[Roberto] – Moving business - Lan 2

Task 2: Traffic and accommodation problems are increasing and government should
encourage some business to move from cities to rural areas. Does advantages
outweigh the disadvantages?

In this day and age, more and more contemporary attention has been placed on the opinion
that relocating factories and companies from metropolitan areas to rural areas in order to
solve such municipal problems as transport and accommodation are among the major Commented [i1]: Ê sao sai grammar hoài vậy, số its
concerns of governments. In my perspective, the merits of this development outweigh the chứ sao số nhiều, sai grammar nhiều là 6.5 trở xuống
nha
drawbacks for concrete reasons below.
Commented [i2]: Ê mà viết gì gì vậy trời tự nhiên bữa
nay xã hội quan tâm đến ý kiến là moving…. Là nỗi lo
Firstly, the most remarkable advantages of moving businesses to the countryside is that this lớn của governments em thấy chị dịch tiếng việt vậy
em có thấy hợp lí k mà viết mắc cười vậy nè, viết lại
policy could make a great contribute to mitigating the traffic density in big cities. This means nộp lần 3 lại đây
that traffic congestion caused by the incredible flow of commuters would be reduced
Commented [i3]: Câu này thì hay
because streets would not be crowded with vehicles' commuters during rush houses. A good
Commented [i4]: Số ít chứ sao số nhiều
case in this point is Ho Chi Minh city, traffic jams always took place in the past but this is
Commented [i5]: Gặp chị là k viết màu mè như này
now no longer the case, Because local authority created favorable conditions for enterprises luôn
and factories with many incentives so as to relocate in rural areas like Binh Duong province,
leading to the traffic in Ho Chi Minh city has been significantly improved. Obviously, the = this policy certainly mitigate the traffic density in
some big cities, for example HCMC
movements would decrease the traffic congestion in big cities.
Commented [i6]: As a matter of fact, In fact

Secondly, the accommodation problems including scarcity of land and exorbitant housing Học cách dung từ nối cho chính xác lại em
prices in major cities would be resolved by transferring of firms. Indeed, the large areas of Commented [i7]: Commuters’ personal vehicles
land are released thanks to the movements of factories and organizations, making room for Commented [i8]: Where
the construction residential areas. This will lead to the fact that the price of houses will fall Commented [i9]: Used to be a pressing issue
and urban will have more chances to buy houses to settle down in some big cities. For Commented [i10]: But now it is no longer the case
example, Ho Chi Minh city administration has been implementing a variety of important
Commented [i11]: Has created / provided/ offered
resettlement projects in the available land areas acquired by moving companies to the
Commented [i12]: Ê sai grammar hoài vây
countryside. As a result, a large number of low-income and homeless people can have
possession of decent houses. = leading the traffic in HCM to significantly be
improved

In conclusion, based on above-mentioned justifications, I firmly believe that the relocating Commented [i13]: ê mà đọc kĩ lại câu này xem, thấy
viết câu có mệnh đề phụ because mà không có mệnh
enterprises to regional areas brings a large number of advantages than disadvantages ./. đề chính thấy k ?
Commented [i14]: , including
Commented [i15]: firms transformation
(333 words)
Commented [i16]: people đâu ?
Commented [i17]: local authority nha
Attempts: 2
Commented [i18]: good dung thì này nhiều vào
Commented [i19]: hoặc dung từ affordable
December – 19 – 2017