicily adventurous and lusciously satisfying as the renowned Singaporean street food Kevin Kwans characters argue over; hot and sizzling, like the best satay; and dreamily transporting, like everyones favorite dessert goreng pisang. Feast on this outrageously funny and insightful novel of modern manners, and enjoy! L I S A S E E , bestselling author of Dreams of Joy and Shanghai Girls

a novel

Cover design: Ben Wiseman Cover photograph: adrisbow/Flickr/Getty Images

FICTION

Jane Austen, or maybe Edith Wharton, goes to Singapore, turning in this lively, entertaining novel of manners. Youve got to like any novel set in Asia that includes, among many splendid one-liners, this amahs admonition: Dont you know there are children starving in America? . . . Kwans characters are urban sophisticates par excellence, many of them familiar with the poshest districts of London, Paris, New York and Hong Kong . . . An elegant comedy and an auspicious debut. Kirkus (starred review) Welcome to the outrageously funny debut novel about three super-rich, pedigreed Chinese families and the gossip, backbiting, and scheming that occurs when the heir to one of the most massive fortunes in Asia brings home his ABC (American-born Chinese) girlfriend to the wedding of the season. When Rachel Chu agrees to spend the summer in Singapore with her boyfriend, Nicholas Young, she envisions a humble family home, long drives to explore the island, and quality time with the man she might one day marry. What she doesnt know is that Nicks family home happens to look like a palace, that shell ride in more private planes than cars, and that with one of Asias most eligible bachelors on her arm, Rachel might as well have a target on her back. Initiated into a world of dynastic splendor beyond imagination, Rachel meets Astrid, the It Girl of Singapore society; Eddie, whose family practically lives in the pages of the Hong Kong socialite magazines; and Eleanor, Nicks formidable mother, a woman who has very strong feelings about who her son shouldand should notmarry. Uproarious, addictive, and lled with jaw-dropping opulence, Crazy Rich Asians is an insiders look at the Asian jet set; a perfect depiction of the clash between old money and new money and between Overseas Chinese and Mainland Chinese; and a fabulous novel about what it means to be young, in love, and gloriously, crazily rich. Kwans debut is a scintillating ctional look into the opulent lives of fabulously wealthy Chinese expats . . . From its delightful opening scene onward, this sleek social satire offers up more than a few hilarious moments as it skewers the crafty, rich schemers who populate its pages. Kristine Huntley, Booklist

Crazy Rich Asians

Kevin Kwa n

First published in Australia and New Zealand by Allen & Unwin in 2013 First published in the United States in 2013 by Doubleday, a division of Random House, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval system, without prior permission in writing from the publisher.The Australian Copyright Act 1968 (the Act) allows a maximum of one chapter or 10 per cent of this book, whichever is the greater, to be photocopied by any educational institution for its educational purposes provided that the educational institution (or body that administers it) has given a remuneration notice to Copyright Agency Limited (CAL) under the Act. Allen & Unwin 83 Alexander Street Crows Nest NSW 2065 Australia Phone: (61 2) 8425 0100 Email: info@allenandunwin.com Web: www.allenandunwin.com Cataloguing-in-Publication details are available from the National Library of Australia www.trove.nla.gov.au Grateful permission is made to Kurt Kaiser for permission to reprint an excerpt from the song Pass It On from Tell It Like It Is. Reprinted by permission of the artist. ISBN 978 1 74331 728 0 Internal design by Maria Carella Part opening illustration by Alice Tait Printed and bound in Australia by Grifn Press 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
The paper in this book is FSC certified. FSC promotes environmentally responsible, socially beneficial and economically viable management of the worlds forests.

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11
Ra c h e l

SA MSA R A ISL A ND

The bachelorettes were enjoying a sunset dinner at a long table set under a pavilion of billowing orange silk on the pristine white sand, surrounded by glowing silver lanterns. With dusk transforming the gentle waves into an emerald froth, it could have been a photo shoot straight out of Cond Nast Traveler, except that the dinner conversation put a damper on that illusion. As the rst course of baby Bibb lettuce with hearts of palm in a coconut-milk dressing was served, the cluster of girls to Rachels left were busy skewering into the heart of another girls boyfriend. So you say he just made senior vice president? But hes on the retail side, not the investment banking side, right? I spoke to my boyfriend Roderick, and he thinks that Simon probably makes between six to eight hundred thou base salary, if hes lucky. And he doesnt get millions in bonuses like the I-bankers, sniffed Lauren Lee. The other problem is his family. Simons not even the eldest brother. Hes the second youngest of ve, Parker Yeo ponticated. My parents know the Tings very well, and let me tell you, as respected as they are, they are not what you or I would consider richmy mum says they have maybe two hundred million, max. You split that ve ways and youll be lucky if Simon gets forty mil at the end of the day. And that wont be for a loooong timehis par-

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ents are still quite young. Isnt his father going to run for parliament again? We just want whats best for you, Isabel, Lauren said, patting her hand sympathetically. But... but I really think I love him Isabel stammered. Francesca Shaw cut in. Isabel, Im going to tell it to you like it is, because everyone here is wasting your time being polite. You cant afford to fall in love with Simon. Let me break it down for you. Lets be generous and assume that Simon is making a measly eight hundred thousand a year. After taxes and CPF,* his take-home is only about half a million. Where are you going to live on that kind of money? Think about ityou have to factor a million dollars per bedroom, and you need at least three bedrooms, so you are talking three mil for an apartment in Bukit Timah. Thats a hundred and fty thousand a year in mortgage and property taxes. Then say you have two kids, and you want to send them to proper schools. At thirty thousand a year each for school fees thats sixty thousand, plus twenty thousand a year each on tutors. Thats one hundred thousand a year on schooling alone. Servants and nanniestwo Indonesian or Sri Lankan maids will cost you another thirty thousand, unless you want one of them to be a Swedish or French au pair, then youre talking eighty thousand a year spent on the help. Now, what are we going to do about your own upkeep? At the very least, youll need ten new outts per season, so you wont be ashamed to be seen in public. Thank God Singapore only has two seasonshot and hotter so lets just say, to be practical, youll only spend four thousand per look. Thats eighty thousand a year for wardrobe. Ill throw in another twenty thousand for one good handbag and a few pairs of new shoes every season. And then there is your basic maintenancehair, facials, mani, pedi, brazilian wax, eyebrow wax, massage, chiro, acupuncture, Pilates,
* Central Provident Fund, a mandatory savings scheme that Singaporeans contribute to each month to fund their retirement, health care, and housing. Its a bit like the U.S. Social Security program, except that the CPF wont be going broke anytime soon. CPF account holders earn an average of ve percent interest per year, and the government also periodically gifts its citizens with bonuses and special shares, making Singapore the only country in the world that gives dividends to all its citizens when the economy does well. (Now you know why that Facebook fellow became a Singaporean.)

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yoga, core fusion, personal trainer. Thats another forty thousand a year. Weve already spent four hundred and seventy thousand of Simons salary, which leaves just thirty thousand for everything else. How are you going to put food on the table and clothe your babies with that? How will you ever get away to an Aman resort twice a year? And we havent even taken into account your membership dues at Churchill Club and Pulau Club! Dont you see? Its impossible for you to marry Simon. We wouldnt worry if you had your own money, but you know your situation. The clock is ticking on your pretty face. Its time to cut your losses and let Lauren introduce you to one of those eligible Beijing billionaires before its too late. Isabel was reduced to a puddle of tears. Rachel couldnt believe what she had just heardthis crowd made Upper East Side girls look like Mennonites. She tried to shift her attention back to the food. The second course had just been served a surprisingly tasty langoustine and calamansi lime gele terrine. Unfortunately, the girls on her right seemed to be loudly xating on some couple named Alistair and Kitty. Aiyah, I dont understand what he sees in her, Chlo Ho lamented. With the fake accent and fake breasts and fake everything. I know exactly what he sees in her. He sees those fake breasts, and thats all he needs to see! Parker cackled. Serena Oh told me that she ran into them at Lung King Heen last week, and Kitty was in Gucci, head to toe. Gucci purse, Gucci halter top, Gucci satin mini-shorts, and Gucci python boots, Chlo said. She kept her Gucci sunglasses on all through dinner, and apparently even made out with him at the table with her sunglasseson. Alamaaaaak, how tacky can you get! Wandi hissed, patting her diamond-and-aquamarine tiara. Parker suddenly addressed Rachel from across the table. Wait a minute, have you met them yet? Who? Rachel asked, since she was trying to tune the girls out rather than listen in on their salacious gossip. Alistair and Kitty! Sorry, I wasnt really following... who are they? Francesca glanced at Rachel and said, Parker, dont waste your timeits obvious Rachel doesnt know anybody.

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Rachel didnt understand why Francesca was being so icy toward her. She decided to ignore the comment and took a sip of her Pinot Gris. So Rachel, tell us how you met Nicholas Young, Lauren asked loudly. Well, its not a very exciting story. We both teach at NYU, and we were set up by a colleague of mine, Rachel answered, noticing that all eyes at the table were xed on her. Oh, who is the colleague? A Singaporean? Lauren asked. No, shes Chinese American, Sylvia Wong-Swartz. How did she know Nicholas? Parker asked. Um, they met on some committee. So she didnt know him very well? Parker continued. No, I dont think so, Rachel replied, wondering what these girls were getting at. Why the interest in Sylvia? Oh, I love setting up my friends too, so I was just curious to know what motivated your friend to set the two of you up, thats all. Parker smiled. Well, Sylvias a good friend, and she was always trying to set me up. She just thought Nick was cute and a total catch... Rachel began, instantly regretting her choice of words. It sure sounds like she did her homework on that, didnt she? Francesca said with a sharp laugh. After dinner, while the girls took off for the disco marquee precariously erected on a jetty, Rachel headed alone to the beach bar, a picturesque gazebo overlooking a secluded cove. It was empty except for the tall, strapping bartender who grinned broadly when she entered. Signorina, can I make you something special? he asked in an almost comically seductive accent. Hell, did Aramintas mother only hire dashing Italians? Ive actually been craving a beer. Do you have any beer? Of course. Lets see, we have Corona, Duvel, Moretti, Red Stripe, and my personal favorite, Lion Stout. Thats one Ive never heard of. Its from Sri Lanka. Its creamy and bittersweet, with a rich tan head. Rachel couldnt help giggling. It sounded like he was describing himself. Well if its your favorite, then I have to try it. As he poured the beer into a tall frosted glass, a girl whom Rachel

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hadnt previously noticed strolled into the bar and slipped onto the stool next to her. Thank God theres someone else here who drinks beer! I am so sick of all those pissy low-cal cocktails, the girl said. She was Chinese, but spoke with an Australian accent. Cheers to that, Rachel replied, tipping her glass at the girl. The girl ordered a Corona, and grabbed the bottle from the bartender before he could pour it into a glass. He looked personally wounded as she tilted her head back and downed her beer in full-bodied gulps. Rachel, isnt it? Thats right. But if youre looking for the Taiwanese Rachel Chu, youve got the wrong girl, Rachel shot back preemptively. The girl smiled quizzically, a little baffled by Rachels response. Im Astrids cousin Sophie. She told me to look out for you. Oh, hi, Rachel said, disarmed by Sophies friendly smile and deep dimples. Unlike the other girls sporting the latest resort fashions, she was dressed plainly in a sleeveless cotton shirt and a pair of khaki shorts. She had a no-nonsense pageboy haircut, and wore no makeup or jewelry except for a plastic Swatch on her wrist. Were you on the plane with us? Rachel asked, trying to remember her. No, no, I ew in on my own and just arrived a little while ago, You have your own plane too? No, Im afraid not. Sophie laughed. Im the lucky one who ew Garuda Airlines, economy class. I had some hospital rounds to do, so I couldnt get away until later this afternoon. Youre a nurse? Pediatric surgeon. Once again, Rachel was reminded that one could never judge a book by its cover, especially in Asia. So youre Astrid and Nicks cousin? No, just Astrids, on the Leong side. Her father is my mums brother. But of course I know Nickwe all grew up together. And you grew up in the States, right? Where did you live? I spent my teenage years in California, but Ive lived in twelve different states. We moved around quite a bit when I was younger. Why did you move around so much? My mom worked in Chinese restaurants. What did she do?

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She usually started out as a hostess or a waitress, but she always managed to get promoted quickly. So she took you everywhere with her? Sophie asked, genuinely fascinated. Yeswe lived the Gypsy life until my teenage years, when we settled down in California. Was it lonely for you? Well, it was all I knew, so it seemed normal to me. I got to know the back rooms of suburban strip-mall restaurants very well, and I was pretty much a bookworm. And what about your father? He died soon after I was born. Oh, Im sorry, Sophie said quickly, regretting that she had asked. Thats neI never knew him. Rachel smiled, trying to put her at ease. And anyway, it wasnt all bad. My mom put herself through night school, got a college degree, and has been a successful real estate agent for many years now. Thats amazing, Sophie said. Not really. Were actually one of the many clichd Asian immigrant success stories that politicians love to trot out every four years during their conventions. Sophie chuckled. I can see why Nick likes youyou both have the same dry wit. Rachel smiled, looking away toward the disco marquee on the jetty. Am I keeping you from the dance party? I hear Araminta ew in some famous DJ from Ibiza, Sophie said. Im enjoying this, actually. Its the rst real conversation Ive had all day. Sophie glanced at the girlsmost of whom were now writhing wildly with several of the Italian waiters to the pounding eurotrance-disco music and shrugged. Well, with this crowd, I cant say Im surprised. Arent these your friends? A few, but most of these girls I dont know. I recognize them, of course. Who are they? Are some of them famous? In their own minds, perhaps. These are the more social girls,

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the type that are always appearing in the magazines, attending all the charity galas. Far too glamorous a crowd for me. Im sorry, but I work twelve-hour shifts and dont have the time to go to benet parties in hotels. I have to benet my patients rst. Rachel laughed. Speaking of which, Sophie added, Ive been up since ve, so Im going to turn in now. I think I will too, Rachel said. They walked down the jetty toward their bungalows. Im in the villa at the end of this walkway if you need anything, Sophie said. Good night, Rachel said. Its been lovely talking with you. Likewise, Sophie said, ashing that deep-dimpled smile again. Rachel entered her villa, gladly returning to some peace and quiet after a draining day. None of the lights were on in the suite, but the bright silvery moonlight glimmered through the open screen doors, casting serpentine ripples along the walls. The sea was so still that the sound of the water lapping slowly against the wood stilts had a hypnotic effect. It was the perfect setting for a night swim in the ocean, something shed never done. Rachel padded toward the bedroom for her bikini. As she passed the vanity table, she noticed that the leather satchel shed left hanging on the chair seemed to be leaking some sort of liquid. She walked toward the bag and saw that it was completely drenched, with brownish water dripping out of the corner into a large puddle on the bedroom oor. What the hell happened? She turned on the lamp by the table and opened the front ap of her bag. She screamed, jerking backward in horror and knocking over the table lamp. Her bag was lled with a large sh that had been badly mutilated, blood seeping out from its gills. Violently scrawled on the vanity mirror above the chair in sh blood were the words CATCH THIS, YOU GOLD-DIGGING CUNT!

15
Nick

M AC AU

Nick ran his ngers along the leather-bound spines perfectly arranged on the neoclassical mahogany bookcase. Lieutenant Hornblower. Islands in the Stream. Billy Budd. All nautical-themed titles. He picked out a volume by Knut Hamsun that he had never heard of, August, and settled into one of the overstuffed club chairs, hoping he would be undisturbed for a while. Cracking open the stiff embossed cover, he could tell at once that its pages, like most of the others here, had probably never seen the light of day. Hardly surprising, considering that this sumptuous library was tucked away on the lower deck of a 388-foot yacht that boasted such distractions as a ballroom, a karaoke lounge for Bernards dad, a chapel for his mother, a casino, a sushi bar complete with a full-time sushi chef from Hokkaido, two swimming pools, and an outdoor bowling alley on the uppermost deck that also converted into a runway for fashion shows. Nick glanced at the door in dismay as footsteps could be heard coming down the spiral staircase just outside the library. If hed been smarter, he would have locked the door behind him. Much to Nicks relief, it was Mehmet who peered in. Nicholas Youngwhy am I not surprised to nd you in the only intellectually inclined room on this entire vessel? Mehmet remarked. Mind if I join you? This looks to be the quietest place on the boat, and if I have to hear another Htel

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Costes remix, I think Im going to jump overboard and swim for the nearest buoy. Youre most welcome here. How are the natives doing? Incredibly restless, I would say. I left the pool deck just as the ice-cream-sundae contest began. Theyre making sundaes? Nick cocked an eyebrow. Yes. On a dozen nude Macanese girls. Nick shook his head wearily. I tried to rescue Colin, but he got trapped. Bernard anointed Colin the Whipped Cream King. Mehmet slouched into a club chair and closed his eyes. Colin should have listened to me and come to Istanbul for a relaxing getaway before the wedding. I told him to invite you too. Now that would have been nice. Nick smiled. I would much rather be at your familys summer palace on the banks of the Bosphorus than on this boat. You know, Im surprised Colin had a bachelor party in the rst place. It didnt strike me as his sort of thing. Its not, but I think Colin felt like he couldnt refuse Bernard, what with Bernards father being the largest minority shareholder in the Khoo Organization, Nick explained. Bernards doing a ne job, isnt he? He truly thinks Colin enjoys being part of the biggest drug and drinking binge Ive witnessed since spring break in Cabo, Mehmet murmured. Nick stared at him in surprise, never expecting to hear those words come out of Mehmets mouth. Mehmet opened one eye and grinned. Just kidding. Ive never been to CaboI just always wanted to say that. You scared me for a second! Nick laughed. Just then, Colin stumbled into the library and plopped down on the nearest chair. God help me! I dont think Ill ever be able to eat another maraschino cherry again! He moaned, massaging his temples. Colin, did you actually eat off one of the girls? Mehmet asked incredulously. Nooo! Araminta would kill me if she found out I ate a hot fudge sundae off some girls pu... er, crotch. I only took one cherry, and then I told Bernard I really needed to go to the bathroom.

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Where did all these girls come from in the rst place? Mehmet asked. Bernard hired them from that brothel he forced all of us to go to last night, Colin mumbled through his pounding headache. You know, I think he was genuinely shocked when we turned down the girls he had procured for the night, Mehmet remarked. Poor bastard. Weve completely ruined his bachelor weekend, havent we? We didnt want to go to the dogghts, we didnt want to make sex videos with prostitutes, and we turned up our noses at his fancy Peruvian cocaine. Nick laughed. Screams could be heard from the upper deck, followed by much panicked yelling. I wonder whats happening now, Nick said. But none of them could muster up the effort to get out of the plush club chairs. The yacht began to slow, and several crewmen could be heard running along the lower decks. Alistair strolled into the room, carefully balancing a white cup and saucer with what appeared to be a very frothy cappuccino. Whats all the screaming on the deck? Colin asked with a groan. Alistair simply rolled his eyes and sat down in one of the chairs by the Regency drum table. One of the girls slipped overboard during the oil-wrestling contest. Not to worry, her breasts make an excellent otation device. He began sipping his coffee, but then made a face. The Aussie bartender lied to me. He told me he could make the perfect at white, and this isnt even close. This is just a lousy latte! What is a at white? Mehmet asked. Its a kind of cappuccino that they only do down in Oz. You use the steamed, frothy milk from the bottom of the jug, holding back the foam at the top so that you get this smooth, velvety texture. And thats good? Mehmet continued, a little intrigued. Oh, its the best. I had to have at least two a day back in my uni days in Sydney, Alistair said. God, now Im craving one too! Colin sighed. This is a fucking nightmare. I just wish we could get off this boat and go have a decent cup of coffee somewhere. I know this is supposed to be one of the coolest new yachts in the world and I should be so grateful, but frankly, it feels like a oating prison to me. His face darkened, and Nick looked at him uneasily. Nick could sense that Colin was slipping

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fast into one of his deep funks. An idea began to take shape in his head. He whipped out his cell phone and began scrolling through his contacts, leaning over to Mehmet and whispering in his ear. Mehmet grinned and nodded eagerly. What are the two of you whispering about? Alistair asked, leaning over curiously. I just had an idea. Colin, are you ready to bail out of this pathetically lame bachelor party? Nick asked. I would like nothing more, but I dont think I can risk offending Bernard and, more important, his father. I mean, Bernard pulled out all the stops to entertain us in grand style this weekend. Actually, Bernard pulled out all the stops to entertain himself, Nick retorted. Look how miserable you are. How much more of this do you want to endure, just so the Tais wont be offended? Its your last weekend as a single man, Colin. I think I have an exit strategy that wont offend anyone. If I can make it happen, will you play along? Okay... why not? Colin said a little trepidatiously. Hear, hear! Alistair cheered.

Quick, quick, we have a medical emergency. I need you to stop this boat, and I need our precise coordinates right now, Nick demanded as he rushed into the yachts pilothouse. Whats the matter? the captain asked. My friend is suffering from acute pancreatitis. We have a doctor below, who thinks he might have begun bleeding internally. Im on the line with the life-ight rescue chopper, Nick said, holding up his cell phone anxiously. Wait a minute, just wait a minuteIm the captain of this ship. Im the one who decides whether we call for medical evacuations. Whos the doctor below? Let me go see the patient, the captain gruffly demanded. Captain, with all due respect, we dont have a moment to waste. You can come look at him all you want, but right now, I just need the coordinates from you. But who are you speaking to? Macau Coast Guard? This is highly irregular protocol. Let me talk to them, the captain sputtered in confusion.

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Nick put on his most condescendingly posh accenthoned from all his years at Balliol and glowered at the captain. Do you have any idea who my friend is? Hes Colin Khoo, heir to one of the biggest fortunes on the planet. Dont get snooty with me, young chap! the captain bellowed. I dont care who your friend is, there are maritime emergency protocols I MUST FOLLOW, AND AND RIGHT NOW, my friend is below deck on your ship, quite possibly hemorrhaging to death, because you wont let me call for an emergency evacuation! Nick interrupted, raising his voice to match the captains. Do you want to take the blame for this? Because you will, I can guarantee that. Im Nicholas Young, and my family controls one of the worlds largest shipping conglomerates. Please just give me the fucking coordinates now, or I promise you Ill personally see to it that you wont even be able to captain a piece of Styrofoam after today! Twenty minutes later, as Bernard sat in the diamond-shaped Jacuzzi on the uppermost deck while a half-Portuguese girl tried to swallow both of his testicles under the bubbly water jets, a white Sikorsky helicopter appeared out of the sky and began to descend onto the yachts helipad. At rst he thought he was hallucinating from all the booze. Then he saw Nick, Mehmet, and Alistair emerge onto the helipad, holding a stretcher on which lay Colin, tightly bundled up in one of the yachts silk Etro blankets. What the fuck is happening? he said, getting out of the water, pulling on his Vilebrequin trunks and rushing up the steps toward the helipad. He ran into Lionel in the corridor. I was just coming to tell you Colin is feeling horribly sick. Hes been doubled over in pain for the past hour and throwing up uncontrollably. We think its alcohol poisoning, from all of his boozing over the past two days. Were getting him off the boat and straight to the hospital. They ran to the helicopter, and Bernard looked in at Colin, who was groaning softly, his face locked in a grimace. Alistair sat beside him, mopping his forehead with a damp towel. But, but, why the hell didnt anyone tell me sooner? I had no idea Colin was feeling this sick. Kan ni na! Now your family is going to blame me. And then its going to get into all the gossip columns, all the papers, Bernard complained, suddenly becoming alarmed. Nothings going to leak. No gossip, no newspapers, Lionel

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said solemnly. Colin doesnt want you to get any blame, which is why you have to listen to me nowwere going to take him to the hospital, and we wont tell anyone in the family whats happening. Ive had alcohol poisoning before Colin just needs to get detoxed and rehydrated. Hell be ne in a few days. You and the other guys need to keep pretending that nothings wrong and keep partying, okay? Dont call the family, dont say a word to anyone, and well see you back in Singapore. Okay, okay, Bernard nodded rapidly, feeling relieved. Now he could get back to his blow job without feeling guilty. As the helicopter lifted off from the yacht, Nick and Alistair began laughing uncontrollably at the gure of Bernard, his baggy swimming trunks whipping around his pale damp thighs, staring up at them in bewilderment. I dont think it even occurred to him that this isnt a medical helicopter but a chartered one. Mehmet chuckled. Where are we going? Colin asked excitedly, throwing off the purple-and-gold paisley blanket. Mehmet and I have chartered a Cessna Citation X. Its all fueled up and waiting for us in Hong Kong. From there, its a surprise, Nick said. The Citation X. Isnt that the plane that ies at six hundred miles per hour? Alistair asked. Its even faster when were just ve people with no luggage. Nick grinned.

A mere six hours later, Nick, Colin, Alistair, Mehmet, and Lionel found themselves sitting on canvas chairs in the middle of the Australian desert, taking in the spectacular view of the glowing rock. Ive always wanted to come to Ayers Rock. Or Uluru, or whatever they call it now, Colin said. Its so quiet, Mehmet said softly. This is a very spiritual place, isnt it? I can really feel its energy, even from this distance. Its considered to be the most sacred site for the Aboriginal tribes, Nick answered. My father brought me here years ago. Back in those days, we were still allowed to climb the rock. They stopped letting you do that a few years ago. Guys, I cant thank you enough. This was the perfect escape

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from a very misguided bachelor party. Im sorry I put all of you through Bernards bullshit. This is really all I ever hoped forto be someplace amazing with my best friends. A man in a white polo shirt and khaki shorts approached with a large tray from the luxury eco-resort nearby. Well, Colin, AlistairI thought that the only way to get you coffee snobs to stop bitching and moaning was to get you a decent at white, one hundred percent made in Australia, Nick said, as the waiter put the tray down on the reddish earth. Alistair brought the cup to his nose and inhaled the rich aroma deeply. Nick, if you werent my cousin, Id kiss you right now, he joked. Colin took a long sip of his coffee, its perfect velvety foam leaving a white frothy mustache on his upper lip. This has got to be the best coffee Ive ever tasted. Guys, Ill never forget this. It was just past sunset, and the sky was shifting rapidly from shades of burnt orange into a deep violet blue. The men sat in awed silence, as the worlds largest monolith glowed and shimmered a thousand indescribable shades of crimson.

PRAISE FOR CRAZY RICH ASIANS

Crazy Rich Asians is this summers Bergdorf Blondes, over-the-top funny and a novelty to boot. Mr Kwan delivers nonstop hoots about a whole new breed of rich, vulgar, brand-name-dropping conspicuous consumers, with its own delicacies, curses, vices, stereotypes and acronyms. New York Times High-quality rst-time ction . . . An instant favourite . . . Opulence and zaniness reign when one of Singapores richest bachelors invites his American-born girlfriend to travel from New York to vacation in his native country. O, The Oprah Magazine Deliciously decadent . . . Rachel, an American-born Chinese (ABC), has no idea what to expect when she visits Singapore to meet her boyfriend Nicks multibillionaire family. There, she discovers mind-blowing opulencenext seasons couture, palatial properties, million-dollar shopping spreesand the over-the-top bad behaviour that comes with it . . . This 48 carat beach read is crazy fun. Entertainment Weekly Crazy Rich Asians is both a deliciously satiric read and a Fodors of sorts to the world of Singapores fabulously monied, both new and old. NY Daily News Theres rich, theres lthy rich, and then theres crazy rich . . . A Pride and Prejudice-like send-up about an heir bringing his Chinese-American girlfriend home to meet his ancestor-obsessed family, the book hilariously skewers imperial splendour and the conniving antics of the Asians jet set. People With his debut novel, [Kwan] delivers an uproarious, comical satire about a jet set life that most of us can only imagine. Its a page-turner that will leave you wanting more. Hello! Magazine Singapore native Kevin Kwans debut plays out like an extravagant romcom. Get swept into a culture of Rolls-Royces and ruthless high society in this lively pageturner. Chatelaine Merits a place on the must-read list of every development exec in town . . . Aimed at Bridget Jones lovers and those who got the satire behind Psys Gangnam Style. Andy Lewis, Hollywood Reporter Kwans debut is a fun, over-the-top romp through the unbelievable world of the Asian jet set, where anything from this season is already pass and ones pedigree is everything . . . A witty tongue-in-cheek frolic about what it means to be from really old money and what its like to be crazy rich. Publishers Weekly Pick of the Week One of the 10 beach reads of all time! Glo

Private jets with yoga studios! Wedding receptions featuring Cirque du Soleil! State-of-the-art closets that never let you wear the same outt twice! Ogling the habits of the rich never gets old, and today theres no better place to wealthy watch than in the dazzling cosmopolitan cities of Asia. Born and raised in Singaporewhere 17 percent of people are millionaires!Kevin Kwan satirises the jet-setting, couture-buying, back-stabbing ways of three Chinese families in his debut novel, Crazy Rich Asians. Goodreads Read Kevin Kwans debut, Crazy Rich Asians, on an exotic beach in super-expensive sunglasses . . . [Rachel] encounters outr fashion, private jets, and a set of aristocratic values so antiquated theyd make the Dowager Countess proud. Entertainment Weekly Summer Roundup A juicy, close anthropological read of Singapore high society and its social and mating rituals . . . Kwans satirical portrayal rings so true, I fear hell need to bring a bodyguard next time he lands at Changi Airport. He gets the idiosyncratic details right: the market-savvy wives who day-trade and invest in poverty; the encyclopedic fashion knowledge; the Bible-study get-togethers; the way the whole milieu is interrelated by blood or marriage. And he does a particularly good job of illustrating the divide . . . between mainland wealth and establishment moneyan uneasy tension that is very real. Elle