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Insatiable
By Barry Graham
published: November 05, 1998

This week, let's talk about adultery. About illicit

blowjobs. And about perjury. Better yet, let's talk about a
guy who does all of those things. Let's pick a guy who not
only cheated on his wife by getting multiple blowjobs (so
he could say he hadn't "had sex" with the other woman),
but also served her with divorce papers while she was
sick with cancer.

And, for the perjury, let's pick a guy who lied about
something serious. Same guy as above. A guy who lied
under oath 13 times about his illegal use of campaign funds.

What? You don't want to talk about Newt Gingrich? Neither does Congress.
Okay. Let's just get dirty. Let's just talk about another naughty boy, Congressman Bob Barr. He's the
sponsor of the "Defense of Marriage Act." He should be--he's fond of marriage. He's currently on his
third. But, in 1992, someone videotaped him licking cream off a woman's breasts at a fund raiser. And
the breasts didn't belong to his wife.

What? You don't want to talk about Bob either? Neither does Congress.
But you want to talk scandal, right? Okay. How about Henry Hyde? Helen Chenoweth? Dan Burton?
No? You don't want to talk about them? Well, you're not alone. Neither does Congress.

All Congress wants to talk about is this bubba from Arkansas, this roadkill-munching middle-aged
horndog who happens to be president and whom most people think is doing a pretty good job of it.

And Congress wants to do a little bit more than talk about him. They want to impeach him.

For what?
Not for adultery, they say. But for perjury. Lying under oath. A serious matter.

Well, it would be a serious matter if he'd lied about something serious. But he didn't. He lied about
adultery. Who wouldn't, assuming they had, in fact, committed it? Isn't lying necessarily a part of
adultery?

Unless we as a society are going to turn primitive and criminalize adultery, nothing criminal has
happened here. A guy stepped out on his wife, lied about it, got caught and was forced to confess.
Hardly the stuff of True Crime.

This is the fourth column I've written about Bill Clinton since blowjobgate first made headlines. When
I told people I was about to write the third one, they groaned. When I told them I was about to write
this one, the response was almost unanimous. "I'm sick of hearing about it. It's gotten old."

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They're right. And I'm sick of hearing about it, too. And it has gotten old. For everyone outside of
Congress, that is.

And it's because of the relentless right-wing witch hunt in Congress that another column like this has
become necessary.

Congress supposedly exists to represent the will of the American people. The same is true of the
president. And, judging by his popularity, the American electorate does feel that Clinton serves them,
when he's not busy serving his hormonal urges.

But there can be no argument that Congress is representative of the American people. Even though 66
percent of the voters want this scandal to be over, want to forget Clinton's private life and let him get
on with the job he's been hired to do, the Republicans in Congress won't listen. Desperate to make
political capital of it, they're treating Clinton like he's a reincarnation of Richard Nixon, and trying to
oust him from office.

Not only are they ignoring the wishes of the people who elected them, but they're failing to do their job
in any way at all. While these little boys and girls were busy oohing and aahing over the president's sex
life, a massive, complicated budget was passed--and most of them didn't know what the hell was in it.
Weighing 40 pounds and standing 16 inches tall, it funds dozens of federal agencies and includes
compromises on expenditures on such trivial matters as the International Monetary Fund, relief for
struggling farmers, funding for the military and hiring teachers.

But why would our elected representatives trouble themselves with the budget when there's a dirty
story to snigger at?

It's not only Democrats who're sick of it.

"Censure and Move On" is an organization made up of Democrats, Republicans and independents. Its
goal is simple, and is summed up by its name: It wants Clinton to receive a censure for his behavior,
and then be allowed to finish his final term as president.

The organization works entirely through the Internet (www.moveon.org), asking people to sign a
petition to be presented to their representative in Congress. As of last week, it had collected 258,000
signatures across the country. In Arizona, it collected 4,629.

Kathe Morton is one of the Arizona organizers. Last Thursday she presented 615 signatures to
Congressman Ed Pastor's press secretary. "That was a good number," she says. "The district covers
South Phoenix and a chunk of Arizona going down to Yuma, and in those areas not that many people
have Internet access. So it's a good turnout. The Internet is going to be a strong tool for democracy as
more people participate."

Morton works as a research specialist at ASU, where she's also a student, studying for a master's
degree in public administration. She's far from the blinkered Democratic party activist I'd imagined.

"I'm a registered Democrat, because you have to be a Democrat or Republican to vote in the primary,"
she says. But her sympathies incline toward the Libertarian party. And, in the gubernatorial election,
she'll be voting Republican. "I'll have to vote for Hull because Johnson hasn't made a statement. He
hasn't said what he stands for."

Morton got involved with the Censure and Move On campaign simply because "I thought it was

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important. The movement is totally nonpartisan, with a very simple message."

And the response from Congressmen?

"Ed Pastor's people were very nice. Maura Saavedra, his press secretary, said she was glad to hear from
the other side. Pastor voted no to impeachment, but his position now is that he wants to go through
the judicial process and move on. Now that it's started, he favors taking it to its conclusion."

Congressmen J.D. Hayworth and John Shadegg were also given petitions, but Matt Salmon was rather
less cooperative. "He's blowing off the people," Morton says in exasperation. "He wouldn't even
provide an assistant to meet with people. Everybody else at least offered to have someone meet us.
Apparently, most of the Congressmen were out of the state this week. . . .

"I think it's sad that we have to spend any kind of natural energy on this. I think they were all out of
their heads, jumping on this bandwagon."

And does any responsibility for this farce lie with Clinton?
Morton acknowledges that Clinton could have kept it from happening. "Had there been some honesty
at the beginning--if he'd just said, 'Yeah, I did it and it's none of your business, so I'm not going to talk
about it'--it would have been a blip in the news and then gone away.

"But what we need to do now is make sure the rest of his presidency isn't wasted time."

Contact Barry Graham at his online address: bgraham@newtimes.com

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