Yekaterina Murafa Unit 4, Essay 2.

OPTION G: NATIONAL LEGALIZATION OF SAME SEX MARRIAGE.

1088 words

I was having a hard time to pick an option for my second essay. Help came from my twelve
year old daughter, who has experienced first hand all the challenges that come into your life,
when your mother starts dating a woman. She (my daughter) looked at the list, and without a
single moment of hesitation said- Option G mom, duh!. Things between me and lets call her
Mary didnt work out. In spite of that, my daughter is continuing to fight for, and support
rights of LGBT community. I foresee a problem making this into 500 to 700 words essay, as a lot
of thoughts will be coming from personal experience, which still resonates with a lot of painful
memories and hurt. Not the relationship itself, but the crazy outcomes that came with it.
To answer the first question - yes, regardless of all the drama and hurt, I am still being
hopeful that one day each and every state in America will allow same -sex marriage. Why?
I have high hopes for younger generation, and not only young ones like my daughter, but a
new generation of religious communities. Rights are best guarded, when each person and group
guards for others those rights they wish guarded for themselves. (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, Q
Salt Lake magazine, P.12). There you have it- the religious group that for so long was denying
rights to LGBT community, sweeping under the rug scary statistics of suicides of young church
members, that were scared to come out, same group that started Proposition 8, and threw
millions of dollars away, only for that proposition to be overturned years later. A lot of people are
skeptical of those new church movements, and I dont blame them. We are in the mess we in
because of the religion, and I am not just talking about LGBT rights. However, I will stay on the
subject.

When one of my good friends, who is also from Russia, found out I was dating a woman, you
would not believe how fast the dynamics of our friendship changed. The reason- I was
somehow threatening her marriage. My friend married an LDS missionary, whom she met in the
night club in Moscow. Yes, you read it right- they met in the night club, where she used to work,
party, drink Russian juice called vodka, and he did lots of drugs. Of course, after settling in
Salt Lake City, they had to comply with all of the rules of the organized religion they belonged
to. After Prop.8, my ex friend and I used to have many heated discussions on the topic of
same-sex marriage. One day she put up on FB a post and a picture about her devoted support
to protect the sanctity of marriage, by supporting prop.8. Our friendship, on and off FB ended
the same moment I saw that post. I guess somehow gay people, and their wish to get married,
and have same rights as everyone else, is extremely threatening to a lot of religious folks. Never
mind the fact that straight people have managed to ruin their own marriage for years, without any
help from LGBT community. Research confirms that the proportions of all marriages- first,
second, or more- ending in divorce increased dramatically since the 1950s, when one in four
marriages ended in divorce. By 1977 the ratio was one divorce to every two marriages.
(Crooks & Baur, 2014, p.388). Same-sex marriage was nowhere near to be legalized back then,
so who could we blame for such high rate of divorces?
I think there definitely would be more advantages to national legalization of same-sex
marriage. First and foremost - many happy couples partaking in the rights they are absolutely
entitled to! Why shouldnt gay people not have those rights? They pay taxes as everyone else,
follow same laws as everyone else does, contribute to society as most of us try to do on a daily
basis. Second advantage would be very important as well- putting a bigger distance between

church and state. We all know why we havent succeeded to legalize same -sex marriage in all of
the states- religious believes. Why is religion still dictating the simple rules for humanity? Who
gave the right to religious organizations to decide for all of the groups in out society? Yes,
America is build on a religious freedom, but not on religious freedom to install dictatorship
towards something or someone their magic book does not agree with. Another great advantage
would be for many children that are in need of families. With legalization of same-sex marriage,
I think adoption laws for gay people should change as well. I strongly believe that having a
loving family that consists of two dads, or two moms is so much better than having no family at
all. The whole argument about children needing both - mom and dad- needs to be thrown out of
the window. Children need love and care, and so many gay couples are ready and willing to
provide that. With that said, children that are already growing up with two dads, or two moms,
would probably feel better seeing that their parents have same rights as straight parents. Lets not
forget about blooming economics in wedding industry! I myself would have so much more work
playing violin at so many more weddings! To be quiet honest - I do not really see any
disadvantages with national same-sex legalization.
The biggest obstacle LGBT community is facing at the moment, is religion, and inability in
this country to separate it from our laws. Religion goes hand in hand with peoples dark ages
believes still being predominant in every day life. When people realize we are all the same, want
the same things in life, things might start turning around. I am not saying that every religion is
the same, a lot of different religious groups have opened their doors to LGBT members and even
perform marriages for them. However, we still have an uphill battle ahead, and it can only be
won by educating our young, teaching them tolerance and love towards people, animals, our

planet. Although kids do not see colors or gender, so maybe we should let kids teach their
parents how to except one another.

Reference List
Q Salt Lake Magazine ( March 2015, issue 241)
Crooks, R., & Baur, K.(2014). Our Sexuality(12th ed.) Belmont, CA: Wadsworth