You are on page 1of 7

One of the most important matters in a teenagers life is a romantic relationship.

Much of their time will be spending on talking, thinking and engaging themselves with romantic
relationships, (Pham, Keenan, Han 2013). Romantic relationship affects strongly on teenagers
emotion positively or negatively as opposed to other kinds of relationships such as relationship
with friends, parents or teachers, ( Furman and Shaffer, 2003).
There are several definitions of romantic relationship or dating according to
psychologists and researchers. Sugarman and Hotaling (1989) defined dating as an interaction
that focuses on the involvements of both parties that gives the advantages to them which support
interaction in the future, emotional commitment which lastly will lead to sex. Heinburg (1990) in
his study concluded that dating is different from normal interaction as it requires a commitment
from both parties that are currently dating one another. It is helpful to the development of
interpersonal competence. In order to foster relationship romance, one would seek to develop his
intrapersonal competency.
In a study conducted by Furman, W., & Wehner (1997) found changes in the selection
of friends happen by mid-adolescents (14 to 15) when teens start having friends and become
attached to them. Due to this phenomenal they feel attracted to the opposite sex and will start
dating. Teenagers who do not have friend to date found to have low self-concept and have
communication problems. According to J.M, (2000) Dating is a kind of reaction, entertainment,
to attain a social status, to fulfill a persons egoism need in oneself and an opportunity to
accomplish the sexual need. It has the power to improve a social status of a teenager. Hence a
teenager who is able to attain a dating partner in school will be more well-known within their
peers and will have a high self-esteem.
One of the factors that contributes to romantic relationship is the relationship that they
have with their parents. This is because the relationship that they have will affect the tendency of
selection of their friends. In a study conducted by Alden et al (1995), it is found that teenagers
who live with single mothers, single parents or who are raised by their grandparents will start a
love affair very early compare to teenagers who have stable family relationship. On the other
hand, adolescents who receive attention and love from their parents will be more outstanding
academically, more sociable with friends and will engage slowly in a love affair.

It is often believed that romantic relationships may negatively affect youth


academically because they spend most of their time with their partner and might distract one
from schoolwork, and there are a lot of studies that support this claim, (Chung, Keenan and Ham,
2013). Some of the earliest studies that were conducted regarding this matter were by Grinder
(1966), Larson et al. (1976), and Simmons et al. (1979), found that there is a correlation between
students romantic relationship in high school and their CGPAs or other test scores. Most
students who have romantic relationship will have lower CGPs. Other researchers also reveal the
same finding concerning this matter. Halpern et al. (2000) reported negative associations
between academic achievement and romantic relationship in early adolescence. Quatman et al.
(2001) found that students who date frequently (more than twice per month) show lower
academic achievement and motivation.
However a recent study by Chung, Keenan and Ham, (2013) discovered that dating
generally do not have a serious negative impact on educational outcomes, however dating
frequently or the involvement on the sexual activities will jeopardize the students academic
achievement. Serious dating, consisting of early sexual intercourse and a high dating frequency,
showed a significant negative impact. Interestingly students who date moderately do not show
any negative impact on their school achievement. Conversely, dating moderately will give a
positive effect on students, moderate dating did not show any impact on high school graduation,
but showed a positive impact on college enrollment compared to non-daters, (Chung, Keenan
and Ham,2013).
There are several possible reasons that show dating frequently and sexual involvement
could be harmful for the students. These activities may stray them away from studying.
Moreover, at this tender age, the students are not experienced enough to handle such serious
complicated relationship. Although Rector, Johnson, Noyes & Martin (2003) only found early
sexual activity to be linked with negative health outcomes such as increased rates of STD,
abortion, and depression.
Dating will lead to other circumstances such as Pre-marital sex. In Malaysia a survey
conducted by Universiti Teknologi Malaysia, indicated that over 10% of secondary school
students were sexually active, with many of them having had multiple sex partners. With

Teenagers are becoming more sexually active, doctors are raising concern over this matters as
they receive more and more cases of child out of wed-lock, (The Star, 2013).
According to statistics by the National Registration Department from the year 2000 to July
2008, they recorded more 257,000 births that were registered without the fathers name. This
means that on average 2,500 cases of illegitimate children were recorded every month or almost
84 cases per day. In the states of Malaysia between 2000 and 2008 showed that 70.430 children
are registered out of wedlock. Selangor had the highest number of illegitimate babies, with
12,836 babies. This follows by Perak, 9788 babies, Kuala Lumpur, 9439 babies, Sabah 8.435
babies, Negeri Sembilan, 4,108 babies, Sarawak 617 babies and Terengganu with the lowest
number, 574 babies only.
The statistic of illegitimate babies according to races within stated that Malays and
Bumiputeras of Sabah and Sarawak, have the highest number of illegitimate infants with 20.949
babies , Indian the second highest with 19,581 babies and Chinese with the lowest Rate of
illegitimate babies, with 18.111 babies. The breakdown according to religion shows that Muslims
have the highest percentage with 30,978 illegitimate babies follows by Hindu with 18.085 out of
wedlock babies, then Buddhist with 17.236 babies and Christian with 3,395 illegitimate babies
(UKM News Portal, June 2010). This statistic shows that the number is increasing every year.
The definition of pregnancy out of wedlock is being pregnant before marriage in which
the existence of sex between two couples who did not have a valid marriage relationship.
Teenagers who are pregnant out of wedlock are between the ages of 13 to 18 years old, (Unicef,
2008). This phenomenon is increasing and becomes more worrying to Malaysians in building an
ethical nation, (Alavi, Nen, Ibrahim, Akhir, Mohamad, Noorhasliza, 2012).
The problem of pregnancies among teenagers in Malaysia has reached the alarming
level with the nation recording 1048 cases from January to March last year, (NST 2014). In
other words this can be translated into an average of 12 teen pregnancies a day. This also has
been the highest number of teen pregnancies in the country in four years. The number of
maternal deaths among teens also has risen from 17 cases last year to 4 cases this year from
January to March this year.

There are a lot of factors that contribute to pregnancy out of wedlock but lack of parental
guidance has been identified to be the main source of this problem, (Abdul Rashid, 2014). Most
parents are too occupied with their work and fail to give the full attention to the children
especially to supervise their social activities. Some of them thought that by this age their children
will be independent enough to take care of themselves. However little that they know that by this
age their children still need the attention and it is crucial for the parents to still give them this
attention. The parents also need to know the circle of friends that their children are being with
and who they go out with and etc.
This claim is supported by a study conducted by Alavi, Nen, Ibrahim, Akhir, Mohamad,
Noorhasliza,( 2012), who interviewed six teenagers that were pregnant out of wedlock. Six out
of six teenagers claim that they have family problems and do not have a strong relationship with
their parents. When the child and the parents have a weak relationship, the teenagers will prone
to go out and have social activities that perhaps will lead to sexual activities, (Ummi
Khaltum,1995). In such situations, children will trust their peers more than their parents.
Due to these overwhelmed issues of teenage pregnancies and baby dumping, Malaysias
baby hatches are providing place for the unwanted babies. Hence mothers who do not want the
babies or could not keep the babies can place their babies at the baby hatches. Four years since it
was opened in 2009, the center has saved 133 babies in three of its branches in Kuala Lumpur,
Johor Baru and Kota Baru. The number keeps on growing with the average of three babies permonth.
The center reported that they receive the babies from women who left their babies at the
centers who were between the ages of 15 and 32. Most girls stated that their parents were
unaware of their pregnancy. Hence because they are afraid to inform their parents about it, they
left their babies at the center. Out of 133 babies left at the three baby hatches, 50 of the young
mothers had a change of heart and decided to keep their babies after speaking to counselors
there. The centers took in 83 babies, all of whom have since been adopted. The ratio of the
babies according to races is 52 were Malay, four Indian, two Chinese and 16 other races. The
races of another nine were undetermined as they were left there by mothers who wanted to
remain anonymous. Forty-five were girls and 38 were boys.

The other problem that has been a concern for the parents and educators are the new
trend of scratching their boyfriends name by the teenagers. Mostly only girls will do such an act.
While still in high school, many girls now are seen to slash their arm until it bleeds to write the
name of their lover, it is supposed to be in the name of love for the girls. They use a small knife
or a needle to poke the arm in order to produce scars that seem like tattoos. This trend is mostly
disclosed by school teachers and counselors in school. This act is done by teenagers because
most of them are being influence by their peers. This act is performed by the girls in order to
show their loyalty to the boyfriends (Ahmadi, 2013). He also stated that girls wont feel any
guilty and will stand the pain due to the feeling of love that they have hence they will lost all of
their judgment and conscience. Moreover, in school these days, this act has become a
competition among the teenage girls. Those who have the longer scar will be considered as the
most daring and cool among the peers, ( Metro, 2013).
In Malaysia, cyber bullying sometimes are targeting on couples. One of the most
cases of cyber-bullying on couples is the case of Alang and Afiqah, (Metro, 2014). This
happened when Alang posted their lovey-dovey videos on the Internet and it went viral.He
received a lot of negative comments by the viewers and they also condemned the parents. Then,
a newspaper made a special report on him and the girl about the frustration and shame that their
parents have to face. Due to this incident, he also has to change his school. Alang and Afieqah
lso faces a lot of depression and frustration due to this incident. The effect of cyber-bullying is
seen to affect teenagers psychologically tremendously as Victims of cyber bullying are literally
humiliated in a worldwide venue which can occur 24 hours a day. "The bully is spreading
information on the Internet for anyone to see and that can affect someone's social life, especially
how other kids at school view them. It can also affect the person academically because their lack
of confidence will prevent them from contributing and asking questions in class," Louis Cobb,
2007.
Malaysian government has implemented a lot of ways to curb the problem regarding the social
issues that is contributed by teenage relationship especially regarding the teenage pregnancy.
One of the issues that the government plans to conduct is the implementation of the sex
education. It is still has not been implemented due to some objections from many people.
However the topic has already been included in the school syllabus but not as a subject by its

own and it is just a brief part in the other subjects like in biology, moral, Islamic study and
physical education (Malaysian Digest, 2009). If this program is implemented, some might argued
that, the teachers are reluctant to teach it because they lack of confidence in the area (Scott &
Wight, 1996; Hendry et al., 1995). Nonetheless it is vital to teach this subject since sexual
transmission is the most common mode of transmission of HIV, it is important for the students to
know about safe sexual behavior and this topic should be included in sex education subject in the
school curriculum (UNESCO, 1994).
Recently The National Population and Family Development Board (LPPKN), has
suggested a new module to teach the students about sex education and how to avoid pre-marital
sex. A selected batch of Form Three students would undergo a two-day, eight-hour workshop
where they will be taught the consequences of having premarital sex that leads to unwanted
pregnancies, sexually-transmitted diseases (STDs) as well as alienation from the society. It
focuses on preventing students from engaging in any sexual activity. The module educates
teenagers on risks that can lead to sex. Students would be taught how to identify situations and
conditions under which they might be tempted into having sex through a yellow warning and
red warning categorization. Yellow warning means that sex will happen probably takes place if
they are not careful .Red warning however, is when a couple finds themselves in a situation
where they are alone and where things might get out of hand. In this situation the module teaches
them techniques on how to refrain from having sex to rejecting a sexual advance.
Love is something that is normal for human beings and something that we could not
control. The religion of Islam itself never forbids its followers from falling in love, "Islam didnt
make it Haram for you to fall in love, it didnt forbid you from wanting someone, it only guides
that love so it protects you, her, your families and especially saves you from humiliation on
judgment day." - Nouman Ali Khan. Hence it is essential for the parents to penetrate Islamic
teaching to their children to prevent them for doing such immoral thing and to make them a
better person who knows the right way how to love one another. This also can be implemented
by the non-muslim to teach their children about the values that they should have as it believed
that all religions do not promote pre-marital sex.

You might also like