*Firstly, are you a feminist? And so what does this mean?

What is your definition of

feminism?

Yes. I am 33 still single and have only met two men that I could honestly say spending even some of the rest
of my life with would be better than staying single, the rest haven't matched up to that standard. My AMEX
has purchased men more drinks and presents than they have bought for me and I pay for all my own
excessive bouts of consumerism through earning more than every man I know of my age and plenty that are
older. How could I not be?

There is no one definition of feminism and the gender has beaten itself up since time trying to apply the term,
which in general means fighting or having equality with men. Whatever "equality" actually means. Feminism
means different things to different women who were born at different times and the only common thread to
the debates are its participants - women. Mind-numbing debates have ensued over years trying to label
women and at many times an emerging lesbian movement has hijacked feminism. Entire taxpayer funded
academic industries exist to discuss, debate and define feminism. When it is much easier than that:

Feminism is about a woman striving to be exactly who she wants to be.

Because if she is achieving that then this endless quest to be "equal" to men is a train with no passengers.

* Labels, do you have labels for different types of feminists. As well as third wave I
have heard talk of left-wing versus right-wing feminists. Any views on such labels
would be appreciated please? Are there ‘opposing factions’ as such? How do you
classify your brand of feminism?

I won't enter the laborious open-ended debate about what sort of feminist I am or not. There's no such thing
as "third wave" feminism or left and right wing feminism. The stereotypical feminist according to the Michael
Laws' of the world, and one that is very much hijacked by the lesbian movement, is a humourless woman
who goes out of her way to be as unattractive as possible, carries a chip on her shoulder from bad
professional or personal relationships with men and probably votes Labour or the Greens employing more
likeminded women to surround herself with. These women do exist but I definitely don't fit into that category.

* As a feminist (assuming you answered yes to Q1) what are the burning issues
today? And what is your stance on them? Some suggestions are: Motherhood
versus career/abortion/day-care/earnings inequality/sexual exploitation in
media/women’s rights groups – eg student officers and Ministry of Women’s Affairs.
As already mentioned please let me know the issues you are especially interested in
and your stance on them?

The largest issue facing feminism that has still yet to be solved by the gender is accepting men into your life
who are bad for it, this is where I believe most of the answer to perceived inequality lies. Still there are too
many women who count themselves as strong, successful and intelligent, in oppressive relationships that are
either violent or emotionally abusive. These women would rather be in a bad relationship than be single and
embrace one's singleness. While women have a tolerance for men who are violent and emotionally abusive,
men will continue to behave this way because they get away with it. All these women would be better off
being single than in these relationships but fear being single. These women need a man to complete
themselves as a human being and quite often in the upper-monied classes, their credit rating and social
status.

In terms of motherhood v career, most of the aggressive debate centres on stay-at-home mothers wishing to
have a working woman's lifestyle (ie. income flow and freedoms) without any sacrifices that such a woman
makes. I personally do not care if a woman chooses to stay home and be a mother because in terms of
feminism she is being exactly who she wants to be but she needs to be realistic as to what that means. I've
had one tell me that she wished that she could travel where I do (which is for almost a third of the calendar
year all around the world living in hotels) and have her husband give her the sort of income I do. Well some
days I would like to run off to Lake Como to live with George Clooney but that's not going to happen either!
Her attitude says it all really given she has no idea of the sacrifices required in order to get to the position I
have, again not advancing the gender is it?

Women are no more exploited in the media than the lovely Dan Carter is standing objectified in his Jockeys.
And long may that continue! In terms of objectification, men usually don't even notice what shoes a woman
is wearing or whether she's got a new hairstyle. Women go to these lengths almost entirely to stamp their
mark and compete over other women so any exploitation based on the need to look fabulous is really the
gender's own fault. I say what's wrong with it anyway, I am not embarrassed looking at pictures of semi-
clothed gorgeous younger or older men? In terms of body image it is market demand plain and simple. I
don't wish to open a glossy magazine and read about fat, ugly or poor people or see that on television.
Because no one in the world wakes up aspiring to be fatter, uglier or poorer than they are. That's a fact of life
and I have friends who rely on keeping their body in trim for modelling and TV work. They have incredibly
disciplined lifestyles and work very hard at their appearance. No one should begrudge what they are doing,
let alone tell them they need to gain weight to be a "better rolemodel". That's PC nonsense.

The Ministry of Women's Affairs is a disgrace to New Zealand women in the year 2009 and should be
disestablished.

In terms of business, after going to extraordinary lengths to ban men from congregating in groups such as
private clubs, women are for example setting up their own "old boys" network which is totally the wrong
approach to progressing the gender. The woman leading for example "New Zealand Global Women", Mai
Chen, went into business with Sir Geoffrey Palmer, carries his name and trades off it still when he actually
left the firm in 2005. That's not progression, that's pretty sad if she didn't have the self-confidence to carry it
all herself given her qualifications, ability and background. Plenty of women who are supposedly successful
businesswomen have in fact either inherited money, intellectual property, favourable loans, positions in a
company and security from their fathers or husbands. That's not progression or something to aspire to
either. Neither is a woman who has stolen wealth they would otherwise never have achieved on their own
from a man in a relationship property or marriage settlement. That does nothing to enhance the role of
women or feminism.

Women will get respect from men and only get respect from men when they actually do it all themselves
without relying on men, other women or thrusting their estrogen in the face of a man to get ahead. If they are
not on company Boards then try becoming shareholders instead? Who wants to in this day and age of
director liability, be a public company director anyway? The fees are third-world and the responsibility
draining.

A fascinating international example I see in Hong Kong is the role of housework and gender. Hong Kong
local women from middle-class families are frowned at by their parents if they marry a man who cannot keep
them in the style they are accustomed to. These women have at least one maid and do no housework. They
also are not expected to work once married. Likewise in Italy for example, men have high enough incomes
such that women do not need to work. New Zealand men simply do not have that earning power or wealth
base and so New Zealand women have had to work to support the living standards to which we now aspire.

Such transfer of economic power has been the real progression of New Zealand women over any concerted
effort by women to gain this mystical "equality". And yes, it all comes down to money because that shifts the
balance of power between genders. When it is clear you have your own money and have earned it, men do
treat you differently to women who have not as they cannot control you the same way they would a woman
who is dependent upon them. It doesn't make you "one of the blokes" at all as you never will be, it just means
they will treat you with more respect than a woman who views a man as a meal ticket so your relationships
with men become more meaningful and enlightening and you also see how self-centred other women are to
pushing these men into earning more so they can buy the dependent women more material items. It can be
quite a shock.

* Also, you mentioned that your brand of feminism isn’t a traditional one. So could
you explain to me firstly what is a ‘traditional feminist’ and how you see yourself as
differing from that.

I guess the stereotypical traditional feminist is a bra-burning, man-hating woman bitter at their lot. These
sorts are a dying breed thankfully and some have splintered off to the radical end of the lesbian movement.
Young women now do not carry this anger, and this upsets older women who think they are nonchalant about
for example when a silly older man pinches their bum at a bar and makes crude comments about women.
Any lack of caring is directly equivalent to the esteem that we probably earn more than the sad old coot and
are more than capable of dismissing him from the area if so offended with a crushing comment that will
crucify his existence. Again, it is a matter of self-confidence. If you have it then you don't care so much about
what others are saying and doing around you.

* Finally, do you have any feminist role models who you look up to – NZ or
international. And if so, who are they and what do you find inspiring about them?

I don't have any role models as such male or female, however like most women my age, we can look back at
our Grandmothers as a good gauge of progress of the gender and most of it comes down to self-confidence
that creates your own opportunities given a bit of hard work and application.

My Grandmother went through her whole life believing she was stupid, so much so that she didn't attend my
graduation because she had some silly idea in her head that she wasn't worthy to even watch the ceremony.
When in reality she was extremely well read, literate and had strong rather educated opinions. However she
didn't have the self-confidence to express any of it even right up to her death. While my Grandmother had
the excuse of her times, no woman in New Zealand in the year 2009 has the same excuse for lack of
confidence not to be exactly who they wish.