Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Robert J. Wicks
Author of Riding the Dragon
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any
manner whatsoever, except in the case of reprints in the context of reviews,
without written permission from Sorin Books, P.O. Box 428, Notre Dame,
IN 46556-0428.
www.sorinbooks.com
Foreword......................................................................... ix
Acknowledgments......................................................... xiii
Introduction..................................................................... 1
I. Navigating the Perils of Spiritual Intimacy............ 23
Create Simple Rituals................................................ 25
Soften the Soul.......................................................... 37
Honor Life’s Fragility................................................. 47
Face Sadness Directly................................................ 59
Befriend Anger and Other Negative Emotions.......... 71
Honor “Unofficial Retreats”...................................... 83
Appreciate Inner Companions in Hope..................... 89
II. Discovering the Peace, Uncovering the Joy......... 105
A Month of Quotes, Questions, and Spiritual
Themes.................................................................... 107
A Spiritual Mindfulness Questionnaire (SMQ) ...... 145
Suggestions for Navigating Your Responses
to the SMQ............................................................. 151
Epilogue....................................................................... 165
Recommended Readings.............................................. 169
Sources......................................................................... 173
f Foreword
xiii
xiv Prayerfulness
1
2 Prayerfulness
Inner Formation
Inner formation is not a set of techniques to be mas-
tered. Rather, it is an ethos to be absorbed, an attitude to be
cultivated. An abbot once alerted candidates about to enter
a monastery, “There is no training here; it’s just living the
life so it gets ‘into your bones, under your skin.’” Prayerfulness
Introduction 11
is the openness to let life get “into your bones, under your
skin.”
Inner formation is so important for us all because, really,
when you come down to it, the quality of your life depends
upon it. As physician and novelist Walker Percy once wrote,
“What if life is like a train and I miss it?” When we lack
prayerfulness, this becomes more possible than we might
imagine.
Despite the reality of this, though, formation that spurs
spiritual opportunity is often rejected because it requires
real attitudinal change, a true alteration of the heart.
There is an ancient Indian fable that has been told in
many forms over many years that relates this point well. My
version is as follows:
A mouse was constantly anxious because of its dread
of a cat. An angel passing by saw this and pitied the
poor creature. He then turned the mouse into a dog.
Satisfied, he left, only to return several months later
to find the dog now suffering from a paralyzing fear
of a cheetah. Jumping in again, the angel changed
the dog into a lion so it would be relieved once
more of his anxiety. Upon returning months later,
though, he found the lion now worried constantly
about a rogue elephant that lived in the area. Finally,
he turned the lion back into the mouse and said:
“There is little anyone can do for you. Because no
matter what changes are made outside, within you
will always have the heart of a mouse.”
12 Prayerfulness
Three Approaches
First, to deepen our spiritual mindfulness, we must
attentively listen, read, and review the spiritual teachings we
wish to form us. They may come from sacred scripture,
books, tapes, the lives of others, lectures, homilies, lessons,
individual guidance, realizations received during medita-
tion and quiet time alone, or the information in the fol-
lowing pages.
Second, we must be willing to “overlearn” what we have
been taught so our ethos can be firmly formed by it. This
takes time, effort, and study. Possibly, it means rereading
our notes from a meeting we have had with a spiritual guide
or considering a few lines we have written down about a
homily we heard. Maybe it is a notation in our diary of an
enlightening encounter or lines in a book that we highlight-
ed for review later. Whatever it may be, we cannot assume
we will remember or practice the lesson learned if it is not
a part of our easily retrievable memory.
Third, the best way we can know for sure that the impor-
tant spiritual teachings have taken root in us is to practice,
practice, practice. With people we have just met, those we
have as longtime friends, family, and those who seem to
Introduction 15
did not like him very much. They would tell him things
others would not, and he benefited from their insights.
So should we, when we encounter people like that in our
lives.
The message then is: when we join a sense of prayerful-
ness with our intentional prayer in silence and solitude, our
attitude will become transformed. Our whole life will then
become our spiritual life. Without doing this, though, the
perils of seeking spiritual intimacy with God in everyday
life will often not be recognized. The results will not be
good for us or for those in our family or circle of friends
and acquaintances. When this happens, prayer will become
narrow pietism and/or quietism. In instances such as this,
our behavior and attitude will draw few to desire a closer
relationship with God. Prayerfulness produces a sense of
“spiritual mindfulness” even in the darkness of anxiety,
doubt, loss, personal rejection, financial stress, anger, or
sadness. With prayerfulness life can be an amazing learning
experience not only for ourselves, but for those around us
as well.