Supervised Writing to Topic to Essay

Below are some sample prompts, along with some essay titles derived from responses to
those prompts:

Work Sample prompts Essay titles

The Hour To what extent are the two primary How Lispectors rhetorical
of the characters affected by the backdrop purposes are served by the
Star against which Lispector places them? conclusion of The Hour of the
(Clarice Star
How far would you estimate the ending of
Lispector)
the novel to be successful and on what
grounds?
Broken There is clearly emotional 'electricity' The interactions between Diana
April created by Kadare between Diana and and Gyorg and their effect on
(Ismail Gyorg. How is this included in the plot Bessians character evolution
Kadare) and to what effect?
The chapter on Mark Ukacierra, the
steward of the Kanun, provides a number
of points of interest and clarification in
the novel. How do you see Mark's role in
the novel?
The What single minor character do you judge Lieutenant Mamiyas
Wind-Up to have a critical effect on the unfolding contributions to the plot of The
Bird quest of the protagonist Tom? Wind-Up Bird Chronicle
Chronicle
Particular events in Japan's history are Murakamis use of the
(Haruki
imported into the plot of the novel. Manchukuo and the Nomonhan
Murakami
Discuss Murakami's inclusion of one or incidents in enriching his novel
)
two and their effectiveness.

Narrowing your essay topic

decide precisely on which topic you will pursue out of one of your pieces of supervised
writing
refer back to your text and decide whether you have a topic that is both true to the
way the work is developed and for which you can gather enough evidence to support
your argument
conference with your teacher about the topic you have chosen. At this stage, it would
be useful to have a short outline of the way you plan to proceed.
look carefully at the criteria that will be used to evaluate your essay. They are as
follows:
- How much knowledge and understanding has the student shown of the work
studied in relation to the assignment?
- To what extent does the student appreciate how the writer's choices of form,
structure, technique and style shape meaning?
- How effectively have the ideas been organized and how well are references to the
passage integrated into the development of the ideas?
- How clear, varied and accurate is the language?
The draft
This should be a clean copy without technical errors such as spelling and punctuation.

The text used and its translation should be cited.

Any secondary sources used should be properly and faithfully cited.

Source: Tyson, Hannah and Mark Beverley. IB Course Companion: English A Literature. Oxford University Press:
2011. Print. 136-140.
 Sample: Supervised Writing to Essay

Read the following piece of supervised writing and the essay that grows out of it. It should
give you a sense of how an essay can evolve from a prompt through supervised writing to a
final essay.

Prompt: How far would you estimate the ending of The Hour of the Star to be successful and on what
grounds?

In Clarice Lispector's The Hour of the Star, the ending is extremely successful; perhaps even the most
significant part of the book. In the final eight pages of the book, from the moment Macabea steps into the street and
is run over, to the final statement "Yes" (86), the ending ties together all the themes and messages of the novel with
one clarifying thread: the narrator's personal experience. Rodrigo presents the reader with his own experience of
writing the ending, which makes the experience suspenseful as Rodrigo discovers the events of the plot at the same
time as he presents them to the reader and reacts profoundly to each development. Through Rodrigo's reflections,
the significance of the book's themes is clarified: it becomes clear that the book is entirely Rodrigo's story, and
Macabea and his readership both exist to serve his experience. The ending is at once suspenseful, as Rodrigo keeps
Macabea alive, saying "the hour has not yet come" (82) and comfortingly resolving, as Macabea "become[s] more
and more transformed into Macabea, as if she were arriving at herself" (81). Rodrigo also brings the reader into the
story very directly one last time, admonishing when Macabea is dying, "Pray for her and interrupt whatever you're
doing in order to breathe a little life into her" (82).
Rodrigo's own experience in writing the book is also forcefully summed up in the ending, as he emphasizes
his deep involvement in the plot. He speaks of this "great joy" when he finds that the "hour has not yet come for the
film-star Macabea to die" (82), claiming that he "shall do everything possible to see that she doesn't die" (80). And
yet she does die, and his reaction is chaotic, as he seemingly goes mad, saying, "I am innocent! Do not devour me! I
am not negotiable!" and bemoaning that "all is lost", he "cannot laugh", and finally says, "Macabea has murdered
me" (85).
These aspects are only a few of the many that Rodrigo brings together in his ending, skillfully bringing
together the story into one scene of great impact.

Essay Title: Effectiveness of the ending in Clarice Lispectors The Hour of the Star

In the ending of The Hour of the Star, Clarice Lispector brings the plot to a powerful close in one climactic
scene of Macabea's death. The scene is at once suspenseful, as Rodrigo keeps Macabea alive when she is dying,
saying "the hour has not yet come" (82), and comfortingly resolving, as Macabea "become [s] more and more
transformed into Macabea, as if she were arriving at herself" (81). Lispector uses this scene to skilfully tie together
all the book's themes, from the theme of words being similar to music to the theme of life and death, thus leaving
the reader with a clearer image of what Lispector intended to convey. In this scene, Lispector also brings the
narrator, Rodrigo, closer to his readers, and clarifies Rodrigo's role in Macabea's story, which helps to resolve the
confusing relationship between Macabea's plotline and Rodrigo's.
The first important effect in the end scene is the clear merging of Macabea and Rodrigo's stories. This
scene emphasizes that The Hour of the Star is more Rodrigo's story than Macabea's. This is conveyed when the
climactic event of Macabea's death is overshadowed by Rodrigo's personal reactions, as he bemoans that "all is lost,
and the greatest guilt appears to be mine", and even claims, "Macabea has murdered me" (85). His reaction to her
death is so strong that he seems to go crazy, saying, "I have been to the land of the dead and after the most
gruesome horrors I have come back redeemed. I am innocent! Do not devour me! I am not negotiable!" (85). This
focus on Rodrigo at a moment that is so important to Macabea's story reminds the reader of Rodrigo's statement at
the beginning of the book, when he said, "obviously I am one of the more important [characters]" (12). Clearly, not
only is Rodrigo one of the most important characters, as he may have appeared throughout the book, but he ends up
being the most important character. This makes explicit the message that is present throughout the book: that
Macabea's story is significant only in the context of Rodrigo's experience. This clarification is helpful because
previously in the book, although Rodrigo is highly involved in the narration, it is unclear whether he still intends
for Macabea's story to be a story on its own or simply to be part of his own story. When this scene completely
merges Rodrigo's story with Macabea's, it helps the reader to better understand the rest of the book as each scene
fits into the context of Rodrigo's experience and no longer needs to fully make sense from the perspective of
Macabea's experience.
Besides providing clarity and closure, Rodrigo's direct involvement in the final scene also creates suspense,
as he speaks of his "great joy" when he finds that the "hour has not yet come for the filmstar Macabea to die" (82),
and then claims that he "shall do everything possible to see that she doesn't die" (80). His continual comments that
create suspense, such as "I don't believe that she is going to die, for she has so much will to live" (83), increase the
effectiveness of the resolution when Macabea does die and "is finally free" (85).
The second important effect in the end scene is the way Rodrigo brings the reader so directly into the story.
Although Rodrigo addresses his readers directly in many parts of the book, the final scene involves the reader to an
exaggerated degree, to the point where it almost seems as though the reader is one of the characters in the story.
Towards the beginning of the closing scene, soon after Macabea is hit by the car, Rodrigo admonishes his readers,
"Pray for her and interrupt whatever you're doing in order to breathe a little life into her" (82). A few sentences
later, he brings the reader into his statement that "life is a punch in the stomach" by preceding it with, "Let my
reader take a punch in the stomach and see how they enjoy it" (82-3).
This reader engagement is powerfully emotive because it keeps readers from reading the scene from a
detached perspective, and instead makes them feel as if they are directly involved in Rodrigo's creation of the plot
and therefore gives them a feeling of responsibility. Rodrigo even seems to seek the reader's approval of the plot,
saying, "I have just died with the girl. Forgive my dying. It was unavoidable" (85). In the context of this scene, the
particularly strong reader involvement increases the emotional impact of the scene as the reader is presented with
Macabea's death after having been asked to "pray for her", and becomes directly involved with Rodrigo's despair as
he pleads, "forgive my dying" and "Do not devour me!" (85). In the context of the whole book, Rodrigo's direct
words to the reader bring closure to the whole plot, as he ends the book by first closing Macabea's story in her
death, then his own story by saying "now it only remains for me to light a cigarette and go home" (86), and finally
leaves the reader alone to think of a broad and somewhat unrelated issue, "the season for strawberries" (86).
The third and final aspect of the closing scene that I find particularly effective is the way it brings together
the important themes in the book. Rodrigo does this particularly effectively by using one theme that runs through
the book - that of music and silence - to weave through the entire final scene and to bring up references to other
themes in the book. Each statement that involves music in the final scene is powerful and simple. Firstly, Rodrigo
uses music to clarify for the reader his own perception of death, saying, "I know that when I die, I shall hear him
playing and I shall crave for music, music, music" (82). Secondly, he uses music to conclude Macabea's story,
saying, "I now understand this story. She is the imminence in those bells, pealing so softly" (85), and then defines
Macabea with a musical metaphor: "At heart, Macabea was little better than a music box sadly out of tune" (86).
This is a powerful way for Rodrigo to conclude Macabea's story because the aural imagery of bells "pealing" and a
"music box sadly out of tune" is very clear and emotive. The third way Rodrigo uses references to music and
silence is in connecting back to the beginning of the book. For example, his statement in the final scene, "I hear the
ancient music of words upon words" (84) ties back to the connection he makes at the beginning between writing
with making music, saying, "Those words are sounds transfused with shadows" (16). In another part of the final
scene, Rodrigo's statement, "Silence. Should God descend on earth one day there would be great silence" (85)
seems to use silence to bring Rodrigo to the conclusion of his desire to discover the world and its God (18). There
is also specific aural imagery created with silence, so that the reader can visualize "Macabea [struggling] in silence"
(82) and can feel the "silence ... such that thought no longer thinks" (85).
Clearly, by referring to music and silence in the final scene, Rodrigo effectively brings together many
themes, creates emotive aural imagery, and provides a clear and emotionally impactful conclusion to Macabea's life
and to his own reflections on death.
In conclusion, the ending of The Hour of the Star is very effective for many reasons. It is very climactic,
providing clarity and resolution for the reader by concluding Macabea's plotline, which ends in her agonized death,
in the context of Rodrigo's experience. The climactic effect is enhanced by Rodrigo's references to music and
silence, which in themselves are themes that run through the book, and are also used to tie together other important
themes and therefore provide resolution and closure to the complex story. The clear aural imagery created by the
references to music and Rodrigo's particularly direct involvement of the reader also adds to the emotional impact of
the scene, strengthening the conclusive messages that Rodrigo conveys.

(1352 words)

Works cited:
Lispector, C. 1992. The Hour of the Star. Trans. Giovanni Pontiero. New York. New Directions Paperbook.
Felstiner, J. 1980. Translating Neruda: The Way to Macchu Pichu. Chicago. Stanford University Press.

Examiner Comments:

The supervised writing begins some lines of discussion that will develop in the essay, such
as the portrayal of the voice of Rodrigo through his expression of his attitudes toward
Macabea and the suspense the candidate sees emerging. The question of where Lispector
has placed her focus - Rodrigo? Macabea? - is also raised.

In the essay, the candidate elaborates on some of these points and adds another, the
relation of words to music in the novel. Life and death, words, silence and their relation to
music are considered, as is Rodrigo's relation to Macabea as the teller of her tale.

In terms of the four descriptors for the essay, the essay delivers a strong sense that the
candidate has detailed knowledge of the text and a good deal of perceptive insight into the
characters and their construction. However, the candidate could have provided a more
ample demonstration of the merging of the two characters. In 1352 words, the candidate
would have had an opportunity to explore this strand of the argument.

The candidate provides sufficient evidence of knowing how to express an appreciation of

the author's choices, using the appropriate terminology (climactic event, suspense,
metaphor, aural imagery, for example) and showing in particular the choices governing
structure and their effect.

Ideas are persuasively organized, although there is some sense that a tight structure has
excluded some further textual evidence and development of the argument. One almost has
the sense that a rigid structure has taken precedence over considerations of delivering full
treatment of the materials to the reader.

Language is accurate throughout as well as effective.