The Ten Most Important Sandwiches in American History (by Chris Rapp) 10.

The BLT The BLT edges out a lot of sandwiches to crack the top ten of our list. A lot of you may be yelling out Fuck You! BLTs blow! I understand the debate, I get it people. While there may be better sandwiches out there, this list is about the most IMPORTANT sandwiches in American history. The BLT makes the list because of its emphasis on the food that defines what it means to be an American, bacon. Lets all take this moment to reflect on bacon and how much better it has made all of our livesOkay were back. The BLT was there before the Baconator, before Bacon Grilled Cheese. The influence of the BLT cannot go unnoticed. 9. Fat Sandwiches Made famous by R U Hungry, the Fat Sandwiches have revolutionized the sandwich game. If you dont know what a fat sandwich is, they basically take everything in the kitchen and shove it in a sandwich. You like chicken fingers fatty, how bout mozzarella sticks Tubby McFatfuck, we put that all in a sandwich just for you. That sound good fatass? my first experience ordering a fat sandwich. The fat sandwich represents what we are all thinking, I wonder what it would taste like if I put every greasy food on a piece of bread, and it always tastes like sweet, sweet glory. 8. The Chipwich Boom! I bet you didnt expect this. The Chipwich grabs the 8 spot on the list. The Chipwich rewrites the rules on the sandwich handbook. Chip Wich invented this sandwich in 1963 after he caught his wife cheating on him with the local baker. Chip vowed to never again eat bread! But how could he go on without sandwiches. So, he said you know what I dont need bread to make a sandwich Ill call up my neighbor Famous Amos and tell him to send me over some cookies. The rest was history. The Chipwich is a consistent reminder that we dont need bread to make a sandwich. 7. Meatball Sandwich Here ya go Italians. We all got to admit, you make a pretty sweet meatball, rivaled only by the Swedes. But, this is America so fuck your Italian traditions. In America, we dont use forks and knives we use our hands. The problem is meatballs are too messy to eat with your hands. The solutionMeatball Sandwich. The meatball sandwich is one of the most successful transitions from a foreign staple into and American must have. 6. Breakfast Sandwiches It is often said that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. The problem is, we dont always feel like making breakfast. But one thing there to keep us desiring breakfast is none other than the Breakfast Sandwich. Hey, let me take all this great breakfast food and throw it on a sandwich for ya. Whether youre a bacon egg and cheese on a bagel guy or sausage egg and cheese on a muffin guy, we can all agree Breakfast sandwiches are the shi

5. Philly Cheesesteak The Philly Cheesesteak represents the influence of American cities on our sandwiches. Every city has a signature sandwich, and the Philly Cheesesteak is the first one the pops up in everyones mind when we talk about city sandwiches. The Philly Cheesesteak came about in 1913 when both Steak and Cheese were young 6th graders. The annual dance came around that year, and everyone wanted to dance with Cheese. Steak knew he had to make a move so laid this genius line on Cheese, You may be Cheddar now but by the time Im done with you people are gonna think your Swiss. They made passionate love that night, and nine months later the Cheesesteak was born. 4. The Dagwood The Dagwood, for those that dont know, is simply a bunch of meat and cheese stacked really high between several pieces of bread. While there is not a lot of creativity with whats in the sandwich, the sandwich itself is an engineering wonder. A foot tall stack of meat bread and cheese, the Dagwood is a fearsome and proud sandwich. So, next time you talk about the Pyramids and the Great Wall of China, make sure to bring the Dagwood into the conversation. 3. Peanut Butter and Jelly (PB&J) The PB&J is the classic lunch time staple for kids in America. So, simple, yet so genius. George Washington Carver did a pretty good job inventing peanut butter. But when Malcolm Jelly invented that crape goodness we all love, history was changed forever. And yes I said grape jelly. If you put any other sort of jam or jelly on your PB&J you are a Communist. And by the way, does anyone know the difference between jam and jelly? I cant jelly my cock down your throat. 2. The Burger The burger has been there for us when females havent. When we cry and masturbate in one hand, in the other hand is usually a burger. The burger was there for us when were first learning how to ride a bike, and the burger was there for us when we got our Cleveland steamer. The burger has always been there for us and it always will be, so thank you Burger, for being our real dads. And Finally #1 . . . . . . . .

1. The Rueben Sandwich What?!? The Rueben sandwich beating out the Burger, I bet you didnt see that one. I will explain to you why the Rueben is not only the most important sandwich in America but the most important sandwich in the world. Think for a second about what is in the Rueben sandwichYou got the Irish Corned Beef, the Swiss Cheese, the German Sauerkraut, the Russian Dressing, and the Jewish Rye Bread. All of these cultures are coming together to bring you a great sandwich. Think about that for a second. The Reuben is an example of what can happen if we stop fighting and combine our efforts to make things as glorious as the Rueben. Some Ruebens use Italian Pastrami or Polish Cole Slaw. Thats seven different cultures collaborating to give your mouth a great experience. Not to mention the Rueben was name after one of the greatest Americans to every live in Rueben Studdard. We can all take a page out of the Ruebens book. So, next time youre looking in the mirror, think, How can I be more like the Rueben?