Marriage Intentions

Kitab an-niyat ( book of intentions)

by Al Habib Muhammad bin Alawi al-Aidarus (Sad)

The Intentions of Marriage

The following are intentions one should have when entering into
marriage. The intentions were composed by the great Shaykh, the Arif of
Allah, Ali bin Abi-Bakr as-Sakran, may Allah shower them both with
mercy.
I intend to enter into this marriage and take this wife (or husband) for
the love of Allah Azza-wa-Jall and to have children so that the human
race shall continue. I also intend [to enter this marriage] for the love of
the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, so that he may take pride
in it, as he said: Marry and increase in numbers, as I will take
pride in you before other nations on the Day of Judgement.
I have intended in this marriageand all the actions and words that
come from itto be blessed by the prayer of a pious child; or for his
intercession if he dies young before me. I have intended by this marriage
to protect myself from Satan, by breaking the desire, [and thus] breaking
the temptations of Satan, to lower the gaze, and reduce the Wiswas
(withdrawing whisperer). I have also intended to protect my private
parts from lewdness (illegal intercourse).
I have intended in this marriage the amusement of the self and to bring
joy to it through by companionship (with my spouse); looking, and
playing freely and to bring comfort to the heart and strengthening it for
worship.
I have intended in this marriage the relief of the nafs and cherish it
through companionship, the pleasure that comes through gazing at ones
spouse, mutual foreplay, the repose that floods the heart and
strengthening it for worshiping.
I have intended by it, the relieving of the heart from the worries of
housekeeping, cooking, sweeping, making the bed, cleaning the dishes
and taking care of lively duties.

I have intended by this marriage, to struggle with the nafs and to train it
through care and guardianship, to fulfill the rights of the family and to
be patient with their characters, to endure the harm that comes from
them, to work towards making them good, to guide them to the religious
path, to struggle to seek lawful earnings for them, to command them to
discipline the children by also asking from Allah for it and success for his
sake and to drop between his hands and to show the excessive need
towards Him in gaining it. I have intended all the previous for Allah
Almighty.
I have intended all the previous and more from whatever I control, say
and do in this marriage for Allah Almighty.
I have intended in this marriage whatever Your righteous servants and
Your acting scholars have intended.
Allahumma, give us success as you have given them, help us as you have
helped them. Overlook our shortcomings, accept [this] from us and do
not entrust us to ourselves, even for the blink of an eye. Make good for
us, all of the previous, by Your Grace and Generosity in good and in good
health.
Allahumma, forgive us and have mercy upon us, be content with us and
accept from us. Enter us into paradise and save us from the hell fire and
make good all of our affairs. Allahumma, grant me in everythingin this
marriage and all of my affairsYour Help, Blessing and Peace. Protect
me from preoccupying myself with other than You and do not put
obstacles between me and Your obedience and make this marriage
sufficient and virtuous for me. Allahumma, Imy moments of
movement and stillnessam entrusted to You, so protect me; wherever I
happen to be, take my affairs as You have taken the affairs of Your pious
servants.
Allahumma, help us, together with our parents, children, spouses, our
Shuyukh, our brothers, all our relatives, all those who come from the
same womb as us, all those who have rights over us, and those who have
the minimum of rights over us. Allahumma, assist me in remembrance of
You, gratitude towards You and excellence in You worship, O Lord of the
Worlds. Allahumma, guide us and grant us success, O Lord of the
Worlds. Allahumma, make us live this life by Your Book and the Sunnah,
O the One who is Majestic and Noble. Allahumma, we ask you by that
which is accepted from us and by whatever brought us closer to You.
Ameen. And send blessings and salutations, by Your Majesty, to the most

noble of all envoys, Muhammad the seal of all prophets, his family and
companions. And all praise is to Allah Lord of the Worlds.
Allahumma Ameen.

Motivations
Seek Allah (swt), His closeness, eternal standing
Develop good character (believers best in faith are
those best in character and kindest to their
spouses nurturing)
Prove your mettle
Take the nafs, lower self out of relationships, then
relationships flourish
Prophetic way/intention (help with cleaning, run
errands pleasing Allah (swt))
Remember marriage as a model for interaction
with creation