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Wednesday, December 3, 2014

A cross-border royal

with 30 guests from India

arriving on Dec. 4, bringing
gifts for the groom's family
as is traditional. After performing the Tikka ceremony, the bride's brother
(in this case her twin Kunwar Pratap Singh) gives the

Gaurav Chavan: We do witness Pakistanis around art and photography as I

mentioned earlier in reference to Mehlum
Sadriwala. But how do you identify them
as Pakistanis as they look like us?
I have an interesting recollection of my
first meeting with Mehlum (the Pakistani
photographer who introduced Gaurav to
Ramsha). We first spoke on the phone and
exchanged hellos. The spoken words were
superficial and there were smiles behind
the tone, just like anyone would talk for
the first time. I had only seen him in pictures and had a different idea about what
he would be like in real life.
When I went to pick him up at the Bandra station in Mumbai, there he stood
with his camera bag on his shoulder
wearing jeans and a t-shirt. I recognised
him because of his beard. And he comes
walking straight, sitting in the car and
'Wassup'! I was wondering what happened
to all the salam and hello and formality.
And suddenly he was a typical young man
just like any Indian amongst us. And
talkative!
So you see, this feeling of alienation
just melts away when we find someone
who is just like us. Here I am talking about
the common people, without any political
trappings.
What is your cuisine? What foods do
Pakistanis like? How famous or wanted is
McDonalds there? What are the youth up
to in their free time? Where do they hang
out?
Ramsha Jahangir: Pakistanis' lifestyle
and cuisine are probably similar to Indians'. Maybe we have more BBQ as most
people are meat-eaters. Pakistanis and Indians for this reason tend to converge at
the same restaurants in the western world.
We don't just share a common language
but also have similar tastes.
The mall culture is becoming trendy

Katas Raj pilgrimage

ver eighty Hindu pilgrims from all over

India visiting Pakistan
for a pilgrimage to their holy
site Katas Raj returned last
week. Pakistan District Coordination Officer Asif Bilal
Lodhi, Assistant Commissioner Choa Saidan Shah Katas Raj temple complex. Photo:
Samina Saif Niazi and other Razaq Vance
officials received the pilgrims. Two receptions were also held for them, at
which hosts and guests exchanged gifts. "You can visit your holy sites whenever you want. You will always be welcomed with love," said Saddiqul Farooq, Chairman Evacuee Trust Property Board. "We should respect every religion. If we respect humanity our problems will solve". "The love and respect
which you people gave us can never be forgotten," said group leader Shiv
Partab Bajaj.
He appreciated the renovations to the holy site, which had been in pathetic condition when he first visited it in 1982.
"These temples are not just worship places but also tourist spots," he
added, noting the scenic value of the area (Salt Range).

The royal bridal couple: with family members at the Roka (ring exchange) ceremony, Jaipur, June 10, 2014
groom a sword which
will have to be foregone
this time due to international travel restrictions
and other gifts.
Thakur Man Singh will
present Karni Sodha the
Lagan the official invitation to the groom and his
family to come to the wedding, which is scheduled to
take place in February 2015
in Jaipur.
This is the first time that
the Tikka ceremony will
take place in Pakistan since
1947 although several
cross-border royal Rajput
weddings have taken place
since then largely due to the
Rajput custom of not marrying within the same family.
Rana Hamir Singh's
mother Rajmata Sahiba
Subhdra Kumari came from
Bikaner, India, when she
married his father the legendary, late Rana Chander
Singh. Karni Sodha's
mother Rani Nalini Prabha
came from the Ajmer royal
family and his three sisters
married Rajputs on the Indian side as did his aunt,
Rana
Hamir's
sister

A funeral ceremony in Lahore

Journalist Sahar Habib Ghazi shared this moving

post by her sister Misha Habib in the Aman ki
Asha Facebook group

Roka ceremony: Exchange of rings between Karni Singh Sodha and

Padmini Singh Rathore
Sangeeta Sodha.
A graduate of SZABIST
in Karachi, Karni Sodha has
worked with a barrister in
Karachi after obtaining an
LLB Honours degree (University of London external
program) in August last
year. These days he is looking after the family farms,
and rises before dawn to do
his daily rounds.
Padmini Rathore at-

tended Maharani Gayatri

Devi school in Jaipur and St
Bedes College, Shimla. She
has a Graphics Design
diploma from Jaipur and
played cricket at the school
and
national
levels.
She lives in Jaipur city as
well as the family's village
Kanota.
The restrictive visa
regime between India and
Pakistan particularly affects

Thakur Man Singh Rathore

with Padmini Singh Rathore
and her twin brother Kunwar
Pratap Singh
the Rajputs of Pakistan.
Forbidden to marry within
their own family, they must
forge marital alliances with
Rajput families in India.
Daughters who are married
across the border always
face a problem in visiting
their country of birth.
Beena Sarwar

here for the urban youth and families to

hang out. Pakistan is industrialising
rapidly. What concerns me is that in this
competitive race for economical stability
and modernisation, are we losing our cultural and histori-

Gaurav Chavan
cal heritage? Archeological
sites like Mohenjodaro suffer from negligence.
Gaurav: What is the music Pakistan lis-

tens to? Any Indian favourites? What is sahab, Mehdi Hassan sahab. There is a
your scene about this in Pakistan?
long list of names that have transported us
Ramsha: In recent years, the Pakto a realm of peace beyond political unistani music industry has been more
derstanding. Farida Khanum, Nusrat
successful than the film industry.
Fateh Ali Khan, Abida Parveen to
There is a great deal of talent
name some that
and of course Pakistanis have
we put on a
made numerous contribupedestal.
tions to Bollywood too. InMusic has
dian music prevails due to
perhaps
Bollywood's popularity but
been the
SERIES 3:V
people also follow Pakonly knot
istan's music talents due to the success of that nothing ever could
Coke Studio and Nescafe Basement.
loosen between us. Look
Music shows are being encouraged, what you have given us,
there's Pakistan Idol and other such Rahat Fateh Ali Khan,
shows. If you discuss this issue with the Adnan Sami, Shafqat
youth, you will find a lot of positivity. The Amanat Ali and now Arif
youth want to promote the arts in Pak- Lohar. I wouldn't be existan. Theatre performances, music and aggerating if I say that
film are emerging as a dynamic industry most of my countrymen
that will flourish if the trend continues. wouldn't know if these
Pakistan's pop music industry and under- even were Pakistanis in
ground bands are more focused and influ- the first place.
ential than their counterparts in India.
Anything you would
Bollywood dominates the arts in like to tell the people of
India. Pakistan does not have a similar my country? A mesfilm industry, but I see individual talent sage on behalf of your
growing here that is set to do wonders people?
in future. A gold mine is my country, difRamsha: Pakistan
ficult to access but once discovered, it isn't is a country full of life. We
easy to let go! Would India agree?
may undergo consistent chaos, struggle to
Gaurav: Thank you for the voices battle our way out the problems that preyou've shared with us despite the separa- vail but despite all odds, we are a nation
tion. Indians have devoured Ghulam Ali that shares an un-detachable bond with

ver the summer a Sikh acquaintance from New

York was telling me how his grandfather Jagtar
Satia's dying wish was to be buried in Pakistan.
When he tried to bring his grandfather's ashes to Pakistan, the embassy refused him a visa. The family laid
him to rest in New York but the sadness and disappointment with which he told me this story made me
feel so bad as I have watched my own maternal grandparents yearning for the land and life of Srinagar.
So I promised I would have a funeral ceremony for
Prayers for Jagtar his grandfather in the Gurdwara in Lahore. And then I
Satia in Lahore. came back to Lahore and life took over.... But finally,
Video grab
this Sunday it happened. Saba Gul, Abbas Akhtar and I
went to the Gurdwara Dera Sahib next to Badshahi mosque and held a funeral
ceremony for him. The Gurdwara in Lahore is one of the three holiest Sikh
places in the world (all three are in Pakistan). We recorded the ceremony for
my friend and his family but I wanted to share our experience as it is a part of
Pakistan most of us rarely get to see. I got really lucky because the head of the
Gurdwara was there and he conducted the ceremony.

The concluding part of an online cross-border discussion between two young people,
Gaurav Chavan in Mumbai and Ramsha Jahangir in Karachi

Feedback, contributions, photos, letters:

Email: amankiasha@janggroup.com.pk
Fax: +92-21-3241-8343
Post: aman ki asha c/o The News,
I.I. Chundrigar Road, Karachi

Indian Hindu pilgrims visiting Pakistan received

"love and respect"

When alienation melts away

THE FIRST STEP

LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK

A handshake and a smile

Amarkot: Akbar's birthplace. Photo: Beena Sarwar

t is a measure of
the poor relations
between Pakistan
and India that a routine meeting, a smile
and a handshake, becomes news.Indian
and Pakistani Prime
Ministers Narendra
Modi and Nawaz
Sharif's handshake at Indian PM Narender Modi and Pakistani
the recent SAARC PM Nawaz Sharif: Smiles at Saarc. AP photo
summit in Kathmandu raised hopes that the two countries would restore the ceasefire along
the Line of Control (LoC) and resume dialogue.
That the leaders of Nepal and other countries tried to facilitate the icebreaker speaks for how India Pakistan relations affect the region.
"Nepal was making efforts not only for a handshake between India and
Pakistan, but we were also trying to bring closer the minds of the two leaders,"
said Nepalese Foreign Minister Mahendra Bahadur Pandey.
He added that the President of Afghanistan, Ashraf Ghani also played an
important role in breaking the ice and that "the effort was made collectively by
all SAARC leaders as well".
Analysts hope that the stalled peace process will resume after Modi and
Sharif's interaction at the concluding session of the Saarc summit.
As a first step, the ceasefire along the LoC and the working boundary must
be restored, before a meeting between the two foreign secretaries.
India had cancelled the foreign secretaries' talks in August in protest at the
Pakistani high commissioner's meeting with Kashmiri leaders in New Delhi.
In October, ceasefire violations by both armies along the LoC and working
boundary killed at least two dozen people, mostly civilians, on both sides of the
frontier. Sharif has said that Pakistan must focus on economic development
and stressed that good neighbourly ties have to be on the basis of equality.

here is great excitement in the

Rajput community in India and in Pakistan
about the forthcoming wedding of two princely families from either side of the
border involving the Tikka
ceremony that will take
place in Pakistan for the
first time since 1947.
The young couple,
Kunwar Karni Sodha of
Amarkot (Umarkot), Sindh,
and Padmini Singh Rathore,
of Thikana Kanota, Jaipur,
exchanged rings at a Roka
ceremony in Jaipur on June
10 this year, five days after
they first met at a relative's
house.
Karni Sodha is the son of
Rani Nalini Prabha and
Rana Hamir Singh of
Amarkot. The historic town
is famous as the birthplace
of Akbar (later known as
The Great) after the then
Rana gave sanctuary to the
Mughal king Humayun who
was fleeing Sher Shah Suri.
The bride Padmini

Rathore's father Thakur

Man Singh Rathore owns
the Narain Niwas Palace
Hotel in Jaipur city and
hotel Castle Kanota in his
principality, Kanota.
The Tikka (formal engagement) ceremony will
take place at Rana Jagir,
Amarkot, on December 7,

The Modi-Sharif meeting in Kathmandu raised

hopes and underlined differences between India
and Pakistan

Rajput wedding

The Rajput 'Tikka'

ceremony in
Amarkot on Dec
7 will take place
in Pakistan for
the first time
since 1947

India. Never was India so important to me

before, but getting to witness it so closely
has made me realise and identify how unthinkingly caged Indians and Pakistanis
have been over the years. Look closely
people, where does the divide persist? It is
all a matter of perception. Today I
have developed respect
for India, not
because the
situation has
changed. But
rather because
I have come to
realise we're all
the same. We
are one; after all
we are sons of
the same soil.
Think. Accept.
Change within!
I'd like to express immense
gratification to
you, Gaurav, for
this opportunity
to interact. It is iniRamsha Jahang
ir
tiatives of this na-

ture and magnitude that instigate the process of change. Thank you India! Thank
you for instilling recognition and determination for this effort. Here's to a bright future with acceptance and beyond!
Namaste from Pakistan!
Gaurav: A resolution: This year, India
celebrated its 68th Independence Day. I
conceived this discussion for this day to
move beyond the apprehensions we harbour about each other. I am aware of the
political situation between us. But this is
just another version, perhaps more real, of
reality.
This is the story of ordinary people
who, wherever in this world, are always ignored. Some might have irreconcilable
views about this. Some may continue to
hate. But that's their choice. I choose to
know, to believe and to hope. I pledge allegiance to my country and am proud of
being an Indian. At the same time I pledge
obedience to compassion, to tolerance and
to this human race.
A generation of hostility is too much to
live with. Let them hate who have surrendered to hatred. If you haven't, celebrate
this freedom in acceptance. Let ordinary
people from both sides meet. No high security meeting point, but a common melting point. No elaborate luncheon, but a few
sweet words. No obligatory superficial
handshakes, but open arms for an embrace. No third irrelevant party involved,
but just the two that matter.
Nafrat ki aag jalaogey to mohobbat ki
roshni hogi,
warna log jab bhi jaley hai, raakh hi
hue hain.
Salam, from India.

Gaurav Chavan lives in Mumbai; a copywriter by profession, he prefers being

a thinker. Ramsha Jahangir in Karachi is a Social Science student, a thinker at
will, a writer by choice. Read Gauravs response, and a continuation of this discussion, in the next installment of the Conversations series in Aman ki Asha.
A peace initiative whose time has come...

Destination Peace: A commitment by the Jang Group, Geo and The Times of India Group to
create an enabling environment that brings the people of Pakistan and India closer together,
contributing to genuine and durable peace with honour between our countries.