Always Being Right Is Wrong for Your Health

People with a very high estimation of themselves and little respect for
others wind up experiencing more stress and anger as they deal with
a world that constantly disappoints them. Thinking yourself always right
is neither a helpful social trait nor a sound health habit. See the value in
other people’s perspectives, even if you highly value your own.
“FEELING THAT YOU are better than everybody else, or feeling that you
are always right, might seem empowering. But really it’s mostly isolating.
It leads to a tremendous amount of tension,” says Dr. James Coyne,
a professor of psychiatry at the University of Pennsylvania.
The medical implications are great, he adds: “We’ve seen everything
from tooth decay to ulcers to heart problems linked to this very basic
ability to get along.”
In addition to avoiding medical problems, the ability to feel connected
to others aids the recovery process from disease. “Even when
your own determination to get better wavers, the connections to others
put you back on track,” Dr. Coyne says.
Ultimately, bullheadedness can turn into a matter of life and death,
according to Dr. Coyne’s work. Dr. Coyne and his colleagues videotaped
heart patients’ arguments in their homes and grouped them according to
the negativity of their interactions. Those heart patients who were more
negative toward the other person in arguments were 1.8 times as likely
to die within four years as those who were less negative. “That’s powerful
stuff,” Dr. Coyne says.
Researchers found that 62 percent of absolutist thinkers— people with a very
high opinion of themselves and a low tolerance for compromise—suffered
from high levels of anger and stress, which depressed the functioning of
their immune systems. (University of Bradford 1999)