Professional Documents
Culture Documents
news
Bishop Checkmates Election
By Najib Aminy
It turns out that Bill Clinton’s visit
to Stony Brook earlier this year will not
be in vain; Republican candidate Randy
Altschuler conceded to incumbent Tim
Bishop for the 1st District race on De-
cember 8.
The former president’s November
visit rallied support for the now five-
term incumbent Tim Bishop days be-
fore the midterm elections that brought
roughly 300 students to vote on cam-
pus. The two-hour event had cost the
Bishop campaign roughly $30,000.
At the time, Bishop held a relatively
comfortable low-double digit lead in the
polls over Altschuler.
Just weeks before Altschuler con- Najib Aminy/ SB Press
ceded, the lead narrowed and flipped Former President Clinton with newly-elected five-term Representative Tim Bishop rallying at Stony Brook days before the 2010 midterm election.
Editorial Board
Executive Editor
editorials
Najib Aminy
Managing Editor
Nick Statt Leaking Away Our Freedom
Associate Editor
Evan Goldaper When Daniel Ellsberg released Knights Party and Christian Con- incoming chair of the House Home-
the Pentagon Papers in 1971, he did cepts, both supported by the Ku Klux land Security chair Peter King had
Business Manager
Kenny Mahoney so with the intention to end what he Klan, as reported by The Guardian’s sent a letter to U.S. Attorney General
viewed as a wrongful war in Vietnam. technology editor, Charles Arthur. Eric Holder urging that he and Sec-
Production Manager His leak, 7,000 pages long, brought And these companies are com- retary of State Hillary Clinton prose-
Carol Moran
light to the American public that its pletely within their rights do business cute Assange for his role in providing
News Editors government and leaders had been with companies and organizations the leak and working with Private
Amanda Douville lying to them about Vietnam and had that clash with current social norms, Bradley Manning, who is allegedly
Bobby Holt shrouded its unconstitutional activi- because it preserves the promise and responsible for providing WikiLeaks
Features Editor ties in Cambodia, Laos and coastal security of the Freedom of Speech the classified information.
Desiree Keegan North Vietnam in secrecy. and Press as protected under the First “By the sheer volume of the clas-
Arts Editor WikiLeaks has since sified materials released,
Liz Kaempf trumped Ellsberg’s leak with rendering harm to the
its recent trove of docu- United States seems in-
Sports Editor ments and cables that have evitable and perhaps ir-
Matt Maran
provided classified informa- reversible,” read the
Photo Editor tion ranging from the Iraq letter that King had ad-
Carolina Hidalgo and Afghan wars to diplo- dressed to Holder.
Copy Editors matic cables about current “Moreover, the repeated
Zach Knowlton U.S. foreign policies. releases of classified in-
Alyssa Melillo And since starting in formation from Wik-
Social Media Editor 2006, both WikiLeaks and iLeaks, which have
Kenny Mahoney its founder and Editor-In- garnered international
Chief, Julian Assange, have attention, manifests Mr.
Ombudsman been under attack. Assange’s purposeful in-
Tia Mansouri
WikiLeaks has reported tent to damage not only
Layout Design by
Jowy Romano multiple attempts to disrupt our national interests in
its servers and Assange has fighting the war on ter-
Staff been under a media barrage ror, but also undermines
Vincent Barone of character assassination, the very safety of coali-
Raina Bedford
Michelle Bylicky primarily based on allega- tion forces in Iraq and
Lionel Chan
Mike Cusanelli tions of rape. Shortly after Afghanistan.”
Eric DiGiovanni
Brett Donnelly the Afghan Logs were re- But those in higher
Amanda Douville
Lauren Dubinsky leased in late July, Swedish chairs of government
Lauren Dubois
Andrew Fraley
officials had dropped the and involvement in areas
David Ginn
Mark Greek
charges but then reopened like the military have
Colleen Harrington the case in early September. dispelled this rhetoric.
Samuel Katz
Desiree Keegan Assange has since surren- “Now, I’ve heard the im-
Iris Lin
Chris Mellides dered himself to authorities pact of these releases on
Alyssa Melillo
Erica Mengouchian in London and is under ar- our foreign policy de-
Carol Moran
Frank Myles rest for the time being. Amendment. scribed as a meltdown, as a game-
Alex H. Nagler
Howie Newsberkman
More noticeably, there have been This political pressure comes changer, and so on,” said Secretary of
Jessica Rybak
Emily Torkel
shameful and repulsive efforts within after hundreds of documents have re- Defense Robert Gates in response to
Matt Willemain the U.S. to disparage and cripple fi- vealed sensitive and embarrassing de- the recent Wikileak dump. “I think
nancial and hosting services to Wik- tails between U.S. dignitaries and those descriptions are fairly signifi-
About Us iLeaks, as companies like Amazon, their respective counterparts, a cry cantly overwrought. The fact is gov-
The Stony Brook Press is published fortnightly
during the academic year and twice during sum- Paypal, Mastercard and Visa have that has since turned to threatening ernments deal with the United States
mer session by The Stony Brook Press, a student
run non-profit organization funded by the Student since ceased their services after suc- our nation’s security. because it’s in their interest, not be-
Activity Fee. The opinions expressed in letters, ar-
ticles and viewpoints do not necessarily reflect cumbing to political pressure. These Days after the Thanksgiving re- cause they like us, not because they
those of The Stony Brook Press as a whole. Ad-
vertising policy does not necessarily reflect edi- same companies offer their services lease of diplomatic cables, Long Is- trust us, and not because they believe
torial policy. For more information on advertising
to racially-driven sites like the land Republican Representative and we can keep secrets.”
letter
Is The Press Getting Soft?
So I can’t say I really get to read the Press all that much Now, I don’t mean to call out any of the current staffers. I ab-
anymore since my graduation, but I do manage to read it some- solutely respect the time and effort you put into writing and ed-
times. Unfortunately, law school reading keeps me fairly busy. iting the paper (trust me I know), but bring back the fun. Push
Ok, fairly is not the right word, at all. Law school keeps me so the boundaries. Write things that get you border line sued. If not
busy I couldn’t even continue to write my column, like I said I for yourselves, at least do it to pay respect to the staffers that
would when I graduated two years ago. But there is one thing came before you. Pay homage to the road we paved for you;
that is striking to me. Has the Press gone soft? the road that was layered with dirty condoms, explicit lesbian
I was in class today and got a bit bored because it was the sex stories, and Beerfests. Do it because you can still do it. Trust
review session, I clicked over the Press’s website to see what me; once you graduate you won’t be able too. If you do de-
was going on in the Stony Brook world. I was shocked. What cide to go to law school, grad school, med school, or any other
happened to pushing the boundaries? What happened to all “professional” institution you will be forced to write dry articles.
the satire? What happened to the reviews of porno, and pic- You will no longer be able to write anything inappropriate. Se-
tures of tits? Has the Press gone soft? What I found was actual riously, push the envelope while you still can. Bring back the in-
news. A real report of what was going on at the Brook, not that appropriateness of the Press we all grew to know and love. Put
there is anything wrong with real news, but at the same time, the dildo back on the wall.
there was no octopus covered in condoms. There was no
dildo stuck on the wall. Did the Press’s sense of humor retire Ilyssa Fuchs
with Shirley Strum Kenny? Is the new provost enforcing a strict Press Alum ‘07
rule against having any fun?
6 Vol. XXXII, Issue 7 | Thursday, December 9, 2010
news
Evaluate This!
By Najib Aminy
The ten minute period given to stu-
dents toward the end of each semester
to evaluate their professors and courses
may soon come to an end.
That’s due in part to a recent Teach-
ing Learning and Technology depart-
ment push to move the course
evaluations online.
“The biggest issue is not really how
the data is being collected, it’s about
how the data is being presented once it’s
collected,” said Graham Glynn, assistant
provost for TLT, about the push for an
online evaluation system.
“It’s a specialized tool that gives the
faculty in-depth information and more
ways to look through the information Carolina Hidalgo/ SB Press
An online course evalutation program is currently being tested in hopes of replacing the paper-based evaluation system pictured above
than they could through a paper-based
report.” better a class or teaching style. The The biggest challenge for the suc- sented before the University Senate
Instead of passing around golf pen- process to record this data used to be cess of this online course evaluation early in the Spring semester.
cils and scantrons filled with standard- both time-consuming and arduous. pilot program will no doubt be the par- “I am hoping the university says all
ized questions criticized as outdated “The comments are considered the ticipation. The TLT department is of- of these should be public,” Glynn said.
and unhelpful, students in roughly 10 most useful feedback the faculty could fering a free iPad that is to be awarded “I think it’s a good way to encourage
percent of total courses offered at Stony get,” Glynn said. “But it takes a huge randomly to a student who completes faculty on improving courses.”
Brook are being asked to evaluate their amount of effort to get it done-- about all of his or her online evaluations. But there is some hesitation in
professors and courses online. three to four months. “There is a concern over the num- making the whole evaluation transpar-
For the pilot program, the ques- With the online system, staff assis- ber of people who will participate,” said ent due in part to the comments.
tions remained the same online as those tants will no longer have to spend hours Cover, who passed around slips re- “They are sometimes flippant,” said
asked in the paper evaluation to keep sifting through paper evaluations at- minding his students to go online and Cover, who is in support of keeping the
the survey controlled, said Glynn, tempting to decipher students’ script. critique the class. “You no longer have questions themselves public. “I’m just
though a committee is in the works to The idea of moving to an online evalu- them sitting in class and filling out the not sure how illuminating that would be
revamp the types of questions asked. ation system becomes only that more form but telling them to go off and do it [to students] when they are scurrilous.”
“They basically have taken the old lucrative when one considers the wide on their own.” While there won’t be any chilis or
questions and put them online,” said Al- range of budget cuts that have hit this The way to remedy that is to offer frowning emoticons in the online eval-
bert Cover, undergraduate director of university and their impact across de- an incentive. For instance, offering extra uation being piloted at Stony Brook, it
the Political Science department. “The partments. credit points if more than 50 percent of won’t be long before this becomes a
qualms I had before are still the qualms “We are significantly saving a lot of the class completes evaluations. standard practice, at least according to
I have now.” time and effort with this, more than Going online also offers another Cover.
No less, the online surveys offer a what we are paying ,” said Glynn, whose opportunity for students-- their very “It’s obviously going to be what hap-
glimmer of efficiency and quality in the department is paying a few thousand own hyper-local database of course rat- pens, no question. We will be moving to
future of course evaluations at Stony dollars to the company SmartEval for ings and professor evaluations, a more an online system,” he said. “The only
Brook. Take the comments section, the pilot program. To use the complete refined RateMyProfessors. With the question has to do with whether the on-
where students will take the opportu- service for all of Stony Brook’s courses, pilot program, professors have the op- line system makes any substantial
nity to lament against a professor or the online course evaluation system tion of making their evaluations public, changes in the evaluation.”
offer some sort of insightful analysis to would cost roughly $25,000. but Glynn said this matter will be pre-
The Stony Brook Press 7
features
Nobel Hall LEEDing the Way
While the building was in con- Goshow Architects, who have been agrifiber, both rapidly renewable mate-
struction, the architect kept track of the working with LEED for over 30 years rials. “Outside of just the conservation
By Amanda Douville points that the building would receive. now. of the environment, it’s also proven to
Every little sustainable effort the archi- Goshow, the architect group who be a healthier and more responsible way
The grass by the recently built tect put into the project counted as designed Nobel Halls, had worked on for ourselves to live,” said Knuff
Nobel Halls is designed to be mowed points towards the final rating. the project to ensure the highest LEED During construction, all paints,
twice a year and never watered. Sur- “One of the items that I think was rating possible. The $50 million, 604- sealants, adhesives and composite wood
prisingly, it’s not because of budget cuts, worth two points on the landscaping bed facility went into construction 2 products that were used contained no
rather it’s green, both economically and side was no irrigation; so no sprinklers years ago while design plans date back added urea-formaldehyde. According
physically. or water,” Sparano said. The plants, trees as far as 2007. Kellie Knuff, the manager to the United States Environmental Pro-
It’s rarely watered because it’s in- and grass that were put down by land- of Business Development for Goshow tection Agency, urea-formaldehyde’s
digenous to Long Island, and as a result scapers are all indigenous to Long Is- Architects, talked in a phone interview health effects include “eye, nose, and
saves the University money by avoiding land. Because of this, they are able to about the importance of Nobel Halls throat irritation; wheezing and cough-
a sprinkler system. This is just one of survive without the help of humans. LEED certification as well as building ing; fatigue; skin rash and severe allergic
the many measures taken to make the The yearly rainfall of Long Island is green in general. reactions.” The agency’s website also
new Nobel Halls just a little friendlier to enough to keep the plants and trees “Sustainable design creates healthy mentioned that in high concentrations
the Earth. healthy without the help of sprinklers. living environments,” Knuff said. and over long periods of exposure,
From planning, design and con- Since the grass around the dormi- Healthy living conditions are important urea-formaldehyde may even cause
struction the Yang and Lauterbur Halls tory is only mowed twice a year. Con- to every human, especially students cancer.
have been carefully implemented The building also con-
as Stony Brook University’s first tains motion sensors on pub-
completed “green” building on lic lights and on
its main campus. What makes it heating/ventilation/air condi-
green is the LEED-certification, tioning systems, which con-
or Leadership in Energy and En- tribute to the energy
vironmental Design certifica- efficiency. “Those two things
tion that the building will be alone are a huge, huge reduc-
soon receiving. tion in energy consumption,”
In charge of the entire certi- said Sparano. He also said
fication system is the United that a green building would
States Green Building Council. help cut energy costs as op-
The Washington-based non- posed to building a regular
profit organization has been dormitory.
working on educating and su- The University spends
pervising green projects about a quarter of a million
throughout the U.S. since 1993. dollars on electricity a week.
In order to LEED-certify a Sparano said that the figures
building, it must meet certain on the new building could
criteria off the Green Building not be given out yet since they
Rating System. The system, a were not yet calculated. But
registered trademark of the U.S. regardless of the exact num-
Green Building Council, allots ber, the building is guaran-
points to various aspects of the ventional gas powered mowers do not who are constantly surrounded by un- teed to save the school money. “We can
construction, design and operation of have to be used as often. In the end, the healthy elements. “The use of natural spend our resources elsewhere like on
the building. absence of mowing allows less carbon lighting makes people happier for ex- the academic side rather than having to
When the dormitory building was emissions to contaminate the atmos- ample. There’s less toxins in the materi- keep our lights on,” Sparano said.
first being designed, those in charge of phere. als used; people get sick less.” In about a month, the building will
the project at the University were aim- Achieving the highest possible Natural lighting is just one of many be awarded an official LEED certifica-
ing for the highest rating possible. John LEED certification rating was the Uni- initiatives implemented into the design tion. Nobel Halls is just one of many ini-
Sparano, the director of campus resi- versity’s main goal. But while the build- and construction of Nobel Halls. An- tiatives that Stony Brook University has
dence operations, was put in charge of ing has many benefits, it is also very other example would be the exterior implemented towards their goal of sus-
the project back in 2007. expensive. “Platinum would have been cladding of the building, which was tainability. F. Eric Goshow, A.I.A, LEED
“In the beginning of this project, perfect, but then cost comes into play,” constructed with insulated metal pan- A.P. and a founding principal of
everybody had the same expectation said Sparano. But while Stony Brook els that allow the building to better sta- Goshow Architects, has spent over 30
which was to achieve the best possible was working towards sustainability, bilize internal temperatures throughout years in the field of sustainable archi-
scenario,” Sparano said in reference to thousands of others were doing just the the year. When a building is thoroughly tecture.
the rating. The rating system allows same. insulated, heat does not escape as easily “Sustainable design is key in pro-
buildings to achieve one of the four cer- As of February, the U.S. Green saving money on additional heating. In viding healthy living and learning envi-
tifications ranging from bronze to plat- Building Council had over 18,500 addition, the materials used for the ex- ronments,” Goshow said in a phone
inum. Many factors including materials members including architects, building terior were of recycled content. interview. “With these initiatives play-
used, landscaping and energy effemi- companies and various organizations On the inside of the building, the ing a major role in formative years, stu-
nacy go into determining the rating of a striving to build green. One member floors were made with linoleum while dents learn early on how to incorporate
building. company of USGBC architect group the core of every door was made with sustainability into their daily lives.”
8 Features Vol. XXXII, Issue 7 | Thursday, December 9, 2010
The Graduating
ficult, because they have to pay for ben-
efits,” said Lipack. “But if they take a
look at the company and where it could
lead them, it could offer them some
Healthscare
great opportunities.”
Most students concede they have
not given much thought to where they
are going to get their health insurance
By Joe Arico once they leave the university.
“I don’t think about that kind of
stuff cause my parents have always
taken care of it,” said senior Alex Chau-
Like many colleges, Stony Brook health insurance with Aetna. This plan herself lucky. vin. He is a sociology major scheduled
University is a stepping stone for young covers things like inpatient hospitaliza- It was a very stressful situation,” to graduate in May. “It always seemed
men and women on the path towards a tions, outpatient mental health visits, said Glowatz, who spent the first few so far away,” he said. “And it’s not ex-
better life, one enriched with education prescription medicines and pre-existing months of her life as a college graduate actly the top thing you think about wor-
and culture. But when it comes to medical conditions. Students are al- searching for a job and health insur- rying about once you’re out of school.”
health insurance, students might be bet- lowed to waive the health fee if they’re ance. “There was nothing I could do
ter off if they never leave. covered by their parents’ health plan, about it.”
Students graduating from college but it must cover everything that the Glowatz suffers from asthma. Trips
may find themselves wondering where university’s plan does. to the pulmonologist and the medica- “It always seemed so far
their health insurance is coming from, President Barak Obama’s health re- tions necessary for her condition can
and they may not come to a simple an- form bill allows children to stay on their become expensive for someone without away, and it’s not exactly
swer. Most Americans receive their parents health plan until the age of 29 health coverage, but it’s still nothing the top thing you think
health insurance through their em- in New York and 30 in New Jersey (in compared to the coverage itself.
ployer. But an unsteady job market and most other states the age is 26). This A plan that would offer the same cover- about worrying about
weak economy have taken this option covers only a few graduates. age that Stony Brook University or a once you’re out of
off the table for some graduates. Elana Glowatz, 22, graduated from parents’ plan would is likely unafford-
Undergraduates at Stony Brook Stony Brook in the spring and recently able for most new graduates. Empire
school.”
are required to have health insurance to got a job with the Times Beacon Record Blue Cross Blue Shield asks more than
enroll in classes, but most get it without newspaper company in Setauket, and $1,200 a month for an individual health
having to do much thinking. All stu- will soon start to receive full health cov- plan. Oxford plans are more modest at “I’m not worried about it at all,”
dents are being charged a fee of $486.25 erage. It took longer than she would around $500 a month, but require a de- said junior business major Justine
by the university this semester for have liked, but she said she considers ductible between $2,000 and $3,000. Chang. “I will get health insurance
The Stony Brook Press Features 9
E-mail The Press at
editors@sbpress.com
well. When I told my Asian friends that Tiongson said she believes that the ing students to transfer “ said Tiongson. American Studies program. Sometimes
the Asian and Asian American Studies dismantling of smaller departments af- “Among my peers who know about it works like a well-oiled machine.
program was on the chopping block fects everyone at Stony Brook, even if what is happening, those that are Asian There is a real synergy,” Mukhi said.
even the biology majors got offended.” he or she is not an Asian and Asian Studies majors are left asking, ‘Now Mukhi also added that if the program is
Tiongson added that although the American Studies major. Tiongson, an what do I do?’ Tiongson added that al- dismantled, the Wang Center will not
departments are smaller in comparison English and psychology major, said she though the degree is still attainable, lose any of its importance instead she
to other majors Stony Brook offers, it is was originally attracted to Stony Brook going through several other depart- said it would make it more important.
not by the program’s choice. She said because of its great diversity and al- ments to take the classes make it seem “You have to fill a gap,” she said.
she feels that the small size of some de- though she would not consider trans- like a hypothetical degree Sridhar is not as convinced. He
partments directly correlates with Stony ferring, she finds the compounding of As for the Wang Center, Mukhi said, “Asian Studies provided an intel-
Brook choosing to allocate all of its smaller departments debilitating. “Tak- said it has been bolstered by the Asian lectual backbone for the Wang Center.
money into the science, math and re- ing [the Asian and Asian American and Asian American Studies major and Programs held there compliment Asian
search-oriented departments. Studies. One will not be as strong with-
Mukhi said that the university is out the other. If you make the Wang
meeting with the consulting group, Center part of a non-specified unit, it
Bain & Company Inc, to get the most loses focus.”
out of the budget. “They are famous for Mukhi is adamant in saying that
reducing the budget at [the University the potential consolidation of the pro-
of California at] Berkeley. It was effi- gram is not set in stone. “Anxiety is un-
cient but it included a lot of firing and derstandable but the dean of Arts and
early retirement packages,” she said. “ Sciences has listened to our confusion
‘If your job is redundant why are you and it is being reconsidered,” she said.
here?’ is their feeling. I think I’m im- The most disconcerting aspect of the
portant but they may not.” combination of programs is the fear
Frank Pinto, a managing partner of that when the program is dismantled it
Bain & Company Inc. has confirmed will lose some influence. “What trou-
that it is working with Stony Brook to bles us who are very dedicated to keep-
make significant budget cuts. Accord- ing the Asian and Asian American
ing to Pinto, Bain & Company, Inc is Studies program integrity and ex-
still working to understand the univer- tracurriculars, is when the program is
sity’s current budget. dismantled it loses some clout and
Mukhi is not a proponent of the everything we work for may be dis-
disbanding and potential combination solved.”
of the Asian and Asian American Stud- Sridhar is certain of one thing—re-
ies programs. Although she said she moving the Asian and Asian American
understands the need for the university Studies department would be a disaster.
to save money, she said dispersing the Besides the disbanding of the depart-
program is not necessary. “On paper, ment being offensive, he said, “Every
[the idea] looks good, but intellectually decent university has a department of
it is challenging,” said Mukhi. “Sepa- Asian Studies. Some of them are 100 or
rating the program affects its integrity. 150 years old. We are just a baby. We
Where is the intellectual integrity about should nurture it.” Sridhar also said he
teaching Asian and Asian American believes there have to be other ways to
Carolina Hidalgo/SBPress
culture? When languages and cultures The Wang Center fountains have been shut off due to budget cuts from Albany
manage the budget without cutting de-
are taught, they are not taught sepa- partment. “Most universities are going
rately. You learn literature and theory. out of their way to have an Asian Stud-
Just because it is not an English lan- Studies program] away would lower fu- supports the program. “The Wang ies program but [Stony Brook] is letting
guage why is it being treated like a ture student interest in the school, and Center is a venue for extra curricular it go. For what? To save a cof-
Rosetta Stone class?” will persuade a lot of currently attend- activities related to the Asian and Asian feemaker?”
12 Vol. XXXII, Issue 7 | Thursday, December 9, 2010
features
The Stony Brook By Natalie Crnosija
Budget Cut
As the hands of lecture hall’s clock funding for our academic areas has His sentiments were mirrored by Moiz Khan Malik, the Undergradu-
struck 7:30 a.m., 448 students were ex- gone down by 13.9 percent.” This year, a fellow student Sal Caiola weeks before ate Student Government’s director of
pected to take their seats in the hall’s total $24 million was cut from Stony during a phone interview. “The class is Event Planning and former USG treas-
floor or on its balcony and click in. This Brook University’s state budget and it way too early,” he said. urer, said students believe that the uni-
Wednesday Classical Physics lecture has sustained a $62-million cut in state Provost and Vice President of versity did not lobby the state correctly
had almost full attendance. As students funding over the past three years, said Brookhaven Affairs Eric Kaler said the and that the state did not correctly rec-
walked in, some murmured about click- Maciulaitis. The SUNY system, of budgetary challenges the university is ognize the importance of SUNY.
ing in and then falling asleep. A hand- which Stony Brook is part, lost $635 facing are significant but emphasized The possible restructuring of the
ful just clicked in and left. The rest of million, or 30 percent, of its funding that preserving the university’s aca- SUNY system was a focus of Stony
the students, like sophomore Wasif over the past three years, according to demic mission is of chief concern. Brook campus media after Gov. David
Iqbal, stayed. Later in the semester, the Casey Vittamo of the SUNY communi- President Samuel L. Stanley Jr. “has Paterson included the Public Higher
biology major said that budget cuts cations office in an Oct. 19 email. made it very clear that academics are Education Empowerment and Innova-
were likely to blame for the scheduling “As a result, campuses are employ- the priority of a university and that’s tion Act in his 2010-2011 budget before
of the class’ single lecture section at this ing a number of different methods in been reflected in how budget reductions it failed in August. The measure was in-
early hour. order to best preserve the academic have been allocated to the various tended to take Albany politics and reg-
Deputy Provost W. Brent Lindquist quality that our students expect and de- units,” Kaler said during an October in- ulation out of the function of the SUNY
said the scheduling of the class was a re- serve. Some examples may include en- terview. “The academic units have system by reforming the state’s control
sult of university’s limited resources. rollment restrictions, soft and hard taken a smaller reduction than the ad- over three aspects of public higher edu-
“It’s a function of trying to deliver hiring freezes, delaying or eliminat- ministrative and other problematic cation—tuition, public-private partner-
all of our classes with reduced re- ing new equipment purchases, increas- areas.” ships and procurement.
sources, reduced manpower,” said ing class sizes and offering fewer class Academics haven’t gone completely John Marburger III, vice president
Lindquist. The availability of classroom sections,” said Vittamo. unscathed. Sophomore Meaghan Brod- for research, experienced the state’s
space and faculty are factors which de- Physics 131 is a required course for erick said course availability for spring budgetary problems during his tenure
termine the classes that can be offered. many engineering and science students 2011 was the major change she noticed as the university’s third president be-
“We have issues on both, to be very and it needed to be expanded to ac- on campus this semester. She said, on tween 1980 and 1994. “We went
frank about it,” said Lindquist. “We are commodate the demand for the only Nov. 15, that only seven organic chem- through three recessions—one of them
trying to maximize the giving of classes section of the class, said Rick Gatteau, istry labs still had a few open spaces and around 1980 was, up until now, the
based on space we have available and director of Undergraduate Advising. fewer sections of classes were being of- most serious recession since World War
faculty that we have to teach.” “When you’re an administrator and you fered when the biology major registered II,” Marburger said. “So, I’m familiar
The scheduling of the Classical have to make a decision, you have to for her classes. with recessions and state budget cuts.
Physics class is not the sole manifesta- weigh both sides,” said Gatteau. “Do Kaler said he didn’t think students None of them is as bad as this.”
tion of the university’s hardships. you keep the time slot and limit enroll- were fully aware of the extent of the uni- Marburger said that in the past, the
“The number of our course sec- ment or expand capacity?” versity’s financial situation. state legislature had increased tuition to
tions have been reduced by 12 percent Iqbal said the class’ time slot is an “Because if they were, I think they’d resolve SUNY’s budget problems. “The
in the past two years,” said university obstacle to learning. “That’s what’s be much more involved in the political legislature likes to keep the tuition low
Budget Director Mark Maciulaitis on going to kill the students, not the con- process in Albany to get some relief for but you can’t keep it flat forever,” said
Nov. 2. “In the past three years, the cepts,” said Iqbal. SUNY,” Kaler said. Marburger. “You have to increase it oc-
2 the stony brook PRESS
CONTRIBUTOR LIST
R.J. HUNEKE
LIZ EARLY
SARAH EVINS
BRYAN CARROLL
GINNY MULÉ
EVAN GOLDAPER
SAMUEL KATZ
MEGHAN ADAMO
DANIEL UNDERHILL
THE DOVE
The dove
white, snow white
fluttering, flying
up and down
diving, soaring
peaceful
placid
not to be denied
regal
royal
not to be ignored
resting on high laurels
to be aspired to
war and peace
carrion and dove
the dove
glimmering like white snow
peaceful
going
above and below
hard to be
easy to disown
as we grow
harder it gets
to be the beautiful
doves
finding ourselves
but yet,
not our selves
LITERARY SUPPLEMENT FALL 2010
5
POEMS
LIZ EARLY
THE CIRCLE SILVER WHITE
Lights swirling
turning, spinning. BEAUTY
Going up, up, up The silver white beauty falls all around us
and there’s the fall. covering the trees.
Diving, lowering, falling. Oh so picturesque,
Then it starts anew, its brilliance is blinding.
an endless cycle, The pristine elegance on the ground and tress
the spiral. truly is magnificent.
How pointless the defeat of darkness, To be graced with its presence,
if it starts over and rises again. the highest honour.
But do not think such,
it is worth it,
For our children.
Life to the dying,
in their hands lying.
It is not pointless,
it is full of hope.
“Hope” is a bird in my heart,
it flies, soars,
up and down, I HAVE A DREAM
it will give us joy.
Joy, sweet serendipity, leading to two paths
diverging in a wood. “I have a dream,” he said
There they are, and what a dream he had.
which to take? Remembered to the ends of time,
Don’t ‘go with the flow,’ but forgotten in an instant.
blaze your own trail.
Trails, where do they end? “I have a dream,’’ he said,
“What’s it all about?” you say. a wonderful dream it was.
I’ll tell you. Forceful yet gentle,
It is the circle of light and dark, quiet and proud.
good and evil,
life and death. He had a dream,
That’s what it’s about. and what a dream it was.
Take my advice,
think.
About what you are trying to do.
To me.
To you.
To the circle.
the stony brook PRESS
6
POEMS
R.J. HUNEKE
THE UNKNOWN
ROAD
The billboard tags flapped in the wind ALOUD
Like the noisy swans taking off
When one Tail broke free I sneezed the sound of my thought
Taking the dancing words along Honestly
The unknown road It was met harshly
Ripping the pages to scraps
There are stops, the end, that are known
Getting there the Tale is young I coughed and choked rebuttals
Blind, deaf and mispelled Solemnly
Jumping and backpedaling on Fair was the temptress
The unknown road Emptying my head of sand.
Where was Aphrodite the nude, Hermes What if the porous ground sediments
the hungry? churned and swam?
When the sharpened stars fell Finding one grain to merge
Like rain in a desert Wet
Stunned Soft
Soaked Mud
Shards Her love of Cupid’s bow.
The pink child’s grenades
these nights
of dissolved kaleidoscope horizons
have faded into fluorescent basement walls
opaque as chalk crumbling from the ceiling
opaque as I am mute
these goggles
these goggles
can't keep me from drowning.
And though they walk through the muddled deep with assured clarity,
Clearer still
is this fleeting kiss of oxygen bubbles, advancing into the horizon.
the stony brook PRESS
10
BREATHE
GINNY MULÉ
A n Elvis song drifts through the air, weaving in
and out of the static from the radio. It’s Friday night,
and Rich should be here any minute to pick me up
in his homemade convertible. He was always doing
people moving about in my room. It is then that I realize I am not
alone in here, that there is another bed next to mine, which is oc-
cupied by an older woman. Displayed across the walls of her
room are sketches and portraits, all done in black and white,
funny things like that, cutting the roof off of his car amidst colorful get-well-soon cards. I can’t figure out where I am
to impress the other girls. But that was before me. I knew from or why I’m here, but I don’t feel scared or worried. “Hey Virginia,
the first time I saw him that I was going to marry him. I pointed how are you doing?” a tall Jamaican woman in nursing scrubs
him out in the crowd and told my friends, “He’s the one for me.” asks as she walks through the door with a bottle of pills. Never
Of course, they all just laughed, thinking I was joking. But if being one for small talk, I mumble something incoherent in re-
there’s one thing in life I know, it’s what I want and I wanted him. sponse. “Here is your medicine,” she says with a smile, placing a
Suddenly, he’s here. I hear his voice, but the man I’m look- small cup of pills on my tray, and a cup with a straw in it. I down
ing at isn’t right. “Hey, hon,” he says, “How are you today?” them quickly, shuddering because they leave a horrible taste on
“None of your business,” I snap back, “Now are we going my tongue.
out dancing, or not?” “How was your day?” she asks as I lay my head back down.
“Sure, sure, we can go dancing,” he replies with a hint of “Wouldn’t you like to know,” I snap back at her. Instead of getting
sadness in his voice. This confuses me, because he always loved defensive, she just smiles and shakes her head. “Oh, you may have
to go out and have a good time. I wonder what’s wrong, and as I some damage up there, but you’ve still got attitude.” She walks
walk out the door, my mind wanders so that I forget where I am out of the room to make the rest of her rounds, and leaves me
entirely. Suddenly, I’m in Disney World, surrounded by children sitting there, still puzzling over the very confusing day I’ve had.
and adults who all look eerily familiar. How do I know these peo- I start to doze off again, this time having a dream that is
ple? As one little girl runs around I hear an adult, probably her much more unsettling. In it, I am suffocating. I am surrounded
mother, call out “Ginny, get back here next to Matthew for a pic- by thick white smoke, and every time I breathe, my chest feels a
ture!” “That’s strange,” I think to myself. It’s rare that I find some- little tighter. It’s getting overwhelming, the burning smoke is
one else who shares my name. Suddenly a word pops into my wrapping around me tighter and tighter, as if it is a living thing
head. Grandchildren. These are my grandchildren, and I am on that is trying to squeeze the life out of me. Just when I think it’s
vacation with them. It doesn’t make sense. Just thirty seconds ago too much, I am awakened by the sounds of more people in my
I was on the couch in my living room waiting for Rich. I don’t room. They are changing the channel on the television. “Shh-
have any grandkids; I’m 17 years old! But somehow I know they hhh,” one of them whispers, “She’s sleeping!”
are mine. “But her ice cream is going to melt!” This voice belongs to
I look to my left, and Rich is standing there with me. At a young girl. Somehow I know it’s the girl from my dream earlier,
least, I think it’s him. He’s not the handsome 18-year-old boy I but she sounds older now. I open my eyes. “Hi Grandma! We
know, but an older, more mature person with the same face. I’d brought you ice cream!” The girl can’t be more than 12 years old.
recognize those eyes anywhere. “It’s lunch time, now, do you want But 12? That’s still too old to be my granddaughter- I just had my
something to eat?” he says. The words don’t make sense with 25th birthday last month! My kids are all still in primary school!
where I am, but I do feel a rumble in my stomach, so I nod my “Hi…” I reply vaguely. She has chocolate syrup on her face, and
head. He holds a spoonful of soup to my mouth. Mmmm. is holding a Friendly’s take-out cup of vanilla ice cream with
Split pea soup: my favorite. “When the hell did you learn brownies and hot fudge. I smile at her cheery attitude.
to make split pea soup so good?” I ask. He just smiles and chuck- She sets her ice cream down on the radiator and pulls out
les, shaking his head. The room is hazy around him, but I’m a small cup of pistachio ice cream. “Want me to help?” she asks,
pretty sure we’re not in Disney World anymore. I can detect that still smiling. As I nod my head, she grabs some ice cream with the
same sorrow I saw before in his attitude. spoon, making sure to get a little whipped cream, too. I close my
Sometime after I finish the soup and my coffee (which mouth on the spoon and savor the cold familiarity of the ice
was horrible, by the way- I need to get a better coffeemaker next cream. I’ve always loved pistachio ice cream; that’s something I
time I’m out), I drift off to sleep and have strange restless dreams do know. In between mouthfuls, I see her eating her own ice
about the children at Disney World, my “grandkids.” I see flashes cream, so I make sure to take an extra long time between bites. I
of their lives, at all different ages, and wonder what it all means. finish the entire cup, and the girl tosses it in the garbage can that’s
The dreams are spooky, but not unpleasant. In fact, a warm feel- next to my bed.
ing washes over me when I see the children smiling and having I look around and see everyone’s eyes fixated on a small
fun. If only I understood who they were! television in the corner of the room. I am startled to see that the
Now I’m awoken from my afternoon nap by the sounds of pictures on the screen are in color, but then I remember that Rich
LITERARY SUPPLEMENT FALL 2010
11
BREATHE
and I had saved up for one of those fancy new color TVs. I did-
n’t realize he had bought it and set it up. We’re watching a co-
median doing stand-up. I hear all of the jokes, but by the time I
can figure out what he’s said, he’s on to the next joke, leaving me
no time to figure out why the first one was funny at all. But I like
the company this family provides, and so it really doesn’t matter
what’s happening on TV.
“Did Dad come and visit you today, Mom?”
The blond woman, the little girl’s mother is asking me.
She’s sitting at the foot of my bed. Could she be my daughter?
Somehow I know she’s talking about Rich when she says “Dad,”
but she’s got to be close to 40 years old, and last time I checked
I was only that age myself. I’m trying to figure it all out when I
realize I never answered her. She is still looking at me, patiently
awaiting a reply. Suddenly, I remember the pea soup. “Oh yeah,
he was here.” But was that today? And where is here, exactly?
“I’m going to go get some coffee,” she remarks as she gets
up off of the bed.
“There should be some in the pot in the kitchen,” I tell
her. I’m pretty sure Rich made some before he went out. She just
smiles and says “Okay,” in a way that sounds more like a mother
addressing a child.
Suddenly, I’m dreaming again. Now I’m in a strange
room, a doctor’s office I guess, sitting on an examination table.
Rich is with me, and he looks troubled. As I am about to speak,
to ask him what’s wrong, the doctor strides in briskly, holding a
clipboard and wearing a blank face that tried too hard to convey
no emotion.
“Unfortunately, Virginia, we’ve got some bad news. It ap-
pears your lung cancer has metastasized in your brain. Our only
option now is to do a radiation therapy. The prognosis is good
that we’ll be able to get rid of the cancer, but there is a chance that
you may lose some brain function as a side effect. One of the
most common side affects is progressive dementia, which means
you will gradually lose your memory and cognitive functions.
But if we don’t do the treatment…”
His voice trails off and I wake up, shaking. It’s all come
back to me now. My life- meeting my husband, raising my chil-
dren, traveling with grandchildren- slowly pieces itself together.
And then the cancer.
The surgery.
The doctors.
The half of my left lung that was no longer a part of my
body.
The brain cells that had died, and continued to die, as an
after-effect of the radiation.
I open my eyes and see that there are still people in my
room. I recognize my daughter, her husband, their two children.
The recognition must be apparent in my eyes because my daugh-
ter approaches my side. The rest of them freeze as if a sudden
movement will break my concentration and render me lost once
more.
the stony brook PRESS
12
IN THE ROUND
MEGHAN ADAMO
T
here, all done,” her work, she tossed the hat in happen? she wondered. I her of her embarrassment and
she said, weav- her bag and decided to take a should never have assumed heartache. She took it out and
ing in the final walk. that he might like me back…he looked at it. What should she
end of the hat After walking a little never said there weren’t other do with it?
she’d just fin- while she happened to spot girls…I should have known I could still give it to him
ished. him. She got that fluttery feel- better than to get my hopes I suppose…she thought. She
“I really hope he likes ing in her stomach. Oh good! up…the higher your hopes, the looked at the hat and thought
it…” she said. But of course I can give him his present harder they fall… It hurt even of all the work she’d put into it.
what she really meant was, “I sooner than expected! she more because it was the first She had put a little bit of her
really hope he likes me.” thought. She walked towards time in a while that she had heart into each one of those
The hat had been made him and right as she was about gotten her hopes up about a stitches. And now that she
for a boy. They’d met a few to call his name she realized he guy. She could just so easily knew she wasn’t going to get a
months ago when he dropped was not alone. He was cur- picture them together, and had stitch of that love back, what
his little sister off at the crochet rently attached to the mouth of so badly wanted it to happen. was the point? He didn’t know
class she taught and they had some other girl. The butterflies She had spent hours day- she’d made it for him, he wasn’t
quickly become friends. Lately in her stomach had been shot dreaming of what it might be expecting it. He wouldn’t miss
she’d been feeling like their and her heart sank. like. it (would he even miss her?).
friendship could possibly be- Who the fuck is that Maybe if I’d shoved my I could frog it…she
come more. She was pretty shy, skanky bitch?!? she said to her- tits in his face and worn a skirt mused. She ran her fingers
and wasn’t really sure how to self. What she actually said out so short it makes the world my over the knot and thought
make the first move so she was loud was, “Oh…um…” before gynecologist like that skank, I’d about picking it out and rip-
hoping this gift would help turning around to find an al- have had a chance too, she ping the whole thing apart.
push things to the next level. ternate route. Anywhere but thought somewhat bitterly. There would be some satisfac-
She’d decided to make him a here would do. She sighed. That was tion in feeling the stitches
hat because one windy day he’d She quickly walked away her problem. She was always slowly come undone. In a way
mentioned how much he hates and as she walked, she thought. the nice one, not the oversexed she hoped it had a voodoo ef-
his hair getting blown around. How could I be so stupid? man chaser. Always the friend, fect, and he’d feel each stitch
Boys can be pretty clueless How could I think he might ac- rarely the girlfriend. Theoreti- coming undone tug at his
sometimes, so she just hoped tually like me? The more she cally she could change. Wear heart, his conscious. But she’d
he remembered this too, and thought, the more her eyes lower shirts and shorter put too much work into it to
would appreciate the gesture. filled with tears. It got so bad skirts…flirt shamelessly with just destroy it like that. It
She was planning on giving it she had to sit down on the clos- any male with a pulse. But that would be a shame to ruin a
to him the next time they met est bench, before she risked just wasn’t her. perfectly good hat and waste
up outside of her class. bumping into someone or Why should I try to be this special, rather expensive,
Normally she could fin- something. something I’m not? she pon- yarn. She contemplated leav-
ish a hat in an afternoon. This She blinked back the dered. If I do get a guy that ing it on the bench for some-
one however, had to be special, tears. She refused to cry in way, it wouldn’t be the real me one else to find. But it risked
so she worked extra hard on it public. Just because her heart he liked…just some whore. ending up in the trash that way,
and it had taken her a couple of had just gotten the shit kicked After sitting and think- which would still be a waste.
days. It was an intricate pat- out of it didn’t mean the whole ing for awhile, she finally She sat there for a little
tern, and involved a lot of color world had to know. She didn’t started to feel a bit better and bit, just holding the hat in her
changes, which meant a lot of need the pity of strangers. her eyes had dried. Her nose hands, letting the soft texture of
ends to weave in. She’d even Some people thrived on the was probably still bright red, the yarn brush over her fingers.
used these really fancy hand- pity of others, but she did not. but she could always just blame Suddenly she stood up. She put
spun yarns bought from a little She didn’t need to hear some that on allergies or something. the hat on and checked out her
local yarn store. It had taken random person’s own commis- Then she remembered the hat reflection in the nearest win-
some extra time, but it was fi- erative story of heartache. Hers sitting in her bag. It was sitting dow.
nally done, and the result was was all she could handle at the in there like the tell-tale heart, “Huh...” she said, “it
worth the extra effort. It was a moment. except instead of reminding looks better on me than it
nice day out, so after admiring How could I have let this her of guilt it was reminding would have on him.” And with
LITERARY SUPPLEMENT FALL 2010
13
IN THE ROUND
that she continued on her way, of ignored her; he did like of his way and started to chase his mother calling to tell him to
this time actually able to enjoy someone else after all. But he after the one he really wanted. get home so he could drive his
the lovely day that surrounded started thinking that maybe He tried so hard to catch up, sister to her crochet class. He
her. this was what he needed to get but she was already gone. desperately wanted to ask her
back his confidence and finally He continued on in the to do it, just this once. But he
Turning Point (chain 2) work up the nerve to ask out direction he’d seen her go for a knew his mom wouldn’t listen
He’d just gotten out of a the girl he actually liked. little bit longer, but when he to excuses, and he just didn’t
bad relationship when he met He started flirting back couldn’t find her, he plopped have the energy to argue.
her. His little sister was going and things quickly evolved be- down on the nearest bench. He slowly stood up and
through one of her phases and tween him and the girl from He held his head in his stretched. He was feeling a bit
wanted to learn how to cro- his job. They hooked up a few hands. God, I am such a jack- drowsy from so much time in
chet. Since he’d been moping times, and while great, it just ass! he thought. Why did I the sun. After rubbing his eyes
around the house since his never felt right. This girl had ever think this was a good in attempt to wipe away the
break-up, his mom insisted he helped him get his confidence idea?!? He felt like he’d just sleepiness, he turned to face
get out of the house and drive back, but he still liked someone been punched in the stomach. the slow walk back to his car.
his sister to, and pick her up else. He knew he couldn’t lead The thought of losing her over
from, her crochet classes at the this chick on much longer. some girl he barely knew made Turning Point (chain 3)
local community center. One day after work he him feel sick. As she set up for her
That was where he met asked her to take a walk How will I explain this? crochet class, she reached up
her. She was his sister’s around. He needed to find he wondered. I don’t think, and felt the hat on her head.
teacher. The moment he met some way to let her down gen- “Well obviously I was making Normally she’d take a hat off as
her there was just something tly. They made some idle chat- out with that girl for your ben- soon as she got inside. But not
about her he liked and found ter at first, but soon fell silent. efit” will go over very well… tonight. She knew he’d be
comforting. She seemed like a Eventually he turned to face He sat there for awhile, there to drop off and pick up
genuinely nice and kind per- her. still cradling his head in his his sister, and she wanted him
son. He got her number by “What’s wrong hands, just thinking. If only I’d to see it. Maybe he’d even
saying he wanted it so if he was sweetie?” she asked. She had the balls to end it compliment it. She wanted
running late picking up his sis- looked at him coyly and sooner…if only she’d walked him to see what he’d missed
ter he could call to let her smiled. up a couple of minutes later. If out on having; both the hat and
know. But he really just “Well…” he started, but only I’d been man enough to her. She told herself that she
wanted to talk to her. she quickly cut him off. ask her out in the first place… didn’t need him to want her,
Once they started talk- “I bet it’s nothing a kiss After a while he lied but she still wanted him to
ing they quickly became can’t fix,” she said, while run- down on the bench, closed his want her.
friends. She was exactly what ning her hand up his chest. Be- eyes and just let the sun wash The first students in her
he needed to get over his ex- fore he could protest she was over his body. The sunlight class started arriving, so she
girlfriend. The more they on her toes, leaning in and her warmed his skin, but his heart quickly checked herself in the
talked and hung out, the more lips were on his, her tongue in and the knot in his stomach re- mirror and waited for him to
he liked her and the better he his mouth. He briefly let him- mained cold. Maybe I could show up.
felt. self enjoy the kiss. If only he’d use this as sort of a test…he
While he was pretty known that any enjoyment was thought. If she’s not that upset, ***
much over his ex, he still had a about to come to a screeching then she probably didn’t like He couldn’t face her
problem. His confidence was halt. Right when he opened his me anyway, so no harm done. tonight. It was too soon…he
still shot. He knew he liked eyes, about to break apart the Of course if she does, or did, still wasn’t sure how to deal
her, but he had no idea if she kiss, he saw her… turning and like me and is upset, I’m in with this. Dropping his sister
liked him too. He knew he hastily walking away. deep shit. He had no idea what off wasn’t a problem, he just
wouldn’t be able to take more He pulled away quickly. he was going to do. All he watched from the car to make
rejection. So when a sure thing “Fuck!” he cursed. knew was that he couldn’t sure she got inside alright.
came along, he decided to go “Ok,” she giggled, and stand to lose her, as a friend or Picking her up was posing a
for it to help boost his ego. started to grab his hand to lead otherwise. problem however. Their
This new girl at his job him off. While wallowing in self mother insisted he go inside
started flirting with him her “What?!? No! Not you! pity, he felt his thigh vibrate. It and get her, and not have her
first day. At first he just kind Dammit!” He moved her out was his phone ringing. It was wait outside for him where,
the stony brook PRESS
14
IN THE ROUND
MEGHAN ADAMO
“any whack-job with a sick that slut…what a jerk. Not late for. I didn’t mean to run What if he’s dead! No, no…I’m
fetish could grab her.” even detaching himself from off like that. he (rep)lied. sure if he was dead his sister
He got back early and sat her long enough to pick up his After a few minutes his wouldn’t have come to
in the car trying to figure out sister…whatever. I don’t care. phone buzzed again. class…but still…
how to avoid seeing her. Sud- I don’t need him. Whatever. I was pretty She continued to worry
denly he had an idea. He But no matter how many upset, but this guy started com- for a few more minutes before
popped the hood and got out of times she told herself that, she forting me and anyway, I was picking up the phone to call
the car. He started tinkering couldn’t help feeling otherwise. just wondering if since we him. Unfortunately calling did
with the various parts. He did- She took off the hat and tossed aren’t that serious anyway, if not help put her mind to rest,
n’t have a clue as to what the it back in her bag before lock- you didn’t mind if we saw other since he didn’t answer. She had
fuck he was doing, but as long ing up the classroom and head- people. to settle for leaving a voicemail.
as he looked busy, he figured ing home, again feeling hurt He stared at his phone a “Hey…it’s me…I’m just
his plan would work. Eventu- and disappointed. All the pos- minute in disbelief. Then he calling to see if you’re alright. I
ally one of his sister’s friend’s itive thoughts about herself and threw his pillow across the saw someone else pick up your
moms showed up. She stood her situation from earlier were room. sister the other day, and now I
by the door smoking, waiting gone. “This bitch ruins my life haven’t heard from you…so
for the class to be over, so he *** by kissing me at the worst pos- yeah…just making sure you’re
waved at her to get her atten- He spent most of the sible moment and now she not dead. Call me back…”
tion. night in bed, staring at the ceil- wants to see other people?!?” She hung up the phone
“Hi. My car was making ing. There was too much run- he screamed in his head. He and quickly set to work cro-
some weird noises on the way ning though his head for sleep punched his remaining pillow cheting to help keep herself
over, so I’m trying to figure out to come. Millions of “what ifs” before coming to a realization. from worrying while waiting
what’s wrong. Would you were running though his mind. Wait a minute…the for him to call back.
mind picking up my sister and He wondered how long he whole reason I was there with ***
walking her out here for me?” could avoid her, how long he her in the first place was to end Well, at least she doesn’t
he asked. should avoid her, and what he it because I wanted to see want me dead. That has to be a
“No problem hun,” she would do when he could not someone else… good sign, he thought after lis-
replied. The smoke exhaled avoid her any longer. He threw the other pil- tening to the voicemail he’d dis-
during her reply lingered in the His eyes had finally low, this time more out of frus- covered on his phone after
still evening air. She wasn’t that closed from exhaustion and tration and defeat than anger. getting out of the shower.
old, but her voice was already he’d started to drift off when a He lay back down on his now He knew he had to call
starting to get that old lady loud buzzing startled him back pillowless bed and waited for her back, but he was dreading
smoker rasp to it. to consciousness. It was his sleep to take him away from it. He wished that she was not
He tinkered in the car a phone vibrating on his night- this mess he was in. part of his problem so he could
little longer after she’d gone in- stand. It was a text message *** talk to her about it and ask for
side before closing the hood from the girl from work. That night he wasn’t advice. He slowly got dressed,
and leaning against the car, What happened to you there to pick up his little sister, thinking over what he was
waiting for his sister to emerge. today sweetie? it read. she was pretty annoyed at him. going to say.
He felt a sense of both relief “Shit.” He hadn’t even But they were friends, and He perched nervously
and guilt about avoiding what thought about her since he’d when a couple of days passed on the edge of his bed and
he really should have faced. run off. He’d pretty much com- and she hadn’t heard from him, grabbed his phone. He briefly
*** pletely forgotten that he had her annoyance turned to contemplated just texting her,
The last of her students left her there and only thought worry, and when she worried, so he wouldn’t have to hear her
had left and he still hadn’t about how she’d ruined him in her imagination had the habit voice and any possible hurt it
shown up. When she saw his the eyes of the girl he really of running wild. may contain, but decided he
sister leave with her friend and wanted. Great, he thought, What if he wasn’t with needed to be at least somewhat
friend’s mom she couldn’t help now I have two girls mad at her that night…she thought. of a man, and face the mess he’d
but feel disappointed. me… What if he was in an accident gotten himself into. He pulled
Where is he? she won- I’m sorry. I suddenly re- or something…what he’s hurt her number up from his con-
dered. Probably out fucking membered something I was and in the hospital…or worse! tacts, took a deep breath and
LITERARY SUPPLEMENT FALL 2010
15
IN THE ROUND - CONTINUED
hit send. But it was good to have friends, occasionally have, but an awk- chances with her?
“Hey it’s me. and she wanted to have him as ward one. Eventually they “Oh…well…it wasn’t that seri-
Yeah…I’m not dead…no I’m a friend. Was that so wrong? came upon a large tree and de- ous…I didn’t think you’d
not in the hospital either. I’m She looked at the clock; cided to sit down underneath care.”
physically fine. I didn’t pick up it was time to get ready. She it. “Of course I care.
my sister the other day because wasn’t sure how she wanted to There were so many You’re my friend and I care
I was having car play this. Should she just go things he wanted to say. So about you. Therefore I care
trouble…yeah, it’s fixed now… completely casual and natural, many things he needed to say. about what’s going on in your
sorry I haven’t called, I’ve been or should she make herself as But he just couldn’t figure out life.”
kinda busy…yeah I guess it has hot as possible, to make him the right thing to say. He For the first time in a
been awhile since we’ve hung see what he’d missed out on? opened his mouth to speak few days, he managed a smile.
out…I’m free tonight, we She ultimately decided to go about a dozen times, but only “Well, that’s very good to
could meet up if you want half way – still herself, but more silence emerged. The know.” He paused for a mo-
to…yeah that sounds nice…al- slightly enhanced. words just couldn’t seem to ment before continuing, “For
right…see you later then…” She stuck her head out make the brain to voice transi- the record, we are friends, and
He exhaled the deep the door to check the weather. tion. I care about you too.”
breath he’d taken before start- It was a beautiful evening, but a For a while all they She smiled at hearing
ing the call and ran his fingers breeze brought a slight chill to heard was the soft rustling of that. She also got a bit of a
through his still wet hair. He the air. As she reached to grab leaves with the occasional bird chill, but she wasn’t sure if that
had all afternoon to figure out a light sweatshirt she spotted call here and there. Finally she was from relief, happiness, or
what he was going to say to her the empty hook where the hat broke the silence by hesitantly just the cool breeze winding its
when he finally saw her. As she’d made him had hung. asking, “So…how’s your girl- way around them.
much as he didn’t want to She had wanted to keep friend?” They soon slipped back
admit it, he had to face the fact the hat, she really had. She’d “What? I don’t have a into silence, but this time it was
that he might have blown his put so much work into it and it girlfriend…” much less awkward, though
only chance to be with her. It looked damn fine on her. But “Oh…I thought I saw there was still a bit of tension
hurt, but he knew he could get in the end, it just held too you with someone the other in the air.
over it if he had to. And if he many reminders of hurt and day…” She desperately wanted
could at least keep her as a embarrassment. So when her “Oh yeah…her…well, I to rest her head on his shoul-
friend, that’d be fine. friend called to ask if she had was kinda with her, but we de- der, but wasn’t sure how he’d
Then again, she hadn’t anything to donate to a charity cided to see other people.” react. He so badly wanted to
sounded all that upset, so craft fair, she knew it was the She tried to hide her put his arm around her, to be
maybe she didn’t like him any- perfect thing to do with the hat. happiness at his not being closer to her and protect her
way, and he hadn’t had a It’d go to a loving home and taken, but couldn’t help smil- from the increasingly brisk air,
chance to begin with. Maybe help some people in need. ing a little bit. She just hoped but had misplaced all the con-
friends were all they’d ever be. When she looked at the empty he didn’t notice. “Ah. You al- fidence he’d previously re-
*** hook she felt a bit of a pang. right? Wanna talk about it?” gained.
She was nervous. She His hat had moved on to a new “Nah, I’m fine. It was And so they both sat
didn’t want to be this nervous. person. She couldn’t stop her- a…mutual decision.” there, taking in the night that
She’d always prided herself on self from remembering that he “Well that’s good. You surrounded them. The leaves
being strong and independent. had too. know I’m a little hurt that you rustled, the birds chirped and
She didn’t want to place so didn’t tell me about her. I each one sat there aching for
much importance on one guy. Turning Point (slip stitch to thought we were more and wondering what the
I need to calm down, she beginning chain) friends…friends talk about future might bring.
thought. It’s just two friends these things.”
hanging out. We’ve hung out They met up at the park He felt a bit of a twinge.
before, this’ll be no different. that night. They walked So she was upset that he didn’t
She’d managed to convince around in silence for a long tell her he had another girl, not
herself that she didn’t need time. It wasn’t even a comfort- that he was with another girl.
him. She didn’t need anyone. able silence like they used to What did that mean for his
the stony brook PRESS
16
HOWL FOR THE STONY BROOK STUDENT
SAMUEL KATZ
I saw the common minds of this campus comfort-
able in their sanity, unaware of their hunger,
dragging themselves through their classrooms
looking for an easy fix. II
Angel headed youngsters looking for the cheap connection
through the education machine. What sphinx of bureaucracy and curriculum broke open their
Who arrived with their genetic material candy wrapped in skulls and ate their brains and imagination?
competitive cellophane, as they bought used books to Moloch! Moloch the PowerPoint, Moloch the bullet point,
sell back after they forgot it all. Moloch the statistical analysis that appears at the end of
Who rebooted their computers with the hope to create a heav- each lecture to represent a thousand students.
enly connection and read their textbooks with 3D Moloch the application, Moloch the evaluation, Moloch the
glasses thinking that technology can save us. scantron whose black dots are more repulsive than
Who yelled Hallelujah! When the snowstorm canceled their blotches of arterial blood.
classes as they waited for the seraphim to show up at Moloch the pre med requirements, Moloch the credit system,
their door. Moloch the individual lost in the system and by the sys-
Who broke their loops of Hebbian learning by constantly re tem with the help of client support.
freshing their browsers, and erasing the cuneiform of Moloch the Seawolf, Moloch the crowds, Moloch our mascot
their high school lives, destroying the last gyzym of in that gets sacrificed every time at the idolatrous alter of
telligence. the eastern conference championship.
Who were exiled from South Hampton and are now impris- Holy! Holy! Holy Stanley, Holy Zimphler, Holy Petterson, Holy
oned under incandescent light bulbs as they were forced PHEEIA. Holy the tuition hike, Holy the
to watch the desecration of a thousand recycling bins. budget cut. Holy the Hotel, Holy the home-
Who danced at the UCafe to the tunes of unoriginal jazz, as less salamander.
Shakespearian references flew over their heads. Holy the major, Holy the career, Holy the debt.
Who went to the career center in between reality TV shows, Real Holy the joy, the tears, the pen.
thinking that their TV screens reflect nothing of their Sacred! The shaved pencil, sacred the overgrown
own lives. heart.
Who fucked their present in the name of the past, forgetting Sacred the system sick with its own fever as the
that the present is future in this game. And they lied towel on its forehead falls on its eyes to
down in their beds as their GPA’s went down on them make it as blind as lady justice.
every night.
(Only later to express their anger in a 140 characters or less.)
Who watched the Humanities courses disappear because this is
a science school, and Stanley has MD after his name.
Then ended up going to class in their cheerleading skirts III
that covered more of their ass than the failed philosophy
of public education. I’m with you.
Who staged protests in the academic mall wearing t shirts of I’m with you in Javis 100 as you realize that no one can gear
Che Guevara and hoodies by Abercrombie & Fitch, yet you. I’m with you on Solar as you see your life calculated
finished in time for their 2:20 class, while the activists in in zeroes and ones.
purple watched their revolution live and die on the walls I’m with you as you write your resume and inflate the mundane
of facebook. activities you did in the name of Uncle Sam, our uncle
I saw those minds as they grew and gathered until the top layer that stares at us weirdly every time we pass.
congealed into a graduation ceremony, with cries of joy I’m with you as you swim with the dead fish in Roth Pond,
and an orgasmic sigh kept inaudible because the walls coming to the surface dripping mediocre coffee as you
are too thin, and the absolute education injected in their drag your sleepy legs to the stadium on graduation
blood, contaminated for a thousand years. night.
LITERARY SUPPLEMENT FALL 2010
17
THANKSGIVING MORNING
DAN UNDERHILL
Daniel Underhill: Thanksgiving morning at Tosc, feeling like
there was a zombie attack and only a few have survived. Day 3: One of the survivors from the building next to ours
Thursday at 12:23 needed to be escorted out. Miraculously, we found a makeshift
medical facility on the outskirts of campus. Making it back was
tougher than leaving, but we did it.
Day 1: I awoke to find an emptiness that eerily shot through
the suite. Looking out the windows, I see no movement, no hu- At the medical tent, I heard rumors that the outbreak was from
manity to speak of. Electricity, internet, and water are all still the eastern end of Long Island and was halted at the Smithtown
working properly. I don’t know how long that will last, so I’m border. Apparently it originated from a small island that does
taking advantage of it while it does. I have only seen one other government bio-warfare research on the east end.
person up on the 4th floor. A tall dark fella that I have tried to
contact several times to no success. They say by tomorrow the rest of the threat will have been
eliminated by the military and people can start returning. That
I’m desperate need of supplies, so I will attempt to venture out means one more night to survive.
before nightfall. Hoping not to bring attention to myself, I will
be staying in the tree line much as possible. Anyone else still Good luck to us all.
alive, please contact me with your locations. Sunday at 16:39
Godspeed to us all.
Thursday at 14:48 Day 4: Light floods in the window, the night has passed and so
has the danger. Slowly humanity is seen filling the campus. Life
returns once again to this torn place.
Day 2: I was unable to make it back to the room before sun-
down, so I stayed where I found some supplies ‘til I could move Let those who fell to the zombie horde not have died in vain.
out in morning. Found enough rations to last me the weekend. Let us remember them, and vow to never let this happen again!
As night falls again, the building starts to play tricks on you. I And for those of us who have survived the Thanksgiving Apoc-
have checked multiple times in the hallway for what sounded alypse, may we never forget the lessons we have learned. Let us
like people’s voices, only to find the wind whistling through be thankful always for the life we have left to live!
cracks in the old windows. There is no sign of the fella on the
4th floor. I am assuming the worst, but hoping that some way
he has made it to a safer area. As for me all I will do is be
thankful that the utilities are still running and hopefully will
remain up ‘til the end of the weekend.
Friday at 20:12
the stony brook PRESS
18
THE FIRST ANYONE HAD HEARD
T
hat was the first anyone had heard of Delano Har- wrong with werewolves?”
rison, Ghost Detective, Cyborg Sympathizer, and “Nothing’s wrong with werewolves. Werewolf Investigators, how-
Attorney at Extra-Dimensional Law. No one ever, are the most pretentious group of killjoys out there, citizen.
knew what any of those meant—I know I cer- Don’t invite them to your parties. Make a mental note of that.”
tainly didn’t—and Jake went as far as to claim that I made a mental note of it.
Delano had made them all up. “He couldn’t have done that,” I’d “Well, I’d love to stay and chat, but I must be off. As you may have
explained to him, “they’re all on his business card.” noticed, I’m in a hurry. Ghosts, citizen, are everywhere. And only
And I couldn’t argue with that. When Delano approached I can solve these problems.”
us on that gray Tuesday afternoon, the first thing he did was pres- “What kind of problems do ghosts cause? As far as I know,
ent that information to us. He handed Jake and I his business I’ve never had a ghost problem.”
cards and shook our hands without removing his leather gloves. “As far as you know, citizen. But how do you know, for ex-
“Delano Harrison,” he said in a seemingly-faked Scottish accent. ample, you didn’t fail that calculus midterm because of ghosts?”
“Pleased to meet you both.” Well, I thought to myself, perhaps because I hadn’t failed
I knew Jake wasn’t pleased by this meeting, but I was fas- any midterms yet; even more likely, perhaps because I hadn’t
cinated. Delano looked like no one else I had ever met. Dressed taken calculus yet. But then again, what if I’d had a difficult time
in a pea-green overcoat and silken top hat, and holding a long in history class because of ghosts? Or what if ghosts made me
cane topped with a glowing yellow sphere, he instantly stood out lose my keys last Wednesday? I shook my head. Why was I lis-
in the crowd of college students walking to and from class. “What tening to him? Ghosts?
is with that outfit?” Jake had asked him. So I told him what I thought. “Right! Can I help you?” I bit
“What is with my outfit, anyway?” Delano laughed. “This my tongue. That wasn’t what I thought I wanted. Or was it? It
is what all Ghost Detectives have to wear. You don’t know what was out there, though, so I figured I’d follow through.
I’d do for a nice polo shirt.” I wanted to ask him about what any “Absolutely, citizen! Come along! My sources tell me
of this meant, but for some reason it seemed to make sense. And there’s a Hydroghoul lurking in the fountain outside. I’ll need all
at this point, he checked his watch, and excused himself. “Sorry, the help I can get to properly defeat it!” So I grabbed my back-
gents, but I’ve an appointment with a client in twenty or so, and pack and set off after him. As I followed, I remembered that I
I need to fill out my mechanica-paperwork.” had class in twenty minutes. But for some reason, I still wanted
Jake scoffed loudly as Delano weaved back into the crowd. to go along with him. I couldn’t even understand myself any
“Mechanica-paperwork?” Do you believe this clown?” longer.
I wasn’t sure how I felt. I wanted to believe that Delano So we sprinted through the cafeteria, Delano explaining
Harrison was everything his business card said he was. Perhaps the situation as we went. “Hydroghouls are serious business, cit-
I really was that naïve, that I was sure that anything printed on a izen. They’re not very nice. They breathe ice mist and shoot oys-
business card had to be the truth. But really, I was certain I just ter lasers out of their eyes. Sometimes, they have octopus
hoped things would be more interesting if Delano kept showing tentacles instead of hands. There’s this one who was a manta ray,
up. After all, my business card merely read “Rodney Shuman: except with legs.”
Student” and had my phone number, email, and a picture of a I believed him. Really. “So have you ever Ghost Detected
fuzzy cat. Jake didn’t even have a business card. But as I glanced a Hydrocity Ghost?”
down at Delano’s card, I realized that Delano seemed to be every- “Hydroghoul,” Delano said, without missing a beat. “And
thing I wanted to be and had never realized. yes, of course I have. This one time, an evil Hydroghoul was dou-
It would be another week before I even spotted Delano ble-parked in the commuter lot. I solved that problem, though.
anywhere on campus. I was eating lunch when he strolled by, his Wham!”
lavender raincoat billowing behind him like a cape. “Delano!” I Once outside, things seemed to look different than they
shouted. had before. The sky seemed slightly more ominous. Previously,
He whirled around and tipped his hat at me. “Hello, citizen!” he the fountain had been one of my favorite places to relax. Had I
shouted. “How are you doing on this chilly, rainy Wednesday?” never noticed that the bricks around the basin were cracked into
I was pretty sure it was a warm and sunny Friday, but I didn’t ugly grimaces, that the fountain’s water formed dark, murky
bother to correct Delano. The way he talked made me sure that pools on the ground?
he was right and I was wrong. “I’m well,” I told him. “How have “Right. So this is the fountain?” I asked Delano.
you been? How’s Ghost Detecting going?” “Yes! This is the legendary Dark Maelstrom Fountain. The
Delano shrugged. “Eh. Could be better, but, as we always say, it’s Hydroghoul must be around here somewhere…”
better than Werewolf Investigation.” He laughed. “Those guys are I paused for a moment. “This isn’t a Dark Maelstrom
chumps.” Fountain. This...this fountain is dedicated to former university
“Werewolves?” I asked, surprised that I believed him. “What’s president Starkey. It’s Starkey’s Fountain.” But Delano wasn’t lis-
LITERARY SUPPLEMENT FALL 2010
19
OF DELANO HARRISON
EVAN GOLDAPER
tening. He was running in circles around the basin, stabbing at just wanted attention. I couldn’t believe how upset I was. Why
the puddles with his umbrella. “Delano? Are you listening to had I believed him in the first place?
me?” “I’m going to class, Delano. Ghost Detect by yourself.”
“There’s a Hydroghoul here somewhere, citizen. Help me Delano paused. “But what about the Ghost Watch Radar?” He
detect it!” held up his arm, revealing a 1990s calculator watch with googly
“You still haven’t explained how that works, Delano.” eyes glued to it.
He began looking in circles, holding his cell phone in front of “I’m going to class, Delano.”
him like a magnifying glass. “I’m looking for ectoplasmic residue, It wasn’t real. It was never real. Why deal with that? “Why put up
paranormal dregs, ghost spit, y’know, the usual.” with that kind of nonsense?” Jake asked me, that weekend. “I’m
“What can I do to help?” glad you figured it out for yourself, Rod. Stick with me. I know
Delano shrugged and told me to watch for ghosts. what’s what.”
I waited for fifteen minutes as he looked for things that I had for- And he was right, wasn’t he? And I was sure that would be the last
merly thought couldn’t be there, but then began seeing every- any of us would hear from Delano Harrison.
where. “Is this gum? Or is it ghost spit?”
“Gum,” Delano said tersely. “Wait! It’s here!” But then, one day, I found myself standing outside, wearing a
The ghost! I frantically began looking around, searching for the green raincoat and carrying a long cane with a glowing, yellow
spirit. Would it be a manta ray? An octopus? “Where is it, De- sphere at the top.
lano?” “Who’re you supposed to be?” a student asked me.
“In front of you!” Delano yelled. He pointed with his umbrella at “Rodney Shuman, Ghost Detective,” I smiled.
the statue of a horse in the fountain’s center. It wasn’t real, was it? But it was better than being a Werewolf In-
It was a statue. It was not a ghost. “Delano. There’s nothing here.” vestigator.
“Right there!” he yelled, and he began smacking the statue with
his umbrella.
At that point, I got it. There was no Ghost Detective. There was
no Cyborg Sympathizer. And there was no Attorney at Extra-Di-
mensional Law. Delano was just an eccentric, an oddball who
The Stony Brook Press Features 13
E-mail The Press at
editors@sbpress.com
ing in with cupcakes.” Danowski said The Center for Disease Control and ars that are in sweetened beverages,” Connolly-Schoonen. Government nu-
that every time there is a classroom cel- Prevention states that 34 percent of said Connolly-Schoonen. A study done tritional advice is watered down when
ebration for a holiday, instead of just American adults are obese. Obesity is a by the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s a message might threaten industry
one parent bringing in food, they all do. medical condition in which an excess Economic Research Service said that a sales. In July 2000, the Physicians Com-
The 29 school districts that Con- amount of body fat has built up to the 20 percent increase in the price of mittee for Responsible Medicine com-
nolly-Schoonen works with also set spe- point where it may cause a decrease in sweetened beverages could result in a plained that the “Got Milk” advertising
cific nutritional standards for the life expectancy and an increase in reduction of 3.8 pounds over a year for campaign was filled with false claims
amount of calories, fat and sugar that health problems. The adverse effects on an adult and 4.5 pounds for a child. that drinking milk would improve
can be in the foods in vending ma- health are what empower Connolly- Connolly-Schoonen and other di- sports performance, since the claims
chines and a la carte lines in the cafete- Schoonen to continue encouraging leg- etitians in America are fighting a large lacked scientific evidence.
ria. The standards led to a 2.6 percent islators to see the benefits of a food manufacturing industry that is She said she thinks that legislators
decrease in obesity among the 64,000 sweetened beverage tax. motivated to sell unhealthy food to the should be holding manufactures to a
students in the school districts that she She said she was pleased that Gov- masses. She said that the industry in- higher standard as to what ingredients
worked with. ernor David A. Paterson proposed a tax terferes with the market economy by can be used in food products. A lot of
A study done by Martha Y. Kubik, on soda and other sweetened beverages influencing peoples’ knowledge about food is processed. The unhealthy ingre-
an assistant professor at the University dients such as high fructose corn syrup
of Minnesota, showed that when are slowing down peoples’ metabolism
schools allowed food in classrooms, in a way that increases their risk of obe-
there was an increase in body mass sity.
index. The study concluded that school “I think there are a lot of things in
nutrition policies that promote healthy our food supply that people don’t give a
dietary practices are needed to decrease second thought to that don’t really need
childhood obesity. to be there,” said Connolly-Schoonen.
Leah Holbrook, a registered dieti- That is where she thinks legislators
tian at the university and the coordina- should step in. She said she believes the
tor of the Heart Link Program, said that standards should be set through legis-
Connolly-Schoonen and herself have lation to prevent ingredients such as
created success stories that describe the high fructose corn syrup from being
achievements they had in the schools used in products.
districts they worked with. The dieti- Over the past 20 years, obesity in
tians disseminate the stories to the leg- America increased but Connolly-
islators so they can see the successes the Schoonen said she is still hopeful that it
dietitians had in their school districts. would turn around. She said she real-
They also have spoken several times at ized that there is a lot of work ahead in
the legislators’ professional meetings SBUMedia Relations trying to improve the health of the pop-
and invite the legislators to their own Connolly-Schoonen (center) at an opening celebration of the Center for Best Practices to Prevent and Reduce Child-
hood Obesity with local represenatives and campus officials.
ulation. She said she would continue
events. with her efforts to make legislators see
The legislators listen to what Con- the immensity of the obesity problem at
nolly-Schoonen and the other dietitians in 2009 and 2010. Her satisfaction products through nutrition recommen- hand.
have to say but are hesitant to sponsor quickly turned to disappointment when dations. “In the last four or five years, I
bills that would support the policies. “I the tax did not pass both times. “The manufacturers pay their way think there is a real strong interest in
think some of them disagree with the “I find it unfortunate because it into that and are able to water down the changing, which I think is a positive
idea but I think the majority of them could have helped so many people who nutrition recommendations so con- side, so I think there is hope,” said Con-
think it’s a good idea, but not popular,” are struggling so much with health con- sumers are not aware and don’t under- nolly-Schoonen.
said Holbrook. ditions associated with the kind of sug- stand what they are purchasing,” said
16 Vol. XXXII, Issue 7 | Thursday, December 9, 2010
arts&entertainment
A Desperate Skeptic’s Review of Tangled
The Princess Bride: an excellent combi-
nation of endearingly generic fairy tale
By Evan Goldaper logic, modern humor and swashbuck-
ling. And if you’re anything like me, I’m
Writing a review of Disney’s Tan- sure you’re pretty excited about the
gled is not easy for me. These days I usu- chance to see anything even remotely
ally write reviews of things I hate and like The Princess Bride.
most of my reviewing skills involve Still, I wanted to be cynical. Sure, I
being disgruntled, cynical or, at best, liked the plot now, but I didn’t want to
apathetic. I did not hate Tangled. In fact, accept the animation. “What’s the deal
and this is difficult for me to say, I think with all this CGI in my Disney fairy tale
I may have liked it. movie, damn it?” I yelled in the theater,
For those of you college students revealing that I care far too much about
who aren’t constantly aware of current cartoons and far too little about the
releases of cartoon versions of fairy needs of the people sitting next to me.
tales, Tangled is a retelling of “Rapun- I’ve been on a crusade against com-
zel,” minus all the “stealing vegetables puter-generated animation, which I feel
from a garden” and “people becoming lacks the warmth and character of its
blind because they got thorns in their hand-drawn brother, but Tangled is one
eyes,” but with the addition of a sassy of those films that proves my cause
chameleon and a snarky thief. I tried wrong. It combines the realism of CGI By this point, I was growing fright- ney songs to actually be memorable or
being bothered by this. When I sat with a soft, painterly quality that allows ened. I was laughing! I was smiling! I worthwhile. Phew, I could hate the
down, I already began complaining. for the strengths of both to shine. “This thought that the characters were clever, songs. That made me feel better.
“Man, when I read “Rapunzel,” they is really good,” I mentioned. “Look at the chameleon was adorable, the loca- And really, that’s everything. I
stole some lettuce. Where’s the lettuce that tower! I want a tower that looks like tions were interesting! Frantically, I would not recommend Tangled if you
stealing?” I asked no one in particular, that!” And with that, I decided that I searched for a problem with Tangled. want to see a movie that you are going
thus annoying everyone else in the the- didn’t hate the visuals either, though I And there are a few. The most notable to hate. If you want to enjoy a movie,
ater. But then I realized that I liked doubt I’ll ever be able to afford a tower, was the music, really. The songs are then you should probably see Tangled. I
chameleons and thieves a lot more than considering I’m studying to be a high generic musical fare that sound like mean, not even Mandy Moore ruined
I liked lettuce, so I got over it. With the school teacher. they’re trying far too hard to be old Dis- this one for me, and that’s a first.
additions made, Tangled felt a lot like
K
W
6. Superchunk-Majesty Shredding
I wish these guys would have just sold out and made
Autotune pop to pay their mortgages or whatever.
But, they just made the same stuff they always have. Except no one
knows who they are anymore, even though they influenced every
band you like. Yes, you. So, I guess it’s like they’re cool again. Thanks
for helping me work through that.
18 Arts & Entertainment Vol. XXXII, Issue 7 | Thursday, December 9, 2010
9. When Kanye West said, “I don’t be thinking of Wal-Mart when I make my album cov- 4. When Kanye West revealed that his new album would have four super-artistic album
ers.” art covers.
8. When Kanye West donned the name “Kenny” to rap battle Cleveland Brown’s son in a 3. When Kanye West changed his album name from Good Ass Job to My Beautiful Dark
still-unwatchable episode of The Cleveland Show. Twisted Fantasy.
7. When Kanye West vehemently tweeted that he was not going to perform on the Today 2. When Kanye West interrupted Matt Lauer to ask him why he was such a douche.
Show after Matt Lauer was a douche to him.
1. When Kanye West performed at the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade wearing a fur
6. When Kanye West explained that he didn’t mean to call George Bush a racist. vest and a headband!!!
20 Comics! Vol. XXXII, Issue 7 | Thursday, December 9, 2010
The Stony Brook Press Comics! 21
22 Vol. XXXII, Issue 7 | Thursday, December 9, 2010
opinion
When a School Has No Identity -
Contemplating the Future of Theatre at Stony Brook
The under-
graduate actors
that took part in
last weekend’s pro-
duction of Brecht’s
“Caucasian Chalk
Circle” have a
Sam Katz story to tell, and it
isn’t just the story
of two lovers and
an adopted child, but the story of the-
atre itself.
The production starts with students
in their everyday clothes hanging
around the theatre and discussing the
cuts made to the production budget.
After some chatting (“Budget cuts
Shmudget cuts” says one, “”They want
to give this place to the math depart-
ment, they just a new building” says an-
other) the students decide to do a
reading of Brecht’s “Caucasian Chalk
Circle.” As the reading progresses the
performance becomes more and more
theatrical, showing the transformative
power of theatre. (In one example: at
the beginning of the play one character
mimes giving a necklace to another
then later in the play the character ac-
tually wears a necklace.)
The production drew one of the came here (08-09) Stony Brook’s theatre and when you have a tight budget you seen the production of The Caucasian
finest performances I have seen from department produced two main stage have to choose. Leadership that waits Chalk Circle. The production didn’t just
any ensemble here at Stony Brook. productions. The year I came here it for excellence and then encourages it is show the “excellence” that the Theatre
Some of the actors were common faces was reduced to just one. Now for this reactionary leadership, not visionary Department houses, but the necessity of
from other Stony Brook productions year, it appears that there will no main leadership. Visionary leadership re- having those performances be an inte-
while others were new. Either way, the stage productions at all. quires vision and plan, and excellence gral part of our campus.
cast showed incredible versatility in Whenever the discussion of budget doesn’t count as a vision. The play ends with the drunken
their repertoire. Some of the actors cuts to the arts comes up, the most com- I don’t think there is anything judge Azdac terminating the marriage
played instruments on stage, some mon explanation is that Stony Brook is wrong with assigning an identity of a of the wrong couple, which liberates our
played multiple roles of different gen- a science school and therefore priority “science school” to this university. I heroine to marry her true love. Azdac,
ders, some sang, but everyone showed is given to the sciences. I asked Presi- came to this school because of its repu- as explained in a portion of the play ti-
an incredible command of the work dent Stanley about that in a recent tation in the sciences. What would be tled “The Story of Azdac,” knows noth-
they were producing. meeting at the Press’ office. I asked him wrong is to misunderstand the place art ing about justice or judging, or anything
What struck me most about the how much the character of this school programs, like our theatre department, about his defendants, and it shows in
production was how much fun the cast as a “science school” informs his deci- have in a science school. The relation- the random rulings he declares. To grow
was having producing the show. Beyond sions as to where to cut and which de- ship between scientific and artistic this university without an understand-
the lines and the scenes, the ensemble partments to grow. President Stanley scholarship is an old one, and what ing of its character would be as frivolous
showed what theatre is really about — responded that he never prioritizes de- troubled me about our President’s re- as Azdac’s rulings, and we risk termi-
the magic of transporting a stage to an- partments based on the idea that this sponse wasn’t his stance on it, but his nating the wrong marriages. Is this a
other place, the allure of the spoken school is a science school; instead he unwillingness to articulate it. science school or isn’t it? What are our
word and the power of storytelling. The says he bases it on “excellence.” You can (On a side note: another topic that priorities? And how important are the
production of Brecht’s abridged “Cau- never have a school that is great at came up in the discussion with Presi- arts to us? The answer to these ques-
casian Chalk Circle” proved to its audi- everything, he explained, and wherever dent Stanley was getting the community tions needs to be articulated or we risk
ence that the utility of theatre isn’t what we see excellence we attempt to help it around the school more involved in this having our university be like “The Story
it tells you in the end, but how much grow campus. Anyone who has attended any of Azdac.”
you enjoy the process, how seductive its Stanley’s reluctance to articulate an performances at Staller knows that most Our theatre department has excel-
power is and how terrible it would be to identity that he sees for this school sur- of the attendees are people from around lence, what it needs now is a school that
loose due to budget cuts. prised me. It’s certainly politically safe the area. Therefore the cutting of origi- believes in it and proudly makes it a
In the last two years the cuts to the to claim that you are committed to ex- nal productions at Staller will cut one of part of its identity.
theatre department here at Stony Brook cellence (who doesn’t like excellence?), the most direct contacts the community
have been extensive. In the year before I but there are many areas of excellence around us has with our school.)
and there are many ways to pursue it I wish President Stanley could have
The Stony Brook Press Opinion 23